Getting through this
by GygyFr
Summary: A horrible car accident let Gabby and Matt fighting for their life. And it affects all the firefighters of the firehouse 51 and their family, to the point to blame each other for what hapenned. Will they manage to pass over it and become an unitedfamily to help Matt and Dawson? How will they manage to rebuild their life ?
1. Back at the firehouse

Hello readers, here is a new fanfiction ! I have a lot of ideas these few days, so I wrote them. As you know, I like when Casey is hurt/injured (a little pleasure), so I made (again) a fanfiction about it, BUT, this time...

CONTEXT : The beginning of this story takes place after 2x20 (A dark day), around four days later. Therefore Leslie Shay is still alive and Matt Casey doesn't pop the question to Gabby already, who hasn't passed her final exam to become a firefighter.

SUMMARY : A horrible car accident let Gabby and Matt fighting for their life. And it affects all the firefighters of the firehouse 51 and their family, to the point to blame each other for what hapenned. Indeed, the firehouse 51 had been called on scene, freed them from their traps on a decision that divided Squad 3 and Truck 81. Will they manage to pass over it and become an united family to help Matt and Dawson? How will they manage to rebuild their life ?

DISCLAIMERS : I don't own all the characters of the three shows.

ALERTS : I don't know at all where this story will be going to, but I can assure you that if you want some thrills, you will have, as well as sadness and a lot of injuries too. I can't tell you if there will be a character death or not, I don't know for sure, but maybe I can make my decision with your help : please let me a review about what do you want and what do you think.

I will do all the story in a 3rd person POV, and I hope I won't make a lot of mistakes...

* * *

 **CHAPTER 1: Back at the firehouse**

Gabby and Matt were still under the covers, enjoying the last four days off after the tragedy of Chicago Med, like all the firefighters who have worked in the firehouse that day. But today they were back to work. The sun began to illuminate the room through the blinds. Gabby opened her eyes and stretched, being careful to not wake Matt, still sleeping peacefully beside her. She loved watching him sleep, sometimes he was in a fetal position, sometimes in a star position. It was one of her greatest pleasures. She looked at her phone: 6:30am. She got up and dressed with her sweatpants and the shirt that Matt wore when he was a candidate. When she turned to him, she saw his big blue eyes. Those blue eyes she loved so much. Those of the man she loved. He smiled, waking quietly.

"Hello".

Gabby smiled back, and went back to bed near Matt and they kissed for a few seconds.

"What I love it when you wake me up like that".

"Oh yeah? Next time I will put the alarm on".

Matt had his puppy eyes, desperately trying to change her mind, but he failed everytime. They kissed again but Matt interrupted.

"Instead of making breakfast, we could go to this Starbucks before starting our shift".

"This is a good idea. But before that, we must take a shower and get dressed".

"Maybe... If we want to win time, we should take that shower together, don't you think?"

"I Think... That we will lose time if we do. And do you know why?"

"No..."

"Because... Every time we take a shower together, we begin to make love".

"Ah yeah? And this isn't because we are naked?"

"Maybe... Probably... Okay you're right I admit it!"

They kissed again and laughed at the same time. About half an hour later they were fully dressed and took the road to this Starbucks they had spoken. They took their usual formula and sat inside.

"I like when we come here to hang out before our shift" Matt said.

"Me too. It's on the road to go to the firehouse. Before and after shift we can come here and eat our breakfast or a coffee".

"Or both!"

"Generally Both!"

They laughed again. Four days ago, they were on the scene of that bomb attack and Gabby still had trouble to rebuild her life. Matt took Gabby's hand in his own.

"You know you can talk to me, right?"

Gabby looked into his eyes. She saw that he was serious.

"Yes I know. I'm glad you're with me. What would I have done if you hadn't been there?"

Matt tried to smile despite what she had just said. He knew how hard it was for Gabby to share her feelings.

"You were there for me after... Hallie. And you didn't give up on me. It's my turn now".

"You... You don't have trouble with that?"

Her voice... There was pain in it. Matt tightened his hand on hers.

"We all have break points. For me, it's when someone plays the hero and sacrificed his or her own life to save his or her family. For you, that's when you find yourself in a situation you can't control. We must live with it and move forward, otherwise it affects our work. In our work, a second of inattention can take your life. We all see horrible things, but this is our life, our job. The best job in the world".

Gabby listened Matt attentively. He was right. He was a firefighter, and she would be also one soon.

* * *

At the firehouse, everyone was already there, dressed for the beginning of their shift. And the fact that Gabby and Matt weren't still there was beginning to worry some of them.

"Maybe they spent these days off to coo!"

"Hermann..."

"What? I would have appreciated that if I had been at their place!"

"Hermann, It's not because you can't coo anymore, you need to see coo everywhere".

"Hey, I can still make love! I can't procreate anymore, not the same thing!"

All the firefighters couldn't help but laugh. Meanwhile, chief Boden entered the common room for some coffee.

"Casey and Dawson aren't still there?"

"No chief. They won't be long I think. This ins't Casey".

"He always comes early!"

"He's a lieutenant, it's logical for him to come before us! He must lead by example and should welcome his men. Anyway, I hope we won't have a call before..."

"If it's the case, you take the lead Hermann. I will have a talk with him and Dawson".

Firefighters were all worried, but Severide was even more. He knew Matt: if he wasn't there yet, something must have happened. He came out of the common room without arousing suspicion, went into his office, locked the door and called Matt.

 _Hello, this is Matt Casey. I'm not available right now. Leave me a message and I'll call you later._

It wasn't good at all. Severide had a bad feeling. At the same time, the alarm rang.

"Truck 81, squad 3, ambulance 61. Car accident. North Wabash and Washington".

And Matt weren't there. He was going to have an argument by Boden on his arrival. And so will Gabby.

* * *

"Come on Gabby! We'll be late for our shift!"

"Don't worry Matt".

"Gabby, I am a lieutenant and you are the PIC. We're both leaders, and we must be there before our men. And now, we will arrive after them, and Boden won't like it".

"But we will be at the firehouse in time Matt! It's two minutes away. There won't be any call, don't worry".

Matt wasn't worried, but he knew his chief: Boden won't let this go. So to go faster, he ran to his car to start it, the time for Gabby to cross the road. Suddenly, a loud noise came out of nowhere, and made him turn. He saw Gabby in the middle of the road and a pickup whas trying to brake hard. But its speed was too great, and he knew that the worst will arrive: the car was going too fast.

"GABBY!"

Without thinking, he began to run toward Gabby. During these endless seconds, in his head, everything was in slow motion. The pickup that wasn't braking yet and arriving too fast, Gabby staying there, totally paralyzed, frozen, and him running toward Gabby to save her. Grabbing her arm, he had just enough time to push her violently to the ground. He barely had a quarter of seconds to be relieved. Just before being hit by the truck at full speed.


	2. How are we going to do this?

Hey readers! I'm really really glad you loved the first chapter! For who's aksing herself/himself if Casey's hurt and Gabby too: THEY are hurt, but you will see in this chapter. I really hope you will like this one too, and please, let me a review, so I can write the next one with your advices or your demands :) Enjoy!

And sorry again about any mistakes I made, like a guest said, I'm French and making some translations in english isn't my natural dispotsition.

Bonne lecture!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 2: How are we going to do this?**

Once on scene, squad 3 and truck 81 saw only one car seriously crashed. It was a brown pickup with just the driver inside. Hermann ran to him to access his injuries and open the door without success.

"I... The couple!"

Hermann frowned.

"What about the couple... You hit someone?"

"Yes! Uh... There was a woman... And uh... A man came to rescue her! He pushed her to the ground but I hit him! I hit that man!"

"Sir calm down! We'll get you out of there in a minute, but you have to stay calm and still, okay?"

"The brakes... The brakes didn't work! I saw her and... And the brakes didn't work properly... God, he is dead? The man, he's dead?"

"We will find him, don't worry".

Hermann grabbed his radio.

"We have two other victims to find. They were hit by the truck, a man and a woman. Mouch, Otis, go up the avenue and find them".

"Copy!"

"Newhouse with me! We're going with them!" Severide said.

Hermann then turned to Mills.

"Mills, go with them. They will need a paramedic".

Mills nodded and ran back to the avenue with Mouch and Otis.

"You've found them?"

"Not yet, but let's stay focused on you okay? Cruz! Take the jaws and the hydraulic cylinders! Shay, you can enter the car and start to treat him?"

"Guys! I need help!"

Capp and Tony helped her get into the car through the passenger window.

"Hi, what's your name?"

"It's important?"

"I Need to know if you have a head injury or something else. So?"

"N-Nolan. My name is Nolan".

"Okay Nolan, you can tell me what happened?"

"Uh... I was driving and a woman crossed the street. I tried... I tried to brake, but it didn't work... My God, you've found them now?"

"Stay... Focussed on you for now Nolan. Any unusual pain?"

"Just... Just my head, my neck and my stomach".

Shay touched the area indicated to find the exact point of pain. A sudden scream reached her ears.

"Okay Nolan, I think it's just the impact with the steering wheel. Your head and neck?"

"Uh... My head hit the steering wheel. I think".

"Okay, I'll put a neck brace to protect your neck from any other injury, and settle an IV to give you fluids, keep you hydrated and give you painkillers if your blood pressure allows it okay?"

"Okay".

Shay stuck her head out the window.

"Guys, I need my medical bag please!"

Capp grabbed it and handed it to Shay. Hermann grabbed his radio again.

"Severide, any news?"

"Nothing yet".

Hermann seemed worried.

"You are sure to have hit someone?"

"Yeah! Yeah I hit someone. He called her by her first name just before pushing her to the ground and being hit!"

"What's her name?"

"Uh... I think it's... Gabby?"

"Oh my God..."

Hermann had just remembered something. Starbucks was not far from the area. He grabbed his radio urgently.

"Guys! It's Dawson and Casey! They were hit by the car!"

"What? What are you saying? Matt and Gabby were hit by the car?"

"Yeah, I said that! Matt pushed Gabby to the ground and was hit!"

A thrill ran through Kelly's spine. He looked Newhouse, Mouch then Otis. They had just seen Matt's car parked in the street near Starbucks.

"GABBY! MATT!"

"Help! Help!"

They turned and saw a woman running toward them. So they also ran toward her.

"There... There is a woman. She is injured and barely conscious!"

When they followed her, they saw traces of blood on the road. Someone lost a huge amount of blood. On the sidewalk, they saw Gabby lying on the floor trying to get under a car. She was indeed barely conscious and had a large gash on her forehead.

"Gabby! Gabby you hear me?"

Mills was the first to react while Severide grabbed his radio.

"Squad 3 to Main, I need a second ambulance between North Wabash and Washington ASAP!"

 _Copy squad 3. Ambo's on its way._

"Severide, you found them?"

"We just found Gabby! But we haven't found Matt yet!"

Mills tried to treat Gabby but she struggled.

"Matt... Matt is under the car!"

Severide and Newhouse looked each other before lying on the ground to check for themselves.

"Squad 3 to Main, I need a third ambulance at the same place as the second! Emergency!"

 _A third ambulance on the road._

"Hermann! We found them! But we have to get Matt out of this hell!"

"What is it Severide?"

"He's under a car, seriously injured. He's losing a lot of blood and is unconscious!"

"Cruz is on his way with the truck".

Gabby was still struggling.

"Gabby stay still! You have a concussion or more serious, and your right arm is broken! Gabby!"

She cried. Not because of the pain, or not entirely, but because Matt was hurt.

"It's... It's my fault! I... I should have looked before crossing the road!"

"Gabby, Please calm down! We'll get him out".

"Okay, Okay... I'm okay Mills. He... he pushed me out of the way".

"Gabby, you're bleeding, you probably have a concussion, so stay as still as possible until an ambulance arrives okay?"

"You... You're right. Tell me that Matt is fine. He is fine?"

Matt was on his stomach. He had blood on his face and hands. And to see the traces of blood, it was not by these injuries he was bleeding this much. Severide laid back on the road and passed under the car.

"Matt, you hear me? Matt!"

But he didn't move or stirr. Kelly put his fingers on his carotid, trying to find a pulse. After several inbearable seconds...

"His pulse is weak but stable for now. Mills I need... Matt?"

Severide heard a growl coming from his side. Instinctively, he turned to Matt. Matt was beginning to regain consciousness. Kelly tried to remain as calm as possible.

"Matt, listen to me ok? Don't try to move yet. You can open your eyes for me?"

Kelly held his breath. Then he sighed in relief after seeing Matt's eyes.

"Here we go... Matt, look at me, I'm right here".

His eyes moved up to meet Kelly.

"You remember what happened?"

He hoped that Matt could answer that question.

"Uh... Car..."

Matt winced. Unbearable pain ran through his spine. Even whispering was painful.

"Hurt..."

"I Know Matt. Help is on its way okay?"

"Okay..."

Kelly watched how his friend was trying to fight the pain. He had tears in his eyes, closed.

"Matt, stay awake right?"

"Mhh... Gabby?"

"She's here, she's fine don't worry. Mills is treating her... I'll be right back".

Severide stood up and grabbed his radio.

"Squad 3 to main, where are those damn ambulances?"

 _Ten minutes out. There is a major traffic jam._

Cruz arrived with the truck.

"Where's Casey?"

Severide pointed the car and asked him to follow him to the middle of the street.

"We must get Casey away as quickly as possible. We can't see or treat jis injuries".

"What are we going to do then?"

"We will move the car in front of this one with chains and truck, and then we will move this one, being careful to not touch Matt".

"It's dangerous you know? It's a better choice to lift the car and get Casey out".

"He was hit by the pick-up! Look at these traces of blood!"

Cruz looked at the ground. He saw traces of blood but also skid marks which began about a block away.

"Damn... So we have to get Casey out of under this car without moving him".

"Yeah, and the safest way is to move the car with chains and truck okay?"

"Copy that".

"Mouch, Otis! Take the chains and place them at the front and rear of the car!"

"Copy".

Kelly laid back again and saw a tears of pain on Matt's cheek.

"Hey! You're a man, you can't cry".

"Hard... Br'the".

"What? Hard to breathe?"

Matt tried to nod, but another wave of pain ran through his back.

"Hey, don't force okay? We'll get you out. Your men are working hard".

Matt closed his eyes. He was exhausted. Mills arrived beside him.

"Gabby is calm now. What do we have?"

"He was hit about one street over, conscious, losing a lot of blood. Possible injuries to the head, neck and spine, and he says it's hard to breathe".

"Okay, Matt? Where exactly you hurt?"

"Head... St'm'ch... Ch'st..."

Mills and Kelly had trouble understanding Matt.

"Okay, on a scale of one to ten, how is the pain in the head, then your stomach and chest".

"Mh... 'L'ven... Ei'... Ten..."

With what Matt said, the worst was the head, then his chest and finally his stomach. They had to get him out. As fast as possible. Mouch and Otis put the chains up and Cruz could move the car. Otis then broke the window of the car above Matt, sat behind the wheel and started the car. All the firefighters from the firehouse 51 and Shay arrived at the same time.

"Otis, what are you doing?"

"Moving the car to get Casey out?"

"No Otis, we have to lift the car".

"Hermann?"

Severide motioned Hermann to follow him.

"You can't lift the car. If we touch Casey, he's dead".

"But if we move the car like you want to, we can kill him by hitting him again, and rolling over him!"

"In this case, Shay can pass under the car and move Casey a little to prevent it".

"It's too dangerous Severide!"

"Hermann, it's my call, I'm the leader!"

Hermann was shocked.

"Okay..."

"Shay! Go under the car and try to move Casey so we can get Matt away without hurting him more".

"Kelly, he could have a SCI! We can't move him!"

Severide tried to think of a solution, as Hermann. Time was running out.

"Capp, take the jaws! We will put the car on its side!"

Capp complied, then the firefighters came to help and put the car on its left side.

"Kel..."

"Wait, wait! Matt?"

Kelly laid back and faced Casey. He could see he was scared. And he was in shock.

"Hold on. It's almost over okay?"

"Can't... 'More".

Matt closed his eyes, not reopen them again.

"Matt? Matt! Shay, he is unconscious!"

"Hurry up guys! He's in shock and lost too much blood!"

The firefighters did as fast as possible. Once done, Shay and Mills accessed Matt. The sirens of the two ambulances came to their ears. Shay ordered to on of the ambulance to take the driver while the other took Dawson.

"Main, can you call the ER of Chicago Med?"

 _Calling them._

Several seconds of agonizing wait later, emergencies responded.

 _Here is the ER of Chicago Med._

"We have a polytrauma hit by a pickup with a possible SCI. He lost a lot of blood. Pulse is low and weak but stable, conscious five minutes ago. He is on his belly, and complained of his head and his chest and stomach. How we can lift him without aggravating his injuries and create others?"

 _Okay, You must be at least three for the procedure, if possible paramedics or people who received medical training._

"Shay, Mills, Tony! Then?"

 _Put the stretcher the nearest possible of him and use an immobilising mattress. The most experienced of you will be placed at his head, another at his chest and another at his hip._

Everyone got into position.

 _You have to turn him with a meticulous synchronization, neck should remain as still as possible from its initial position. Take as much time as needed to not worsen his injuries._

Shay took his head, the others began to follow her movements. They took two minutes.

 _Then put a neck brace and inflate the mattress. Keep his limbs as straight as possible. Before inflating the mattress, check all the visible wounds and cure them. Then transfer him onto a stretcher and keep him as still and flat as possible. Once done, put him in an ambulance, bring him here quickly while carefully monitoring him in order to not worsen his injuries. It's very important!_

"Thanks, ETA five minutes. Be ready!"

They put Matt in the ambulance, taking care to not move him. Shay cut his shirt and saw multiple cuts and bruises on his stomach and chest. She placed the EKG and settled an IV to keep him hydrated while Kelly put an oxygen mask on his face. This was only the beginning of a nightmare.


	3. An injury can hide another one

Hello readers, I'm really excited today!

I'm really glad you liked the last chapters and let me reviews about your feelings! I hope you will let me a lot of review for this one, because I'm very proud of it!

But please, don't kill me :)

Enjoy it now!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 3: An injury can hide another one**

"31 year old woman with a head injury caused by a car accident. She's confused and may have a concussion and a broken arm. Pulse at 93, BP stable at 13 over 6".

"Right, trauma bay 4".

"Is... Is Matt okay?"

"Focus on you for now okay? I'm sure he's fine".

They were at Lakeshore, just like the driver who just arrived behind her.

"43 year old man from the same car accident. He was the driver, possible concussion, neck injury and he is complaining about his stomach. Pulse at 113, BP at 11 over 9".

"Put him in trauma bay 3".

"You found him? The man I hit? Did you find him?"

"Yes sir, they found him. He was taken to another hospital".

For Gabby it was a nightmare. The man who hurt them was there with her. She wanted to much to get up and talk to him but she had no strength at all to do this. She wanted so much to run away and go to Chicago Med, to be sure that Matt was okay, but she knew he wasn't.

"Ma'm? Are you with us?"

She jumped, startled by the sudden movement of the nurse beside her.

"Gabby... Call me Gabby".

"Gabby then. Are you with us?"

"Y-yeah... Uh... I'm just... Just out of strength".

She closed her eyes, thinking about everything that had happened. She was so tired.

"You're in shock, that's normal. Any pain apart your arm and your head?"

"Uh... No, just... No".

The nurse frowned. She knew that something was off.

"Gabby..."

"Alright, my head is really killing me".

"Where exactly?"

"Forehead and... The left side of my head".

"Okay, we're going to do a CT-scan, and x-ray your arm. No chest pain or stomach pain?"

She seemed to think about what she had to say.

"No... This guy was the driver?"

"Who?"

"He was brought here just after me. He was the driver?"

The nurse didn't reply. Gabby knew he was the driver. Because they said he was. She was really very angry.

* * *

At the same time, Shay, Mills and Severide were still en route to Chicago Med in the ambulance 61. Mills was driving as fast as he could but with Matt's possible injuries... They had to be careful. Shay grabbed her stethoscope.

"Shay?"

"Shhhh..."

Severide was worried about his best friend. He was lying here, half-dead half-alive.

"There is blood in his lungs and his chest. His sature is beginning to drop".

"What?!"

"Listen Kelly, he was hit by a pick-up! Stay calm, I'm begging you!"

Shay was out of her mind too. Her best friend was hurt, and so was Matt.

"We're almost there!"

With the ER gone, medical emergencies were brought in ICU. When the door of the ambulance opened, three doctors were already there.

"35 year old man hit by a pick-up and found a block away. Was conscious around 15 minutes ago, complained of head, neck and stomach pains. Possible SCI. There is blood in his lungs and his chest. Pulse at 127, BP at 9 over 7, sature is droping at 92% with the non-rebreather mask".

A doctor put a light on Matt's eyes.

"Slight reaction to light. Put him in room 3 now!"

This same doctor signed to Shay, Mills and Kelly to stay here while they took Matt. In the exam room, everyone was tensed. Because Matt was in a bad shape.

"I need to do an ultrasound of his lungs. Now".

A nurse left the room to look for it. Another was settling a central line and was preparing a chest tube.

"Doctor? Sature is still droping. 89%".

"Then intubate him. I need to do this ultrasound NOW!"

The nurse who had left, had returned with the necessary equipment. He put some gel on Matt's breast and then placed over it the probe. Just a few seconds later...

"Call the thoracic surgeon immediately, he needs immediate care! Where are these damn x-rays?!"

"Right here".

The doctor grabbed them to look at them. This was what he feared most. This wasn't good. Not good at all. A nurse was trying to intubate him without causing damage.

"Doctor?! His trachea is a little deviated."

"You can pass the DLB tube?"

"It's an ET tube sir".

"Then pass a DLB tube. The surgeon will need it for the surgery".

"Right. I need an endoscope".

A nurse arrived and placed the endoscope in one of two tubes, then began to insert the DLB tube. Another small probe was inserted into the second tube to guide the installation of the DLB tube in the right lung, so the left lung won't be irrigated during surgery.

"I'm in!"

She inflated both cuffs and secured the tube with tape while the doctor ausculted him.

"Good. He still needs a CT-scan. We have five minutes before the thoracic surgeon is there".

They took Matt to the scanner without returning to the main hall. The doctor didn't want to frighten the patient's friends because he knew they were still there. Just five minutes later, Matt was taken to emergency surgery.

* * *

At Lakeshore, Gabby was also taken into surgery. Her left arm was broken and required surgery, but something else was bothering the surgeon.

"Her vitals are unstable. Monitor her closely while I'm fixing her arm okay?"

"We're on it doctor."

Indeed, her BP was stable, but not her heartrate, and not her sature.

"Her sature is still droping sir".

"Where are you bleeding my dear... Can you x-ray her chest while I'm working on her arm please?"

"On it sir".

* * *

In ICU of Chicago Med, everyone expected a doctor. A doctor who would come here to give them news of Matt. But Hermann saw Antonio Dawson. Gabby's brother. Antonio was there, crying. All the firefighters held their breath. Everyone was afraid Antonio was here to give them bad news. All of them remembered that Gabby was conscious when she was taken to hospital. Mills remembered perfectly how Gabby was struggling to help and save Matt. Everyone knew what had happened: Matt had pushed Gabby to the ground so she couldn't be hit by the car, but he was. After several seconds, Antonio handed them a tablet.

"It's... There were security cameras on the road, and... And they filmed everything".

The firefighters took the tablet, and Hermann pressed play. And they saw everything. The moment when Matt walked to his car to start it, when Gabby started to cross the street, the time when the pick-up arrived but didn't brake, Gabby paralyzed, Matt running to Gabby and pushing her to the ground, Matt being hit by the pickup, then being violently thrown to the ground and dragging around 33 fts before stopping under a car, Gabby standing up... Then Gabby being hit by another car...

"Oh my God..."

All of them had their hand on their mouth. This video was very painful to watch. Hermann was the first to move. He hugged Antonio as tight as he could, his eyes were full of tears.

"We're here you know that right?"

"Yeah... Yeah I know. I... I'm going to Lakeshore, and call you when I have news. Call me when you have news too okay?"

"We will."

But before Antonio could go, all saw a doctor near the doors of the waiting room. He looked tired.

"You are all here for Mr. Casey?"

"He is one of ours".

"I'm sorry guys, but I have to talk to his family and just his family".

"I'm his brother".

Everyone turned to Kelly. He had tears in his eyes, streaming down his cheeks and was totaly paralyzed.

"And I'm his brother-in-law. If you want to talk to us, tell us right here right now. They also have the right to know".

The doctor looked at everyone, then nodded and sighed. He signed to all of them to sit and everyone did.

"He had an aort-"

"HAD?" Kelly interrupted.

He stood up urgently and passed his hands through his hair.

"No... No, this can't be right..."

He collapsed to the ground, tears all over his face. All the firefighters were also to the ground, trying to comfort Severide.


	4. Always in trouble

Hey there readers!

I hope you liked the last chapter haha I know, I did a cliffhanger (again), but I love this and there will be (maybe) another one (or maybe more).

So I had a lot of reviews asking me ''WTF? You killed Matt?" - Yeah, I'm a little crazy! I said I didn't know where the story could go, so maybe yes maybe no (Réponse de Normand, ~translated as ''Normand response'' because in France it's a ''cliche''). Anyway, I hope I will have some reviews again!

Bonne lecture!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 4: Always in trouble**

The doctor was so used to explain to families that their loved one had died on the operating table, but it was much harder this time.

"You didn't let me finish, I never said he was dead".

All stopped what they were doing, meaning for most of them crying.

"What did you just say?"

"He isn't dead. I only used the past because my work is done".

Kelly gave him a look... It was filled with anger and hatred. The surgeon had made them believe the worst, when it wasn't the case.

"May you sit down please? I will explain everything".

Nobody wanted to move an inch, and the doctor nocited it after one minute. Then he sighed and began his explanation.

"As I started to explain, your friend had an aortic rupture and this led to a massive hemothorax. His left lung was punctured, his heart didn't work properly, so we had to drain and stop the bleeding without stopping his heart".

"You should have put him on bypass", Shay said trying to stay calm.

"If we did, he should be dead by now. He lost a lot of blood, and his heart wouldn't have supported a stop. I confess, it was dangerous but I had no choice".

"So... So he will get better?"

The doctor closed his eyes.

"Unfortunately not yet. He lost a lot of blood, and the speed at which he was hit, combined with the aortic rupture and the hemothorax, his diaphragm ruptured too. This happens when the pressure in the chest is too high, as in a collision with a car at full speed. We were able to repair the damage without much problems. His sternum and six of his ribs were fractured, and one of them has even perforated his stomach. That's why he complained of stomach pain. We repaired the damage as well, and there is an orthopedic surgeon in the OR to repair his fractured bones".

"And... He also complained about his head and neck. You know something?"

"No at all, but during the operation, a neurosurgeon was there to monitor his brain activity. I didn't quite understand what he was saying because it's not my specialty, but he seemed worried. I can't say anything more, because I know nothing more. He will come to see you after the end of the operation".

The doctor left them in the waiting room, all the firefighters and Antonio were speechless. They were still crying, in shock. No one could move, they were totally paralyzed. They had thought that Matt was dead when he wasn't. Not yet.

"I... I have to go to Lakeshore... See... See how is Gabby".

Antonio had so much difficulties to speak.

"I... I'm going with you".

Shay stood up and began to follow Antonio out of the waiting room, but Kelly grabbed her left wrist.

"You... You will call me... Right?"

He had sadness in his eyes. He was lost, eyes full of tears. Shay knelt in front of him and feigned a smile.

"I will. Gabby will be fine. Just... Hope".

He closed his eyes and nodded. Hermann put a hand in his shoulder, desperately trying to comfort him in this dark day. Shay and Antonio left the firefighters and went to Lakeshore. At the reception, they asked about her, and to be sure to be heard, Antonio grabbed his badge and showed it to the receptionist.

"Gabriela Dawson, I'm her brother. I want to know where is she and if she's okay".

The receptionist raised a hand, motioning him to stop talking while she was on the phone. Antonio was deeply annoyed, just like Shay. He couldn't do it anymore. He turned the chair, made her get up by the collar of her shirt and began to lift her, and Shay didn't stop him. She knew Antonio, when he was angry, it was impossible to stop him.

"Listen to me dirty bitch! You're going to drop that phone and you'll tell me right now WHERE IS MY SISTER!"

Three doctors turned their head and saw the scene. Initially they were totally paralyzed, and then they came to help their colleague. Shay stood there, motionless while Antonio fought the three doctors. And he had the upper hand: being a boxer, it had its advantages. He kept punching until the fury gave way to sadness. A terrible sadness invaved him suddenly.

"I want... I just want to see my sister... And know... Know that she's okay..."

He had his hands over his eyes, weeping bitterly. No one had ever seen Antonio in such a shape, not even when his son was kidnapped by Pulpo, not even when he had been shot.

"Tell me she's okay... Just tell me she's okay".

He had collapsed to the ground, supported by the three doctors he had punched. They knew in which distress he was. His little sister... Shay finally moved to catch his arm and help him sit on a chair. His legs were shaking as never, just like his hands. The receptionist stood up, researched something on her computer, then approached Anotnio carefully.

"Mr. Dawson? Uh... Your sister... Your sister is out of surgery. A doctor will come here soon to explain everything".

Antonio lifted his head, and startled the woman with this sudden movement.

"Thank you", he managed to whisper.

She smiled a little, still in shock about what had happened but she was relieved to see this man a little relieved too. Shay and Antonio waited five minutes before a doctor enter the waiting room.

"You're family of Gabriella Dawson?"

Antonio jumped, he was still in his thoughts.

"Yeah, uh... I'm her brother..."

"No, stay here on the chair. Ma'm, you may have a sit?"

He signed to Shay to sit and the doctor sat too.

"I'm doctor Sevenson and I'm working on the case of your sister".

"How is she? She is okay?"

The doctor stayed still, with a sad face.

"She's not, but she's alive."

"Alive? Just... Alive?"

Anotnio tried to stay calm but couldn't. He stood up and punched the first wall he found. With so much force that he broke his hand.

"She... She was conscious when the paramedics brought her here!" Shay explained.

"It's right, but I have a question: was she hit by something?"

Antonio turned to the doctor, grabbed his tablet and handed it to her. She pressed play and saw what had happened. Her face turned pale after the first impact. Then almost passed out after the second.

"It explains her injuries. How is the man who pushed her?"

"Aortic rupture, huge hemothorax, diaphragmatic rupture, punctured left lung and stomach. They are worried about his head and neck. We don't know anything yet".

The doctor nodded and went back to Gabby's injuries.

"The vestibular system of your sister was severely affected by a powerful shock in her right temporal lobe and right inner ear. To be honest, it's almost completely destroyed. She has several broken ribs and one of them punctured her right lung and her spleen exploded. We struggled to stabilize her because of the amount of blood she lost but we were able to save her. She also has a swelling in the auditory cortex region".

"She is deaf?" Shay asked.

"I didn't say that. We ran some tests, and she isn't deaf don't worry. But the fact that her right vestibular system is damaged..."

"What? What is it?"

"Your sister has to relearn how to walk. This part of the inner ear helps to balance and walk without feeling like being in a fog or without be dizzy. She will have to learn to balance her body with a single vestibular system, and this will take time."

"How long?"

"Mr. Dawson, I can't predict, it depends on the damage, but in her case... The compensation period will last a few weeks, but she will keep a lifelong motor deficit associated with the destruction of the vestibular system. Generally this isn't a major problem, but there will be crises, some times when the system can no longer do the job for two, and she will need a lot of help for daily tasks".

"You mean she can no longer do her job?"

"I didn't say that, it depends of the profession".

"She's the PIC of firehouse 51 and she should have passed the test to be a firefighter".

"Mh... Firefighter is out of question. Paramedic probably, it will take time for her to get back to work, and it will have to adapt to her disability".

"How can we adapt?"

"The destruction of the vestibular system is a motor dieficit. This means that it can no longer communicate with the inner ear, eyes, and also parts of the brain controlling movements, but also the central nervous system that analyzes ''data sent'' and allowing balance. She can walk, this part of the brain wasn't affected by the impact, but the balance isn't functional anymore".

"She has to learn to walk without balance?"

"If we remove a cerebral hemisphere, you can continue to work properly, but with compensation. There are some things you can't do as before, or can't do anymore, but the brain is very clever, he can compensate when something is wrong. In the case of your sister, she will have to trust in her body and especially her left hemisphere. Your sister is left-handed or right-handed?"

"Uh... Right-handed, but why this is important?"

"Left-handers unconsciously use their right hemisphere, and vice versa. If she had been left-handed, it would have beena serious problem because it is the right hemisphere that is affected. The fact that she is left-handed is good because instinctively, she uses her left hemisphere over the right, and so her left vestibular system".

"It ... It will help her rehab?"

"Yes it will. But some times, daily tasks will be hard to do. As I explained, her brain will brownout, times when she can't properly maintain brain function to compensate the injured parts. In those moments, even sitting will be something complicated because of dizziness. I'm sorry".

Antonio was still holding his fractured hand, crying about what he had heard.

"I need to see her. I have to see my sister".

"Not before being x-rayed and casted. But after this, I will take you to her room. But I must warn you, she's not out of the wood yet and due to the puntured lung, she will stay hooked to a ventilator during at least two days".

* * *

During the emergency surgery, Matt could hear a loud noise in his ears... So loud that he became deaf. He could feel he was standing. He didn't open his eyes, he didn't have the courage. Not the courage to see what was around him. But he had to. Because this noise, he knew it. He knew it so well. And mixed with it, there were others. People who spoke. With words that he didn't even understand, but that he had heard somewhere. He didn't know where. He didn't know when. He couldn't remember anything. Everything was so blurry. When he began to open his eyes, they began to burn. Burn so hard, he had to close them instantly.

 _What is this nightmare?_

His ears were ringing as never before, even after his head injury few months ago.

"Damn... He still bleeding too much. Spend another A+ bag on the rapid infuser".

* * *

In the waiting room, they were still there to the ground, not moving. Shay had called them and gave them news of Gabby. They hadn't even thought about it, about this kind of injuries. If she was hurt like this, then Matt... Matt would be in a very critical condition. Hours passed, and finally, a doctor came to see them in the waiting room. For the first time in hours, they got up.

"You're family of Matthew Casey?"

"How is he?"

The doctor jumped a little. This wasn't his job to go find the family and explain them how was the patient.

"May have a sit?"

He signed to all of them to sit, but only some of them did it, Kelly still faced the doctor.

"I'm doctor Riley, I'm the neurosurgeon who's working on the case of Mr. Casey".

"Matt".

"What?"

Kelly gave him a look filled of anger. But this time, mixed with sadness.

"His name is Matt so call him Matt".

They glanced at each other, trying to know who would win, but Kelly was too strong.

"Matt is then. Matt is out of surgery but not out of the wood yet. He had a large bleeding in his brain, specificly at his occipital lobe, above his neck, and with a significant swelling. We had some trouble to stabilize him and stop the bleeding. He coded twice".

Kelly closed his eyes and passed his hands through his hair again.

"We revived him, and we stopped the bleeding with some difficulties. We had two choices: either we stopped the bleeding but not the swelling so Matt could potentially suffer no major damage, or we stopped the bleeding AND the swelling but there would have been permanent damage".

Kelly's jaw dropped.

"And?"

"We have some medecines to reduce swellings and let his brain some time to heal properly. So we chose the first option. I didn't say there won't be any damage, but the percentages are low. But if we had chosen the other option, there would have been a lot of damage for sure".

"So... If there are damage... What sort of damage he could have?"

"Blindness, visual defficiencies, difficulties controlling his feelings mainly".

Kelly wanted to cry. Why his little brother was always in trouble...


	5. Holding up, no matter what

Hey guys and girls! I'm glad to update this story right now after more than two weeks after the last chapter. I'm glad you liked and reviewed so it helped me to write this one.

So enjoy and let me a lot of review pleaaaase !

* * *

 **CHAPTER 5: Holding up, no matter what**

Kelly watched how Matt was so peaceful, lying and sleeping in this bed, with this damn breathing tube in his mouth, partially bandaged or casted. His left side was full of creme and gauze because he had no skin anymore, his right arm was plastered and some pins were out of the cast because it was broken in three parts. His basin was in a special brace and he had a C-collar. His legs was aslo casted because of the fractured bones. And his head was wrapped in a white sterile bandage. Fortunately, there was no fracture in his neck and back, but there was a swelling near his C3 vertebra. For Kelly, Matt was lucky. Dr. Riley had followed him from the waiting room to Matt's room in ICU.

"He was placed in a medical induced coma, so his body can take the time needed to heal properly. That's also why he... The breathing tube is down his throat".

Kelly nodded. He knew perfectly why the breathing tube was here.

"It will stay how long?"

"A few days, maybe more. It depends on him".

"And uh... If he had been brought there sooner? He will be in the same shape?"

"Probably yes. It would have been not that bad I think, but he would have been in an induced coma, whatever his condition".

Kelly thought about what happened on scene. If Hermann hadn't discussed his orders, Matt would have been in a better shape.

"Why isn't he breathing on his own?"

"In a medical induced coma, it's standard procedure. We sort of... Cut the breathing function, to allow his body to just focus on healing. And with the operation he had, it will help his breathing. The ventilator will stay a week, so his aorta can heal without any major problems".

Kelly passed a hand through his hair.

"You seemed tired Mr. Severide. You should go home and rest".

Kelly shook his head.

"I... I can't. His... Girlfriend was also hit and uh... She was taken to Lakeshore".

The doctor turned to Kelly.

"How is she?"

"Uh... Her right vestibular system is destroyed, punctured lung, spleen exploded and she has swelling in her temporal lobe near her inner ear".

The doctor looked down.

"I'm sorry. She is one of yours?"

"PIC of ambulance 61 in our firehouse yeah. She wanted to become a firefighter. And she can't anymore".

Her dream couldn't come true anymore. Kelly felt bad for her because he saw her train very hard for that, harder than the others. And he thought she will become a hell of a fireghter, she was the best rookie he had.

"You know, there's still hope. She can realize her dream".

"Her doctor said 'out of question' because of her balance".

"Not wrong, but not right either. With therapy and a proper rehab, she can become a firefighter. Look at me: I'm a neurosurgeon and my left auditory system, meaning vestibular system and inner ear, is out. I can't use it anymore".

Kelly was surprised, speechless.

"So... She has a chance?"

"If she starts the therapy soon, then yes".

Kelly sighed, closing his eyes.

"She's also in a coma".

"MIC?"

"Yeah. They want to keep her in a coma for at least two days because of the swelling".

The doctor put a hand slightly on Kelly's shoulder.

"Keep hope alright? For both of them. But right now, you really need to sleep".

Kelly closed his eyes for some seconds.

"You're right. Promise me to keep an eye on him".

"It's my job. We have to monitor him very closely, just in case".

"Thank you. Keep my brother alive".

Kelly left the room and went home. Shay wasn't there, she wanted to stay at Lakeshore with Antonio. She didn't want to let him like this. He couldn't do anything more. He had so much trouble with Matt, and seeing Gabby like this... He couldn't do it. In less than a day, two of them were hit by two different cars, same place same hour, badly injured, put in an induced coma. Sleeping was out of question. Because when he closed his eyes, he was seeing Matt under this car, he was seeing Matt in this video, on the hood and then dragged to the ground, he was seeing Matt with all this blood on his face and on the ground. He was lucky to be alive. So instead of sleeping, we began to cry. Even with Andy's death he hadn't cry. But today was a horror story.

* * *

At Lakeshore, Antonio was clsoe to Gabby, so was Shay. She was almost in the same condition as Casey, and this broke their heart. Antonio's eyes were red because of the tears that couldn't stop running down his cheeks, and he was so tired.

"You need to sleep Antonio. You have to keep your strengh for her. For them".

He couldn't fight her. He knew he would lose. So he nodded.

"I need to stay here with her. I won't let my sister alone".

"She's not alone. I'm here. I'll call you if anything happen. I promise".

Shay gave him a nice and warm smile.

"Thank you Shay. Keep me updated okay?"

"No problem. I will call Kelly to have news of Matt. Do you want to know?"

He nodded and sat again, holding the left hand of his litle sister. Shay grabbed her phone and dialed the number of Kelly.

 _Hey Shay._

"Hey. How are you holding up?"

There was a blank before an answer.

 _You know... I want to say 'i'm hanging in there', but it would be a lie._

Shay inhaled deeply, like Antonio.

 _How is Dawon?_

"No change. And Casey?"

Severide took a deep breath.

 _His doctor said he is fine for a polytrauma. And uh... If the swelling doesn't go down soon, he will need surgery again to relieve the pressure exerted on his brain._

"You're close to him?"

 _Uh... No, I came home. His doctor said he'll keep an eye on him for me. But I can't sleep. I... I just can't._

Shay heard Kelly cry through the phone. This broke her heart. She had never heard or saw Kelly like this. She looked Antonio and he gave her a nod and a slight smile.

"Kelly, I'm at home in five minutes okay?"

 _Okay._

She hung up and turned to Antonio.

"I'm sorry Antonio. I..."

"Don't worry", he said, grabbing her hand and squeezing it. "I will be fine. I can sleep here, and you can come later. Stay with Severide. He needs you now".

She nodded and left, looking Gabby one last time.

* * *

At home, Severide was still crying on the couch. He hadn't turned on the television, he hadn't grabbed a beer. He just stayed here, smotionless but crying. His head was pounding, he was having flashbacks. About Matt trapped under this car, about Matt is this bed, covered with gauze, bandage and plaster, with multiple IVs and a breathing tube down his throat. He wasn't in this condition even after the beam fell on him couple month ago. Suddenly, he heard the door open. Soon after, he saw Shay run to the couch and hug him. She was also crying. They hugged each other and stayed like this for a few minutes.

"I need a big dose of tequila. I really need it".

"Yeah... I think it's a good idea".

She grabbed two bottles and put them on the table near the couch. They began to drink and talk.

"How is he really doing?"

Seveirde took another sip and exhaled deeply.

"The doctor told me about... An induced coma for a few days, maybe more. Uh, he has a breathing tube down his throat, a big swelling in his occi... Opi..."

"Occipital lobe?" Shay continued when she saw that Kelly didn't find the word.

"Yeah. And he also has a bleeding. Uh... If the swelling doesn't go down, he will probably have damage".

"What kind?"

Kelly took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

"Uh... Blindness or visual defficiences, difficulties controlling his feelings, maybe memory loss, I don't know. I'm totally lost right now".

Shay grabbed a bottle and handed it to Kelly who took it and swallowed a large sip of tequila. After an hour, they were completely drunk. Suddenly, the phone of Kelly rang. It was hard to find it, and when he did, he picked up.

"This is Kelly Severide".

"Hello this is Dr. Riley".

His expression changed in a second. Shay did the same when she saw Kelly with a dark face.

"What is it doc?"

"Your brother... Your brother coded Kelly".

He put a hand to his mouth and gasped.

"We revived him, and checked if everything was okay, but it wasn't the case".

Even if kelly was drunk, we knew perfectly what was happening. He could feel the tears flow again on his cheeks.

"He was taken to surgery again. The swelling went worse and the bleeding has returned. We need to drain the fluid out of his brain. Maybe... Maybe it's better for you to come".

"I'll be right there in ten minutes".

"I'll be waiting in the same waiting room".

He hung up and looked at Shay. They dropped their bottles, and went to the hospital as quickly as possible with tears in their eyes.


	6. Keep hope

Hello everybody! I didn't update for a while, because I'm so busy with university (and I don't have chapters in advance). But here is the next chapter, hoping you will like it and let me a review ;)

Time to read and enjoy !

* * *

 **CHAPTER 6: Keep hope**

Kelly was running. He was running as fast as possible through the streets to come to Chicago Med in time. He didn't care about his drunk shape. He was running as hell. With the wind and the speed he was running, the tears were streaming from his eyes and down his cheeks, then going behind him. Shaywas running after him, and was receiving his tears on her face. It was hard to follow him, but she knew that nothing and no one could stop him. Matt was too important to him to lose him without doing nothing. He was desperate. After five minutes of intense effort, he sttod there near the doors. Dr. Riley was waiting for him, his face was completely closed, dark. He waited Kelly to catch his breath and motioned him to follow him into his office to have more privacy. No one dared to speak, but someone had to.

"I... I shouldn't have asked you to leave his side".

Kelly gave him a dark look. He didn't know what to say or to think. What it really meant? Matt was dead?

"Your brother was once again taken into emergency surgery. The bleeding had returned and the swelling doesn't go down. If we don't do something, his brain will shut down".

"Sh-shut down?!"

"If we don't do anything, his brain activity will stop. And in that case, there will be nothing left to do".

Kelly closed his eyes a moment. His little brother...

"And uh... He... There will be chances for him to uh... have some damage?"

Kelly swallowed his saliva by hearing these words going out of his own mouth. Damage... He heared the doctor take a deep breath.

"It's a high possibility. Particularly if the problem isn't resolved ASAP".

The docteur had a trembling voice, desite his efforts to hide his feelings. He tried to stay calm and monotonous, but having Kelly in such a bad mood in front of him, this was simply impossible.

"I... I need to see him. Please... I... Please".

Kelly was unconsolable. He smelled of alcohol, but the shape of Matt was stronger than that.

"I can't let you see him. You know that".

"Just... Just a minute. I have to see him... Please..."

Tears were streaming down his cheeks and didn't stop. Riley saw clearly that Kelly wouldn't give up until he had seen him.

"I will take you in the observatory room, above the OR. I will stay with you. The time you need".

Kelly, eyes still closed, couldn't help but nod. Riley came near him and helped him to stand up because he saw that Kelly had been drinking. They went down two floors and reached the OR. They entered a small room, above the OR where Matt was. Each sound of this room resounded in Kelly's ears through the speaker. Kelly saw for the second time Matt since the accident. His brother. His body hadn't change, except this time, his skull was open, a surgeon was inside his brain trying to find and stop the bleeding. He had patches used for the defibrillator on his chest, one on each side of his chest, the other on his left flank. He was also connected to a machine that was monitoring his brain activity. Kelly didn't understand the graph. Dr. Riley tried to explain.

"We're monitoring your brother's brain activity. This allows us... To know if there is an activity or not".

"And? He... There is one?"

"The fact that he has a big swelling and a high ICP false the result. But for now... He... There is no brain activity".

Riley was heartbroken to have said this. Kelly put his hand on the glass and his forehead, and closed his eyes. No brain activity... He knew what it meant: his brother was dead for now. Dr. Riley turned his head to one of the screens.

"Dr. Hermit is very competent. I trust him. If there is someone who can bring your brother back... That's him".

But Kelly didn't want to hear this. He wanted to hear that Matt was fine, that everything was fine, and it was just a nightmare. But this was real. Suddenly, the doctors hurried up.

"What it's happening? Doc?"

"Dr. Hermit has found the source of the bleeding. He has to be careful and do this quickly to stop it and drain the fluid out of his brain. Otherwise the damage will be permanent".

Several minutes passed and looked alike: Dr. Hermit trying to control the bleeding, Kelly holding his breath and praying for a brain activity, and Dr. Riley controlling the EEG, also hoping for an activity. Ten minutes had passed and finally, the bleeding was controlled. One of the nurse was checking his pupils for a reaction while Hermit was also looking the EEG. But nothing happened. He turned his head to the window and shook his head slightly. From left to right.

"Doc? What does that mean?"

"It means... We have to wait, at least three hours to confirm the diagnosis. If his shape doesn't improve... He will be declared brain dead".

Riley ordered the suspension of the sedation, telling Kelly that sedation could cause a brain death in some cases, and also put all the chance on Matt. He also recommended to place an EEG probe directly into his brain to be sure about the diagnosis. Kelly was really lost.

"Shay..."

Dr. Riley turned to him.

"What is it? Shay?"

"It's uh... My roomate and uh... She's Gabby's best friend. She was with me when you called".

"I presume she is wondering where you are?"

He nodded. He grabbed his phone and looked if she had called him or texted him. There were nine unread messages and four missed calls. He sent a message back to her to tell her where he was, and became very nervous.

"You... You want me to get your friend here?"

"Please... I don't want... I can't leave Matt".

The doctor tapped Kelly's shoulder slightly, and left the observation room to pick her up. Kelly sat on a seat, and looked through the window. All this was too much important and hard for him: he broke up. He ran his hands through his hair and began to cry. He couldn't imagine that his brother was dead for now.

* * *

Shay had arrived in the waiting room fifteen minutes ago. She was worried because Kelly didn't answer her texts, and this wasn't his habit. The secretary didn't want to give her informations. Suddenly, she heard a door open and instinctively, she turned her head to see what was happening. She knew the face of this doctor who appeared and was heading toward her.

"You're Shay right?"

She nodded, frowning.

"Kelly needs you. He isn't going well and it's understandable".

She looked right into his eyes, wanting to ask him what he meant. And Dr. Riley seemed to understand.

"I don't know if Kelly explained to you, but I will assume not".

He took a deep breath.

"Matt's heart stopped again this evening. We managed to restart it and ran some more tests to find what cuased his heart to stop. The brain bleeding he developped sooner had returned and spread in a major part of his temporal lobe, significantly increasing the swelling and his ICP. While Dr. Hermit was operating on him to find the source of the bleeding, the brain activity of Matt stopped. However we found the source of the bleeding and drained the fluids. But... But his brain activity didn't restart".

The more Riley was giving explanations of the situation, the more Shay was feeling bad. For him, but also for Kelly.

"And uh... It means that... Uh..."

"We have to wait. It has been an hour, so three more hours to confirm the diagnosis. If after those three hours, the EEG remains flat, then... Then Matt will be declared brain dead".

Shay understood why Kelly needed her support right now. Matt was for now dead, and Kelly had already lost Andy. So losing antoher brother, he wouldn't support it.

"I... I can see him? I mean..."

"Kelly wanted to pick you up, but... But he didn't want to leave Matt. So I came for him. He is in the observation room of the OR".

"Can I call someone first? Uh... I don't know if Kelly told you but... Matt's fiancee is in Lakeshore and also in a coma. She was also struck by a car, but Matt has protected her as he could. Her brother is with her and... And he asked us to call him if there was a change".

"Can I give you an advice?"

She frowned again. She was ready to listen, but she wondered what advice he wanted to give her.

"I think it would be better to give him the news when we will know more about his shape. If you tell him right now what's going on... He'll be scared and... Well, I think it will be better to give him a potential good new instead of a bad new and make him panick during hours, thinking there is nothing to do".

Leslie understood his point of view. If she announced to Antonio that Matt was in surgery again, brain dead, and that they will be sure about this in three hours, he will go find the guy who had done this and would kill him. But if she waited, there would be a chance to give him a good new: Matt with a brain activity. And then, the pill could pass better.

"I think you're right. He is cares enough for his sister".

"Kelly... Explained her injuries. You can't lose hope for her. She can deal with her new disability. I can't hear with my left ear, and I have the same problem as your friend. And look: I'm a neurologist and a surgeon. Some days it's harder than expected, but this doesn't stop me in my work. She has to stay strong".

Leslie smiled a little after several seconds.

"Thanks. To give us hope again".

"Here. I take you near Kelly and Matt".

She followed him into the OR to join Kelly.

* * *

At Lakeshore, Antonio was looking at his sister, lying in this awful bed. He couldn't bear to see her so vulnerable, hooked to a ventilator, covered in cuts and bruises,bandages, sutures and plaster. He had let Shay join Kelly because he wasn't in a good shape and began to break mentally, but he was also in a bad mood. He knew how to handle these situations but when your own family is affected... You broke. He sighed, tears in his eyes for more than an hour. He didn't want to sleep. He was afraid that something might happen to his little sister in his sleep. And the mechanical hiss of the ventilator prevented it anyway. A nurse came in to check her vitals and saw the fragile mental shape of Antonio. She ran the exams and smiled at him.

"Your sister is stable. It's a good thing after the trauma she suffered. You ate or drank Mr. Dawson?"

He shook his head from side to side.

"I don't want to leave her alone. I... I can't leave my sister".

In saying this, he took her hand and strocked it, letting a tear streming down his cheek.

"Then maybe I can get you something to drink and eat? Sandwich, coffee, water..."

Antonio didn't have the heart to eat or drink. But he knew that he had to keep his body in a good form. He had to eat. If he didn't take care of his obdy, it will shut down before Gabby could be out of her coma.

"It's a goo idea. Thanks".

"I will ask someone to bring you something".

She was about to leave the room when she stopped and turned back to Antonio.

"I uh... I heard that... Her fiance was also injured?"

Antonio, who had closed his eyes, reopened them and faced her.

"He... He pushed her so she... She won't be hurt. The car hit him at full speed. He... He is in Chicago Med".

"I... Can I ask you how is he?"

Antonio explained his injuried and its severity.

"I sincerely hope that your sister and her fiance will make it without damages".

She gave him a slight smile then left the room. He turned his head to his sister, still asleep in this hospital bed, a tube down her throat breathing for her. He took his phone and looked if whever Shay or Kelly had called him or texted him to give him some news of Matt. But there was nothing. So he told himself that everything was good, and this reassured him highly.


	7. Author's note

Hey guys and girls ! I hope you'll have a great WE :)

So I made this author note, because I know I didn't post in awhile. I have my reasons : university is taking a lot of my free time, so I don't have time to write some new chapters.

BUT, I'm writing now the 7th and 8th chapters this WE, so you will have some answers about Matt's and Gabby's conditions. They will be a little longer than usual, because of a lot of informations, but I hope (and think) you will like them.

So I will answer to some reviews I had (the last at least).

madisonpllbigA : Don't worry, as I said in PM, I will mix my idea and yours (but I can't tell you what i will keep in your idea... SURPRISE!).

Justicerocks : you know me lady ! I can't do that to you... Oh, in fact, maybe I think I can haha !

Edelmira Gil : gracias ! y de nada :)

CurlySue777 : Aw... You don't want him 'out of the wood yet' ? Wish accepted my dear !

Milady29 : As I said to Justicerocks → You know me lady ! Maybe I can kill him... Or not !

I hope you can wait a little more: I will post the 7th chapter in no time :)


	8. Finally reunited

Hello everybody! I wanted to post this before going to bed (almost 12PM here) because as I said in the author's note, I finished the translation. I hope it's understandable because it's just written with my own words (no translation with internet or a book, nothing!), so I'm proud of it. I know I made some mistakes and I'm trying to make them less than before.

I really hope you will appreciate this chapter. And I'm translating the next one (still in french, so maybe you can read it next WE).

Have a nice WE guys and girls!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 7: Finally reunited**

"Kelly!"

When the doctor opened the door, Shay rushed to Kelly, hugged him with all her strengh. She had closed her eyes, tears ready to flow. She could feel Kelly shiver, sobbing on her shoulder. She had never seen her best friend and roomate in such a shape, even after the death of Andy.

"Why him?" Kelly whispered in her ear.

She sighed, eyes still closed, and let herself be overwhelmed by emotion. She began to cry, shivering with Kelly, in armony.

"I don't know Kelly. I don't know..."

Seeing his legs ready to drop, doctor Riley helped him to sit with difficulties, because he wanted to see his little brother in this OR, inert and lifeless, with no brain activity. The doctor reassured him, pointing a camera in the observating room, so he could see him, indirectly, but he could keep an eye on him. Shay was a paramedic, she learnt how to read an EEG. But she didn't want to face the adversity, she didn't want to read it, she didn't want to know that his friend was dead. And this didn't escape the doctor.

"It remains around two and a half hours. He's still under the effects of the drugs and the anesthesia. We stopped all the treatments, because it can affect the diagnosis. These effects should dissipate in about an hour. I hope his brain activity will restart".

"And if it's not the case?" Kelly asked the doctor, tears in his eyes and streaming down his cheeks.

The doctor took a deep breath and replied as calmly as possible.

"As I said, the treatments received can alter his brain activity. If we stop them and if the effects go away, then he will have a clear head, sort of. If his brain acitivity doesn't restart after this..."

He paused, not wanting to aggravate the situation. But his last sentence had hit them: tears flowed even harder, cries intensified.

"But I trust him, I have faith in your friend. He got trough a lot these past few months, he can do this again. The bleeding is under control, the swelling is drained, his heart is beating, stay positive".

It didn't reassure Kelly and Shay, but Dr. Riley had positive thoughts on him, and this made them not sink, and believe in Matt, think he could do it. Kelly and Shay exchanged a look, sadness and hope in them.

"You... You called Antonio?" Kelly asked.

Shay shook her head. She followed the advice, and wanted to call him when they would be sure of the diagnosis.

"I didn't have the strengh and the courage to tell him. And I uh... I want to wait, to be sure about Matt before calling and telling him what's wrong with him".

Kelly understood perfectly. Antonio had enough problems with Gabby, they didn't have the right to worry him more.

"You did the right thing. But uh... You think we can call him to have news on Gabby?"

Shay took her phone with a trembling hand. She wanted to call, but she didn't feel strong enough to do it. Seconds passed, she dialed his number and pressed 'call'.

At Lakeshore, a nurse came to bring a plate of food for Antonio. She took the opportunity to take her vitals and noted them on the file to the end of her bed.

"Your sister is a fighter. Her vitals are stable and strong, it's a good thing. She need to regain more strengh, and she will remain sedated for a day or two but she should make it".

The nurse smiled, finished writing on the file and left the room. Antonio regained hope, he was still bad, but he was hoping that Matt and Gabby will be fine. He started eating, hunger tugging his stomach, but he didn't want to admit it. He heard someone knock at the door, and told this someone to enter. It was a man he didn't know. He had a c-collar, he was hooked to an IV and he had a bump on his forehead. Antonio frowned, thinking that this man in a hospital gown had entered the wrong room.

"Can I help you?"

"Uh... Some nurses told me that... That I could find uh... This woman here. I... I didn't want to bother".

Antonio could read the confusion and shock in his eyes. This made his own confusion grew.

"I am Nolan, I'm the man who... Who almost hit... Gabby, right?"

Antonio let himself nod, asthonished to know that he knew her sister's name. He frowned.

"I heard the man said her name before... Uh..."

"Before hitting him?"

Nolan closed his eyes and shook his head up and down.

"I'm really sorry... I tried to avoid them but... I don't understand why the breakes didn't work".

He was scared, sad and shocked. As a cop, Antonio deduced he was sincere. Fortunately, Nolan didn't know he was a cop.

"If this makes you feel better, it's not you. Who put my little sister in this bed".

Nola reopened his eyes, searching in Antonio's eyes the truth.

"A... Another car passed behind yours and... And when she stood up, this car hit her and this... Piece of shit left".

"Another car?"

Nolan frowned. Seeing his half-surprised look, Antonio faced Nolan.

"You know something?"

"Well... I was... In shock and woozy, but I heard screeching tires and I saw a car suddenly left the scene a few seconds after the accident".

"You saw the plate? You can describe the vehicle?"

"I will talk to a cop, not a civilian, no offense".

"I'm a cop. Intelligence Unit, 21st district".

Nolan opened his mouth, but closed it soon after and nodded.

"This changes everything. As I said I was... Well, I can describe the vehicle, but I can't give you the plate. My vision was too cloudy to see it".

"It's already a great thing to describe the vehicle".

Antonio signed to Nolan to sit next to him.

"It was a red peony seat ibiza dated from 2008, fourth generation, 1.2L l3, 7-speed DSG automatic. I recognize a model when I'm crossing one just by the sound".

Antonio was asthonished by the precision. Just one question was burning his lips now: how he could be sure about this despite his shape in this precise moment? Nolan laughed slightly.

"I'm working for car companies. I'm testing new models, and every car I test, I recognize the car by the sound it makes when I recrosses it. I'm lucky because I had the chance to test this car. That's why I could recognize it".

"I see".

This made Antonio smile. It could help to find the guy who did this to his little sister. And if this guy went to a garage or if his unit found the car, they knew the guy wouldn't be far. He was a huge help.

"How is she?"

Antonio jumped, surprised by the sudden question. Nolan was really concerned about her shape.

"She's hanging in there. The car hit her on her side, she had a pneumothorax, her spleen exploded, her head hit the ground very hard, so uh... Her right vestibular system is destroyed and she has a swelling in her inner ear".

"I don't want to... To seem rude but... What is it? Vestibular system?"

He frowned, he didn't know what Antonio was talking about.

"I don't know. I think it's what keeps the body balance in space. Something like that. She has to relearn how to walk with a single vestibular system".

He nodded, not knowing what to say.

"And uh... The man... The man I hit?"

Antonio glared at him insistently, trying to understand what he wanted. Then he saw that the man in front of him was riddled with guilt. He was blaming himself.

"I don't know what was your speed, and I don't want to know. But what I know is you were fast enough to let him have permanent damage. Aortic rupture, hemothroax, collapsed right lung, important bleeding in his brain and a big swelling with it. Doctors don't know if there will be damage or not, but they think about visual defficiencies, difficulties controlling his feelings. They don't know".

The more he explained, the more Nolan became pale. He passed his hand through his mouth, his lips. He knew what was going on. At least for Matt. He was very lucky to be alive. His phone rang and this startled him. He grabbed it and looked at the screen. Shay. He picked up and put the phone at his ear.

"Shay?"

"Antonio uh... Kelly and I we... We wanted news".

Antonio opened his mouth, but frowned. Her voice was really weird.

"Everything is okay Shay? Your voice is... Weird..."

"Oh! Uh... Lets say... Kelly and I are a little drunk".

Antonio wasn't convinced at all by her explanation. But he wanted to reassure her.

"Uh... According to the nurses and doctors, Gabby is stable. No change since you left. You're sure everything is okay?"

"Yeah, yeah... Everything is okay Antonio".

"Okay... What about Matt? You have news?"

"Uh... Doctor Riley called. He is stable too. They will keep him in a coma for two or three days to help him recover from his aortic rupture and diaphragmatic rupture. But he should be fine".

"It's good to hear".

"Kelly and I, we'regoing to bed, to get the alcohol out of our system. And... We'll come back tomorrow okay?"

"No problem. Call me if anything happens to Matt".

"I will. Do the same for Gabby".

"Yeah. Sleep well".

Shay hung up and burst into tears. This wasn't her type to lie. But she had no choice. Antonio had enough problems with his sister.

"Hey Shay. He will understand when he will know okay?"

Kelly hugged her and let her cry on his chest for a dozen of minutes. She was ready to mentally burst. Kelly looked up at Riley, trying to ask him what were the news without saying a word. Dr. Riley seemed to understand this forbidden question, and shook his head from side to side. News weren't good: Matt was still dead on this table, and two hours passed. Dr. Hermit, on the other side of the glass, was impatient.

"Riley? Do you think we can try now?"

Kelly jumped: it was the first time he was hearing his voice. He had a deep voice, a little hoarse. But he didn't know what Dr. Hermit meant.

"Doc? What is it?"

Dr. Riley turned to Kelly and sighed.

"Normally, brain activity should have restarted. But this isn't the case. We are going to stimulate his brain to restart it. Weel, we hope to do it. We use it only in rare case, and we never used it on a brain damaged like this".

"What? What are you talking about?"

"It's experimental, that's why we're using it in rare case, and with the approval of the family. So your approval".

Kelly opened his mouth, but no sound came out. Shay talked for him.

"What are the risks?"

"Death, if we do nothing. We have tested this method on about forty people, and twenty-seven are alive".

"Alive?"

The neurosurgeon knew what she wanted to know.

"Three are vegetables, five are still in a coma. But the other nineteen left the hospital and are alive".

"And if the operation is a success? There are risks, right?"

"Yes. As I said, some remained in a coma, others are vegetables, and those who woke up have had to relearn major things they had learnt. Walking, speaking, reading, writing, eating... But these patients relearnt quickly because they knew how to do it. In fact, this operation is like a 'reset' of the brain. But what is weird is that they kept a great part of their memories, their feelings, but they didn't have word to explain them, or to put words on something".

Shay and Kelly seemed worried.

"If it makes you feel better, people on who we're doing this operation don't have huge sequelae now. At the beginning, it wasn't good at all, but since two years, we have a 100% success rate, and less problems. In each operation, we improve this technology. So your friend has a great probability to get out of there alive, and also have the least possible damage".

Kelly and Leslie looked each other, ready to give their approval. But they were afraid to not see the Matt they had known.

"There is a huge probability to get him through this then..."

"To keep him alive yes, but without problems, I don't think so. But every patient is reacting differently, so we can't be 100% sure before his awakening".

"If he wakes up", Kelly said.

Shay gave him the look, but knew he had a point.

"But despite this, we can try right? If Gabby wakes up and... And she learns about Matt... I think she will never be the same. And if we do nothing, we'll be destroyed by guilt, to have done nothing but also to see Gabby affected by his death".

Kelly took some seconds to think about it.

"I think you're right. Once again".

He turned to Riley and nodded lightly.

"Go ahead. Do everything you can to bring my brother back".

Riley smiled and gave the green light to Hermit.

"How long?"

"Well, it depends in which intensity his brain will react, but in general no more than a dozen of minutes. But the higher the intensity, the greater the damage. We never went this far to restart a brain".

"And where did you get this idea?"

"Restart a brain? There were some studies not a long time ago, proving that people with no brain activity, can still have a weak residual brain activity. The purpose of this trial is to capture this signal and implify it to restart the machine. It works as a cardiac defibrillator, but for the brain, to simplify. The results weren't good at first, but there're improving. As I said, the last people tested lives an almost normal life now".

An almost normal life. This sentence turned in his head. Ten minutes passed, without a noise, Kelly and Leslie waiting for an answer from Riley.

"We're ready", Hermit assured.

"Alright, we slow slow and in the lowest intensity to see his reaction".

Kelly didn't understand well, and he didn't want to know. He just wanted Matt alive, with a brain acitivity.

At Lakeshore, Antonio was worried. Shay called him earlier to give him some news, but in her voice, he knew something was wrong. He heard sadness and fear. Something was going on. His cop instincts had taken over. He looked at his sister, peacefully sleeping, grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

"You think about the same thing uh? There's something going on and I want to know what it is".

He grabbed his phone and contacted Kendra.

"Antonio? What a surprise!"

"Hey Kendra, I don't bother you?"

"I'm on shift but I have five minutes. There is a problem? I heard about Gabby".

"I... I don't know if there is a problem. Maybe I'm becoming crazy, but I want to be sure".

"Spill it out".

"Casey... Casey was involved too. And he is in your hospital. And Shay called me earlier to tell me that everything was good but... But in her voice..."

"Say no more. I'll check".

Kendra verified on one of the computer. She saw that Matt was in the OR for a brain surgery and he hadn't returned yet. After three hours. This wasn't good. She had to find a logical explanation. Knowing Shay and with Gabby in a bad shape, she thought that Leslie didn't want to stress him more than he was. So she lied to him.

"I don't have much information in the ER computer. But it means that he is stable and there is no problem. But if something happens, I'll call immediately. I promise".

"Thank you Kendra".

"How is Gabby?"

"She uh... She's in an induced coma. According to the nurse, she is stable and her vitals are strong. It's a good thing apparently".

"A great thing even. It means she's healing good and is supporting the drugs. She will be on her feet in no time".

"I don't know. She'll have to relearn to walk with a single vestibular system. Anyway, I didn't understand well, but..."

"Keep hope Antonio. For your sister. And also for Matt. I have to go, we're overcrowded here".

"Okay, thanks".

He hung up. His concern wasn't as high as before, but the fact that he was far from Matt and he couldn't check himself stressed him.

In the OR, Dr. Hermit continued to increase the power of the stimulation, but it made no difference. Matt still didn't react.

"We're almost at the max".

Dr. Riley had still his eyes glued to the screen, ready to scream if he saw a change.

"Maybe..."

"No!", Riley interrupted.

He didn't know Kelly, but he knew that if they gave up, Kelly would never forgive them.

"Riley, it's been almost four hours".

"But that doesn't make four hours. Keep going".

Hermit didn't answered, knowing he wouldn't have the last word. Riley was his chief, so he had to obey.

"Well... No choice: we go to the max".

One of the nurse put her eyes on Dr. Hermit then Riley.

"If we do this, he may die".

"And if we do nothing, he's dead. You have other options in your head?"

The nurse stodd there speechless. She shook her head side to side and helped the neurosurgeon to increase the intensity.

"STOP!"

Everyoneraised their arms, surprised, and looked at the window above them. Dr. Riley had closed his eyes.

"Stop the machine", he said calmly, eyes still closed.

Kelly turned to him, stood up and grabbed him by his shoulder.

"You're giving up?"

Doctor Riley raised his arms and pointed to the glass. One of the nurse and Dr. Hermit had understood what it meant and lowered their arms. Kelly collapsed to the ground, crying hardly, hitting everything that was in his vision, ready to break his hand if needed. Dr. Riley couldn't say anything for a while, then he grabbed the microphone and talked to Hermit.

"Check his pupils".

The same nurse took her penlight and opened his eyes, Matt's eyes. She took a minute and then...

"Weak reaction!"

Kelly opened his eyes filled with tears and looked the sharp smile on the face of the neurosurgeon.

"You didn't give me the time to explain. But he had a weak brain activity. Weak, but there".

Kelly closed his eyes again, ready to burst. Not into sadness, not into anger. But ready to burst into joy. His little brother that he loved so much, came back in he land of the living. Finally. He began to cry once again, clutching Shay in his arms, the biggest hug he could offer. He was relieved.


	9. You can cry

Hello everyone! I hope you're going good after christmas. I wrote two more chapters for GTT and another one is in progress. So... Enjoy?

* * *

 **CHAPTER 8: You can cry**

At the firehouse 51, all the firemen of the second shift were here. All except Matt, Gabby and Kelly. Chief Boden had given him the time he needed to stay with Matt, and he was very thankful about it. But for now, Matt was in a coma and was going to stay in it the time to recover, and he didn't want to sit next to him, ready to go crazy. He needed to stay buzy. Having been informed about the accident of her little brother, Christie came almost immediately and burst into tears in Kelly's arms. And she almost passed out when she saw Matt in this hospital bed, hooked up to numerous machines. In the absence of Kelly, she proposed to watch over him. This was for this reason that Kelly was late for his shift, because he needed to return to his appartment and grab his stuffs.

« Hello chief », Kelly started immediately after his arriving. « I'm sorry, I'm late ».

« It's nothing Kelly. Go prepare yourself before having a call ».

Kelly nodded and went to the locker's room while Boden followed him with his eyes. He didn't want to ask how he was, because he knew that obviously he wasn't fine, and that he needed to think about something else in hope to get better. During this time, Kelly was changing as fast as possible before joining his team. Shay, who knew he was there, entered the room and approached.

« Hey ».

Kelly closed his locker and feigned a smile.

« Hey ».

Shay looked at him from head to toe.

« You hadn't slept, uh? »

Kelly closed his eyes and shook his head.

« I can't sleep. I can't do it ».

He sat on the bench, and Shay did the same soon after.

« When Matt will wake up, he will need you with all your strength. You have to sleep. For him ».

Shay had always the right words to cheer him.

« I... I know you're right, but... But every time I close my eyes, I see him again under this car, bleeding to death or... Or on this damn table ».

Thinking about all this, Kelly closed his eyes. But he saw again and again these traumatic images.

« I know it's hard Kelly, but you still have to sleep. Even a little, you need it ».

She took his hand and squeezed it to show her support. In the common room, Hermann was sitting on one of the chairs, totally still. This worried his team and the other firefighters of the firehouse, and even more the chief.

« Hermann? »

He shook his head slightly, and looked Boden.

« Yes chief? »

« Are you sure you're okay? »

« I will be fine when my lieutenant will be out of the wood and will get back to work ».

Then everybody had the same reaction : keep their mouth shut. Nobody wanted to say this: ''IF he could get back to work one day''. Knowing this forbidden sentance, Hermann closed his eyes and sighed.

« I know what you're thinking chief ».

« I don't have a choice Hermann ».

« Got it ».

He knew he had to take the place of lieutenant. At least the time for Matt to recover and come back, if he could. He jumped, got out of his thoughts when he felt a hand on his left shoulder.

« We'll be here to help you if you need it. You're not alone. We're here, together ».

Cruz was trying to make him feel better. He was soon joined by the other firefighters. Then Shay and Kelly.

« How is Matt? »

Kelly put his hands in his pockets and sighed.

« Stable. He's slightly going better. Christie is with him while I'm on shift and she'll call me if anything happens ».

« And Gabby? »

This time, Shay spoke.

« Stable too. She's regaining strength. If all goes well, within one or two days, the doctors will reduce sedation to let her wake on her own ».

Shay frowned and turned to the chief.

« By the way chief, who replaces Dawson? »

« I asked the headquarters to affect someone else temporarely today. Meanwhile, Mills ? »

He jumped up and stood up, surprised.

« Yes chief? »

« Can you stay in the ambo the time for the replacement to come? »

« No problem chief ».

On this last sentance, the bell rang : structure fire.

At Chicago Med, Christie couldn't take her eyes off her little brother. She barely had time to come to terms with him and she had almost lost him. She barely had time to speak with Kelly, much less with a doctor or a nurse. So she didn't know the extent of his injuries, and this was frustrating. She had to wait another ten minutes before a nurse could come inside to check on Matt. But something bothered her. Wanting to be sure that everything was alright, she pushed the nurse button. She took his free hand and squeezed it, cuddling it the time for a nurse to come. Several seconds later, the door opened, revealing a young nurse.

« You pressed the nurse button? »

« Uh... Yeah... I'm worried ».

The nurse used to see Kelly, but had never seen this woman.

« And you are? »

« Christie. I'm Matt's sister ».

The nurse smiled and approached.

« What can I do for you ? »

« Well, uh... I don't know anything about his injuries, so I don't know if it's normal, but he seems feverish ».

The nurse frowned, approached the bed, took her thermometer and took his temperature. 100.

« Indeed, he's a little. I'll call his doctor. He will explain everything ».

She paged Dr. Riley and stayed in the room to take his vitals, note them on the files and check his bandages.

« If I can make you feel better, it's common to develop a slight fever after major surgery. But as I said, the doctor will give you more details ».

She just had time to finish this phrase the doctor entered the room. Surprised to not see Kelly, he approached the young lady carefully.

« Dr. Riley, meet Christie, Matt's sister ».

« Ah, hello ma'm », he said shaking her hand.

He turned to the nurse.

« You've paged me? »

« Yes. He has a slight fever, and Christie would like some informations about her brother ».

« I see ».

He approached the bed and checked what could cause this fever.

« It's quite usual to have a mild fever after brain urgery, or heart surgery. And in his case, both ».

He removed the bandages from his right side. Christie let out a cry of horror.

« Mh... He has a rash around the wound ».

He turned his head to Christie.

« Do you know if he has some allergies to medication, antiseptic or even some sort of bandage? »

« Well, younger he had some troubles with antiseptics. He developed a rash, redness and a slight fever. This is what causes the fever? »

« Seems to be. Emily can you bring the special creme? »

« Got it ».

The nurse left the room.

« This creme is made for tpeople who don't tolerate antiseptics. And it has the same properties as our other cremes. With this, his fever should go down in around an hour or so ».

« And... And his other injuries? Kelly didn't tell me anything ».

« Well, I will take the time needed to explain and try to reassure you ».

The doctor sat on a chair near Christie.

« Did Kellyexplain to you why he is here? »

« He told me it was a car accident. But nothing else ».

« Okay ».

The docotr didn't know how to tell her why he was in this shape. But he had no choice.

« Matt was hit by a car at full speed, and dragged to the ground by this same car for about 330 fts before stopping his course under a car ».

Christie let out a gasp, ran her hands over her mouth at the same time and closed her eyes to cry. The doctor wanted to continue, but he let to Christie some time to digest the news. Apparently, she didn't even know that.

« Your brother was brought here with an aortic rupture, the main artery in the human body that distributes oxygenated blood to all parts of the body through the system. This rupture caused a massive hemothorax. His left lung was punctured and his diaphragm ruptured. He has numerous fractured and cracked bones, and a swelling in his brain ».

The more the doctor talked, the more Christie had tears on her eyes then streaming down her cheeks. But Riley hadn't finished his explanations.

« He had two brain surgeries. The first one had consisted to remove the bleeding and the pressure. But soon after, the bleeding had returned and was more important. We had to drain the blood and the swelling and stopped the bleeding. He scared us when his brain activity has stopped ».

« WHAT? »

Christie didn't know how to take the news. Knowing that her brother was dead for a while, but on the other side, knowing that her brother had survived... She didn't know.

« For three hours, his brain didn't work. With Kelly's aproval, we realized a 'last chance' operation. It's still experimental but every time we try, it's more effective ».

« And what is the aim? »

« According to recent research, people with no brain activities continues to have an almost imperceptible activity. The aim of this operation is to implant some sensors on his hyppocampus to capture these brain waves, amplify them and spread them to restart the brain. I simplified, it's much more complicated ».

« And uh... And it works? »

« At first, we failed every time, but the last two years, we have a 100% success rate. Our biggest problem is that we need the patient to wake up to see the damage ».

« Damage? And... And there are always damage? »

« Always, but it depends on the intensity of the process. The higher the intensity, the more the damage are numerous and huge. But as I said, this method is improving every day ».

« And Matt? »

« Well... We have to conduct the trial at full power for the first time. So we don't know. He should have numerous damage, but we don't know for sure. We'll run some tests this afternoon to see where we are ».

Christie swallowed hard. Her little brother would never be the same. Never.

« And... What damage he could have? »

« As I said to Kelly, most of our patients had to relearn the basics: walking, talking, reading... But we noticed that most of them had kept their memory. And I must admit that it's the first time we use this trial on someone who had an injury in the occipital lobe. So we're can't predict the extent of the damage. Maybe he won't have to relearn the basics, but will have some visual defficiencies or... Or problems with his memory. We don't know. As I said, we'll run some tests and we'll wait his awakening ».

Christie nodded. A last question was burning her lips.

« Why he was hit... »

« From what I understood, he wanted to save his girlfriend. She crossed the road and the car couldn't brake. He pushed her to the ground and he was hit. At full speed ».

« Oh my God Gabby! »

She put back her hand over her mouth, ready to cry.

« She... When she got up to rescue Matt, she was hit by another car ».

She closed her eyes, crying again in front of the doctor.

« She's okay ? I mean... Uh... »

« She's at Lakeshore. I heard Kelly and one of his friend talk about her. I think they talked about a spleen exploded and a damaged vestibular system. But if you want more information, you can call Lakoshore, or even Kelly. He will know more than me ».

Doctor Riley put his hand on her left shoulder as a support and then left the room, asking the nurse to monitor his fever. Christie grabbed her phone and called Kelly, who immediately picked up.

« Christie ? What is it, there's a problem ? »

She didn't answer, she was just crying. She couldn't answer.

« I'll be there in five minutes ».

Kelly was reallyy anxious. He had asked Christie to call for any problems and hear her crying like this... This wasn't good, not good at all. He asked Tony to drive to Chicago Med as fast as he could. He entered the hospital six minutes later, and went to Matt's room in CCU soon after. And he just saw Christie on a chair, crying out loud, her head on her arms. He approached the bed, saw that Matt hadn't move. He let out a sigh of relief then began to squeeze her right shoulder.

« Christie... »

But she continued to cry. So he knelt in front of her and raised her head. Her eyes were red, full of tears. She saw that Kelly had been in a fire not long time ago. He was full of dust, his clothes were dirty and we was still wearing his gear.

« What happened? », he asked carefully.

Christie stopped crying, and inhaled deeply, trying to stay calm.

« The doctor told me what happened with full details ».

Kelly wanted to talk, but eveything stopping him : the hiss of the ventilator, her look full of anger, his own feelings...

« I... Couldn't talk about this. I... Freed him from under the car, I saw him in that damn operating room when he had no brain activity, and... And I couldn't talk about this. I couldn't, not to you... »

He closed his eyes, ready to cry too. Christie looked at him, knelt on the ground in front of him and hugged him. Kelly also had gone trough hell, saw everything, saw her little brother injured and being rescrued.

« I can't tell you that I know what you went through, but what I know is that you were here for him when I couldn't ».

He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her too. They stayed like this for a few minutes. She wiped her tears and looked at Kelly.

« How is Gabby? »

Kelly sighed, closing his eyes.

« She was hit by another car when she wanted to rescue Matt. Her right vestibular system is damaged, she had a punctured lung, her spleen exploded and she had a swelling in her inner ear ».

« M-meaning? »

« Meaning... »

Kelly opened his eyes and decided to face Christie.

« Meaning that she'll have to relearn to walk ».

Christie felt bad for her. She didn't know her well, but Matt loved her. And this meant everything.

« Somebody is with her ? »

« Her brother. He doesn't want to leave her ».

« And he knows about Matt ? »

« Yeah, his unit is stil trying to find the car and the man or woman who did this to her ».

« And the one who hit Matt? »

« He... He is really in shock. Antonio told me he went to her room to apologize and to see how she was. He described the car that hit Gabby and uh... And he would pay as much as he can the health care of Matt and his hospitalization ».

Christie was in shock. So the man who did this to her little brother was sorry and didn't want to hit him.

« Why he didn't brake ? »

« We don't know. Someone is checking why they didn't work. Nolan thinks it's a design flaw. The car went out of the seller ».

« Nolan ? »

« Uh... T-the man who hit him ».

« He came here ? »

« No, he's still at Lakeshore. He was seriously shocked and... And has a head injury so they want to keep him for a day or two, just in case ».

Christie nodded. A phone rang, and startled Kelly and her. He grabbed his phone and picked up.

« Hey Antonio, how are you ? »

« _Uh... Good, I think. I don't know. Uh... I just... Wanted some news_ ».

« Oh... Uh... Matt is uh... I don't know. Christie ? »

Christie, who was looking Matt, turned her head to Kelly, and took the phone he handed to her.

« Hello ? »

« _You're... Matt's sister right ?_ »

« Yes. And you're Gabby's brother ».

Antonio and Christie swallowed at the same time.

« _How is Matt ?_ »

« Uh... The nurse will pass soon to check on him because he's developping a slight fever, but apparently it's very common after a... Brain surgery or heart surgery. But I think he's good. And Gabby ? »

« _Uh... I... The doctor told me she's good, that in two days they will reduce sedation to let her wake on her own. And uh... You... You know about Matt ?_ »

« Not really. They put him in a coma the time for him to heal properly and let his body rest and before decreasing sedation. I think. I'm not a doctor but uh... I think this is it ».

Kelly nodded to Christie so she could know that her explanation was good, and soon after, he signed to her that he had to go because he was on shift.

« Kelly has to go. He's on shift and he needs to go back to the firehouse ».

« _… Okay. I'll call Chicago Med if I want news_ ».

« And I'll do the same for Gabby. Goodbye ».

« _Goodbye_ ».

She hung up and handed his phone to Kelly.

« I'm sorry Christie. I really have to go. I shouldn't be here on shift ».

« No, it's me. I... Cried on the phone so you had to come here. I'll call you soon when the nurse will check on him ».

« Yeah, thanks ».

He kissed her cheek and left the room, leaving her alone with her brother. She took his free hand and cuddled it again. She wanted him to know he wasn't alone in this room.


	10. Withdrawal

Hello everyone! for the majorit of you, you'll see in a few hours this 3-way crossover! So I wanted to post this chapter so you can read it before this #OneChicago.

Enjoy!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 9: Withdrawal**

Nine days passed, nine days of waiting for Kelly. Nine long days of anxiety in this hospital room of Chicago Med. Nine days that doctors and nurses were making comings and goings near Matt, to check if everything was okay, if he was becoming stronger, they were running some tests. To reassure him, Kelly Severide, best friend and brother of this form laying still and comatose, inert in this bed. He was missing Matt. He saw him every day when he could, he was missing his voice, making jokes and pranks with him, it tortured him to tell himself that Matt will probably never be the same. They got through many things together: the firefighter Academy, the reunion on the field, their promotion of lieutenant, their transfer in the same firehouse than their third brother, the loss of this third brother, the death of Hallie, his head injury and this time this accident. So many things he wanted to forget for the majority. The part after the death of Andy. He wanted so many to coma back in time. Lost in his thoughts, he didn't hear Riley enter the room and talk to him.

Kelly?"

Finally jumping up, he looked the room hurrily. His gaze locked on the bed, on Matt, then the doctor, standing on the other side of the bed.

"What?"

Doctor Riley continued to examine Matt, looking at the screens encircling the bed, then smiled.

"Matt is going better, as I can see. His vitals are stable since three days in a suitable level, his fever is down, his brain activity is becoming stronger, as well as his heart. With your permission, I would like to begin to decrease sedation slowly and carefully to wake him up".

Kelly opened his mouth, wanting to say something, but no word, no sound came out. His heart was dealing with two completely opposite emotions: joy and fear.

"Uh... It's uh... Not too soon?" Kelly asked hesitating.

"To tell the truth, he is good. With the type of cerebral operation he had, we keep the patient around three days in a coma. And it's the same case for a major heart surgery. And nine days passed since the operation because he wasn't enough stable for us, but I think he is stable enough to try".

Kelly wasn't reassured by this explanation. And the doctor saw this.

"I wouldn't propose this if I didn't think he couldn't do it. I sincerely think he can do it. Trust me".

Kelly frowned.

"The last time I trusted you, Matt almost didn't survive".

"It's a random risk Kelly. And I'm sorry about this. This time, the risk is much lower".

"But it's still a random risk".

"And we can't control these risks, but we can prevent them".

Kelly closed his eyes and sighed deeply while passing his hands on his face.

"What are the risks of waking him up?"

"The most common are pain, provocking an increasing BP and heart rate. If the pain is too much to bear, we'll sedate him again. In his case, he might fight the ET tube, but he needs it for a few more days because of his diaphragmatic rupture, the collapsed lung and the hemothorax".

"I know Matt, he will find a way to pull it out. When he had this head injury a couple months ago, he woke up with the ventilator. We told him he needed it for a few more hours, nurses almost attached him so he couldn't touch the tube and the ventilator".

"The main advantage, if we can say that, it's he will be too weak to fight it the first hours, I hope".

Kelly let escape a smile.

"It won't stop him. But uh... You really think it's time?"

"Keeping him in an induced coma too long will stress him, make him feel lost, and this isn't good for his body".

He nodded, then approached the bed. He tooked his left hand in his, and pressed it.

"You... Said he will suffer?"

"When we put someone in a coma, it's to avoid the pain mainly. So when the patient is waking up, it's logical to feel pain, but when he is awake, we can optimally regulate the pain meds, so we can ease the pain".

Kelly didn't hide his concern and his fear. He didn't want to see his borther in pain. But on the other side, the more they were waiting...

"How many time before his awakening?"

"In his case, we'll decrease sedation step by step. If everything is going fine, in two days, he will be awake, groggy and mainly asleep, but awake".

He bit his lips, thinking about what he had to do.

"Okay. Do what you want".

The doctor touched one of the machines, then smiled.

"A nurse will come to take his vitals. I programmed this machine to decrease sedation by itself. If something is wrong, we'll push this button so the decreasing sedation will stop".

Giving him a last smile, the doctor left the room, letting Kelly alone with Matt. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed Shay's number. He knew she was with Antonio at Lakeshore, in her room, Gabby's.

* * *

 **Lakeshore, three days after surgery, flashback.**

At Lakeshore, doctors held a speech about Gabby: they wanted to decrease the sedation to see her reaction and let her wake in her rhythm. Antonio didn't hesitate a second before accepting the process.

"It's a good thing Antonio", Shay assured smiling.

"Yeah".

Antonio feigned a smile. He was really tired, exhausted by these last days. Shay put her left hand on his right shoulder so he could look at her.

"I know you don't want to leave Gabby, but you should rest and sleep a little. I'll stay here the time you need. She will need her brother, not a zombie!"

At least, this made Antonio laugh. He passed his hand on his eyes.

"I think this time, I will hear your advice. I will eat, take a shower and sleep for hours".

He began to stand up when Shay's phone rang. Reading Kelly's name, she smiled.

"Kelly? You have good news?"

"Uh... Not really".

Kelly stopped a second, and continued with a smile on his face.

"Riley wanted to withdraw sedation. He wanted to do this carefully to avoid too much stress on his body, mainly his brain and his heart. But uh... He isn't stable and his fever doesn't want to go down".

Shay, who put Kelly on a speaker, stood up hurrily, opening her mouth, astonished.

"Oh my God!"

Shay knew what Matt got through these past few days, she had been with Kelly when his brain activity restart, almost in time before being permanently brain dead. But Shay was worried.

"But Riley thinks that waiting too long will stress his body and lost him. So more problems than good things".

As a paramedic, she understood the point of vue of the doctor and knew they had to trust him.

"The doctor just said something about Dawson".

She waited a reaction through the phone.

"What?"

Kelly was confused, totally lost.

"He wants to begin to drop the sedation to let her wake by her own, slowly and without too much stress".

"Oah, uh... This a good thing then. Gabby will be awake in a few days and we'll know if... If the accident let some damage, physically and mentally".

"Yeah. But for now, we need to focus on their awakening, so damage later okay?"

Kelly didn't talk for a second.

"You're right Shay. Focussing on their awakening, and we'll see later".

"You keep me updated okay?"

"Yeah, you too?"

"I will".

She hung up with a smile on her face. Matt and Gabby faced hell, but she was getting better enough to put her out of their coma. Finally, they will have their friends with them again.

 **End of flashback**

* * *

A day passed and doctor Riley lowered the sedation in a half way, keeping Matt in a coma. His vitals were increasing in a regular rhythm: his heartbeat was stronger and faster, his BP was stabilized at 11 over 8, 'an acceptable blood pressure' according to Riley after the trauma he suffered.

"We need to run more tests when he will be awake, espacially cerebral tests. His pupils are reacting well, and he seems to not have visual problems. But as I'm saying, we need to wait his awakening".

"When he will begin to wake?"

"Not too long. Look".

The doctor pointed Matt's eyes. His eyelids were closed, but his eyes were moving.

"He is beginning to show sign of consciousness".

Kelly was hit by asthonishment.

"He... He can hear us?"

"It's a high probability yes!" Riley confirmed with a smile.

Kelly was straight in his chair and took instinctively Matt's left hand while smiling.

"I will let you, I have other patients to see. Push the nurse button if there are changes".

Passing near him, doctor Riley tapped friendly his shoulder and left the room. A huge tension left Kelly. He didn't slept but a few hours these past few days, he felt tiredness invaded him slowly. Still with his brother's hand on his, he squeezed it stronger and put his head on the bed.

"I'm happy. To know that soon, I will have my brother again".

He smiled a last time before falling asleep slowly, falling in a dream world he didn't see for a long time.

During the following hours, nurses came again and again to take Matt's vitals, while making the least noise to not wake Kelly up, who was sleeping peacefully for the first time in days. Knowing he didn't eat either, they prepared a trash full of food so he could gain strengh. Four hours after falling asleep, Kelly woke up suddenly. He had felt a little pinch on his hand and it had been enough to wake him up. He looked his own hand, this one that was holding his brother's hand. It was moving slightly. He straightened, and while he was waking up, he took a serious look.

"Matt? Come on sleepy head, it's time to open your eyes".

He squeezed his hand stronger and waited a reaction from Matt. He could see his eyes moving more than before his nap, he saw Matt begin to frown.

"Open your eyes Matt. Come on bud', open your eyes".

Slowly, his eyes opened. Without waiting Kelly smiled and pushed the nurse button. His hand squeezed Matt's hand harder. After a minute, a nurse came in the room. Seeing the smile on his face, she approached the bed.

"He... He just opened his eyes".

The nurse ran to this bed. She took her penlight and pointed it in the level of Matt's eyes. He closed them almost immediately, frowning again.

"I will find the doctor".

"No! No..."

The nurse stopped, turning to Kelly. She wanted to ask him why but she didn't have the time.

"Let him regain strengh. It will ease his work".

The nurse took the time to answer. She looked Matt, paralyzed in this bed, asleep already. She nodded.

"You're right".

She pointed at the tray behind Kelly.

"We prepared you a cold meal. You also need to regain strengh. For your brother".

He turned and saw the tray, containing two homemade ham sandwishes, a salad, a banana and a bottle of water. He smiled and turned to the nurse.

"Thank you... Emily", he said reading her badge.

She smiled and left the room. Kelly turned to Matt, squeezed his hand and smiled.

"I know you enough to know that you closed your eyes to not be bothered. Open your little eyes for your big brother".

Almost immediately after, Matt reopened his eyes and locked them on Kelly. He moved slightly his head left to right, painfully. His heartbeat was increasing regularly, and Kelly understood why.

"If you don't want to see the nurse, you need to stay calm. This tube is here to help you, you can't breathe for now".

But Matt was still fighting the tube. Kelly sighed, tightening his hand.

"I promise that soon, it won't be here anymore. But for now, you need to gain strengh, and to do this, you need to stop fighting the respirator".

Matt still wanted to fight it, to fight the tube invading his throat. But he didn't have the strengh anymore. He gave up, closing his eyes immediately. He let escape a little tear that came down his cheek. He felt his brother passed his finger on this cheek to wipe it.

"I know it's hard, but you need to rest. Close your eyes, and sleep for now. We'll have time later".

Matt was feeling good with this voice. This voice that deep down, he knew it. He felt himself drift to sleep, his brother's hand caressing his hand. Seeing his heartbeat dropping, Kelly was satisfied.

"That's it. Get back to sleep".

The same nurse came back in the room, slowly.

"I saw his heartbeat increased on the computer".

"All good. He fought the ventilator, but he fell asleep again", Kelly whispered.

She smiled and approached the bed, wanting to know if the breathing tube moved, but this wasn't the case.

"How much time he will keep it? The ventilator I mean".

"It depends on him and the doctor. My opinion, at least another day, the time for him to be out of sedation".

Kelly nodded, but stayed worried.

"I know him, each time he will wake up, he will fight the ventilator".

"I think that doctor Riley can approve something on him. I will page him and see".

She left the room and called the doctor. He arrived almost immediately.

"He is awake?"

"Barely. But it's not why I paged you".

Riley put his hands on his hips and frowned.

"He's fighting the tube and Mr. Severide assured he will each time he will be awake".

The doctor opened the door of the room znd approached the bed.

"Doc?" Kelly said whispering and surprised.

He said nothing, looking at the screens one by one and stopped on one of them.

"This is why I paged you".

Kelly didn't understand.

"What is it?"

"Your brother Matt has pulmonary reflex", Riley confirmed.

"And... And it's a good thing?"

"This is one of the reasons he's fighting the tube".

Riley stopped the sedation.

"What are you doing?"

"He is awake enough to fight the respirator, so I stopped the sedation. It can be abrupt, but he is healing faster than I thought".

"What?"

Surprised, Kelly stood up. Riley lifted his hands up and turned to Kelly.

"He shouldn't have these reflex. Not so soon after the surgery. The only way to find a solution, so not stress him, is to wake him up fully".

Kelly struggled to understand the doctor.

"Doctor? His heartbeat is increasing".

"Alright. Can you bring the material?"

"On it".

Emily left the room while Kelly is beginning to panic.

"I have two solutions and Matt has to chose. Either we remove the ventilator and he will try to breathe on his own, or we let it in place but we start a program so he can breathe with the ventilator".

Kelly wanted to talk and opened his mouth, but asthonishment invaved him and avoided him to speak. He got out of his shape because of a pinch on his hand. Matt was reopening his eyes. The nurse came back with a cart and the material needed for the extubation.

"Hello!"

Matt had fully opened his eyes, and turned to Kelly who smiled.

"Listen to the doctor. He has things to say".

He passed his eyes toward Riley and frowned. Then he began to fight the tube again.

"That's why I'm here. I have two solutions, but for now, I need you to stop to fight and stay calm".

Matt took several seconds before stopping to fight. His heartrate began to drop slowly.

"Here we go. As I said, I have two solutions. Either I will remove the tube and let your breathe alone but your body will be stressed. Or I let it but I let you breathe with the respirator; and it will help your body to heal properly and gain strengh. You understand?"

Matt stayed still, eyes opened. Riley frowned.

"Blink once if you can hear me".

Four seconds later, relief invaved the doctor when he saw Matt blinking once.

"Doc?" Kelly called him. "What is it?"

"He is still too groggy to understand completely what we are saying. We leave him to wake up, he will sleep a few hours and then we'll come back".

Kelly nodded and turned to Matt.

"Go back to sleep and keep gain strengh. You'll need this".

Matt tried to nod, but he couldn't. He closed his eyes and got back to sleep peacefully, while the doctor frowned.

"Is there a problem?" Kelly asked.

"I don't know yet. We'll see when he'll be fully awake, but I think he's just too groggy. We'll run tests to know if there are damages from the brain dead and the bleeding. And we'll see after this".


	11. SVM

Hello everyone! I hope you're up for a new chapter haha

I think you will like it. I wanted to thank you for the reviews you let (my 45th for this story!) and I'm glad because my english is improving every day!

Enjoy this new chapter !

* * *

 **CHAPTER 10: SMV**

Matt woke up again with this damn breathing tube in his throat. Deep down, he knew it was here for a good reason, but everything was a blurr in his head. He tried to open his eyes for the umpteenth time, fighting to not close them because of the sunlight. Well, from what he could see. His sister Christie and Kelly were here near him, asleep or battling strongly against this sleepy. He turned his head to see better, but it didn't help at all. He was even more dazzled than before, and he heard himself make a sound, resuming his former position, which fully awoke Kelly.

"Hey..."

He feigned a smile while blinking and frowning, wanting to make him understand that this light that was arriving on him was bothering him.

"It's the light, isn't it?"

He didn't have time to nod, Kelly stood up discreetly to turn off the light and close the blinds. Matt's face relaxed almost immediately.

"Better uh?"

Kelly siad this ironically, he knew it was better for Matt. He tried to whisper to not wake Christie, but it was too late: this change of light in the room and the fact she couldn't feel the sun's heat anymore made her come out of her dreams. Opening her eyes, she saw for the first time her little brother awake. She didn't have words, but her relief was really high, and this made her cry. She didn't see it, but Matt was crying too.

"Matt? It hurts?" Kelly asked.

Matt closed his eyes, letting the tears streaming down his cheeks, and Kelly didn't understand why. Christie had reacted to the question by opening her eyes again and wiping the tears of her little brother.

"Matt, don't cry... I don't like when you're crying".

He didn't answer the question, and Kelly didn't know what to do. Should he call the doctor, the nurse, or nothing? Doubting and wanting to do the right thing, he pushed the nurse button so Emily could come. In thirty seconds she was here, ready to turn the light on;

"No, stop", Kelly explained, interrumpting Emily. "The light is making him dizzy".

The nurse nodded, explaining that after a brain surgery, photosensitivity could occur.

"There is a problem?"

"Well, I don't know, and I want to be sure. He... Look by yourself".

He pointed Matt, and Emily followed his finger. She saw that Matt was crying despite the fact that Christie was wiping them. She approached and made sure that Matt opened his eyes.

"You hurt?"

But Matt didn't respond, he seemed totally lost. He plunged his gaze in the nurse's, lost and slightly frightened. She checked his vitals and all the machines around the bed.

"Nothing indicates any pain despite the fact that we are lowering his dose of morphine. Matt? There is a problem?"

But again, he said nothing, there was no movement, he remained motionless, just staring. Unable to speak, no one could know what Matt really meant. The nurse stopped to the screen of the ventilator.

"Ah, I think I found the problem".

Kelly startled, surprised.

"So what is it?"

"He's trying to breathe on his own. That's what's happening".

Kelly opened his mouth. He absolutely didn't think about it. Christie, who held one of Matt's hands, felt his hand tighten as if there was a pressure exerted on it. She looked at her brother as he tried to nod.

"I think it is. He just shook my hand and... And he tried to nod".

"I'll call doctor Riley to discuss with him. I think we can try something. I can't do anything alone".

"You can do something?"

"Yes, I am a former anesthesiologist, so I'm allowed to deal with the ventilator. But always with the doctor's approval".

She paged the doctor while Kelly and Christie reunited all the pieces of the puzzle.

"You really want to do what? Because I didn't quite understand well".

"It's me who can tell whether a patient can breathe without a ventilator, what is the best option for him, etc..."

The door opened, revealing Matt's doctor.

"I see that our man is awake!"

He watched his patient carefully.

"And scared...", he added.

"Because this gentleman here is trying to breathe on his own. I would like with your permission, to move him from the AC mode to the IS mode".

"You want to decrease its dependence of the ventilator? Already?"

"It could probably help him get better".

Emily began to speak lower, almost whispering.

"And no offense, it's been ten days. His wounds have had time to heal a minimum. If we don't, he will fight the tube again, causing stress on his body and could be worse than move him to IS".

The nurse stood up to the doctor. After all, she was the expert here. He looked one last time Matt, totally lost and beginning to fight against the respirator.

"Alright. Do whatever it takes".

He left almost immediately, almost slamming the door while Emily smiled and sighed at the same time.

"What is happening?"

"Dr. Riley doesn't like to be contradicted. But ICU is my specialty. There are some things he doesn't know about mechanical ventilation".

"Like?"

"Like the fact that with a ventilator, you can breathe on your own".

Kelly's face suddenly showed astonishment.

"How?"

"Well, it depends of the patient, but we have created a new ventilation mode. This is called 'smart ventilation mode' or SVM, the time to find a proper name. This helps the patient to quickly no longer have a respirator".

"And how does it work?"

"This mode takes into account all parameters, and according to these, the respirator fits the patient's effort. We try it increasingly in ICU and patients seem to tolerate it better than any other ventilation mode. The aim is simple: Matt initiates inspiration, and according to his effort and his vitals, the ventilator can help him to take a full breath, let him breathe normally or take his place completely. As I said, a smart ventilation. When I shall think it's time I'll put the second level of this mode, consisting to allow the patient to breathe on his own, and if he stops breathing or if his vitals are passed below the minimum level, the respirator takes again its initial role until the patient breathes again".

"So... Matt should 't fight the tube anymore?"

"There is only one way to find out: try".

Kelly nodded, turning to Matt and Christie. She didn't understand everything, but she trusted Emily.

""Matt? When I say so, you can breathe, okay?"

The frown on his face faded, and he shook his head slightly. Emily tapped several buttons on the screen and asked Matt to take a breath.

"Come on now. Try!"

Matt frowned, absolutely not sure what he should do.

"he doesn't seem to understand... Mh... Ah! Matt? Act like you want to fight this tube down your throat".

Matt obeyed and began to fight. But he was seized with astonishment, finding no resistance and breathing on his own. He quickly took a few inhalations and exhalations, closing his eyes and letting emotion invading him. He could breathe without any problem. Emily smiled, seeing the relief appear on Matt's face. And seeing tears appear in the corner of his eyes.

"Well done Matt. Just like that!"

Kelly was stunned. He didn't understand everything, but he was there, mouth opened, staring with insistence at Matt.

"What did you do Emily?"

"I told you: smart ventilation! Basically, it's like you're breathing normally, but with a ventilator".

Kelly understood better what happened: Matt was breathing without any problems, almost totally free.

"Matt? You can open your eyes for me?"

He opened them, leaving the tears flow.

"It's better now?"

He nodded his head up and down, dropping the hand of Christie to move a little. He got it up to put it in his chin and then away to Emily, the palm of his hand always turned to him. Emily smiled again.

"You're welcome".

Kelly frowned a little.

"What?"

"Kelly, the movement he did is sign language, ASL. He just said 'thank you'".

Kelly blocked his gaze on Matt. He learned every day with him.

"Christie? You knew he could speak in ASL?"

"Our grandfather was almost deaf, and he often used to communicate in sign language. So Matt and I have learned".

"So... He can talk?"

"This language is used mainly with both hands and facial expressions. SO his communication is limited, but yes".

"The doctor will be happy: Now we know that his long-term memory and part of its mobility are intact. You can try to speak your brother Christie".

She turned again to Matt, clearing his voice.

"Hello!"

 _ **Hello!**_

His movements were very slow, but he could still communicate with his left arm, even if it was very sore because of the lack of skin.

"It's not hurting you?"

 _ **A little, but it's okay for now.**_

"And... You're breathing properly?"

 _ **Better than nothing. When it will be out?**_

She turned to the nurse.

"He asks when he will be out of the respirator".

"In a very short time. Hopefully by tomorrow or after tomorrow. We need to help your lungs to breathe spontaneously again".

Matt started talking again in sign language with his sister.

 _ **I didn't understand anything.**_

"You have to get used to breathe on your own".

 _ **Just for that?**_

"Doctors, you know them, right?"

Kelly could see a smile on Matt's face. But his expression changed quickly.

 _ **Why are you there?**_

"I came to see my little brother. Mom will come soon to see you".

Matt immediately frowned.

 _ **What?**_

"What 'what'?"

 _ **Christie... Mom is in jail.**_

Christie opened her mouth to continue the conversation, but no sound, no words came out. Something was wrong. And the nurse seemed too novice to understand what Matt had said. She decided to talk to him with sign language.

 _ **Matt... Mom is no longer in jail. It's been over a year.**_

Matt shook his head more and more violently. Signing at once.

 _ **No impossible! You never wanted it!**_

 _ **Matt calm down please!**_

"There is a problem Christie?"

Startled, she turned to face Kelly.

"I think so. Just wait a second".

She turned again.

 _ **Matt, what's the last thing you remember? The date I mean.**_

Matt had trouble understanding why she asked that.

 _ **Tell me Matt, please. It is important.**_

 _ **The last thing?**_

 _ **Yes. If you remember the date.**_

Matt was thinking, trying to gather all his memories.

 _ **I remember this car arriving at full speed. It was... April. 16th.**_

 _ **And the year?**_

 _ **I think it was... 2005.**_

Christie let out a cry of horror, and blocked her hands on his hand and letting out tears.

 _ **What is it?**_

 _ **Matt... It's April 19th, but we're in 2014.**_

Matt's eyes widened and he shook his head, closing his eyes and crying.

"What happened Christie!"

"Matt... Uh... The last thing he remembers dated on April 2005".


	12. April 2005

I wanted to reply to everyone at the same time, so there will be no problem: as you know, I am French and English is not my first language, far from it. Before June 2015, I didn't speak english at all, I couldn't hold a conversation, I couldn't write or listening, speaking in english, nothing. I improved my english thanks to these fanfictions and friends, who help me as they can. I know I still make many mistakes, but for me, writing fanfictions is my way to learn english. Before that, I was using translation sites, today I only use my words and I'm still learning every day. I just wanted to ask you to be kind to me, or any fictioners that are making some mistakes in their chapters and whose native language isn't english. End of rant (this wasn't a yell but you get the idea).

I still hope that despite my mistakes you'll enjoy this chapter that I wrote with love and passion (and some 'I'll be AGAIN the devil itself'), and that you will leave me a review to tell me what you thought :)

Thank you very much for reading me!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 11: April 2005**

Matt was in total panic, and they could hear this by the accelerated rhythm of the respirator, but also his heart monitor. His sister felt bad for him. He began to sign again, tears in his eyes.

 _ **What's going on ?**_

"Emily?"

The nurse almost jumped, focused on Matt. Christie didn't know what to say to his brother.

"Yes?"

"He's aking what's going on... And I don't know what to say..."

She burst into tears again in Kelly's arms, while the nurse approached Matt softly.

"You had an accident Matt. It did a lot of damage to your body, especially your brain. Your memory will come back soon, don't worry."

She smiled at him, although she didn't want to. Slowly but surely, Matt's heart rate lowered, and his breathing steadied.

 _ **What happened to me?**_

Emily turned to Christie, requesting translation.

"He's asking what happened to him."

She nodded and turned back to Matt, smiling to try to calm him down.

"You had a car accident. You've opted to save your girlfriend, but it was you who was hit by the car.''

Matt looked at the ceiling, trying to sort through his memories.

 _ **In my memory, it's Andy who has been hit.**_

"He says that in his memory, it's not him but Andy who has been hit."

"Oh my God..."

Everyone turned to Kelly. He had passed his hand over his mouth.

"What is Kelly?"

He opened his mouth, unable to speak for several seconds.

"April 16th, 2005. This is the day when Andy, our third brother, has been hit by a car when we had been called on a house fire. Matt, this is it? This is your last memory?"

Matt took the time to nod. He had lost his memories on nearly a decade.

 _ **How is Andy?**_ Matt signed, eyes closing dangerously.

"Hey Matt, Rest the time it takes, okay? We'll have this conversation later. You have to regain strength", Christie explained.

He shook his head 'no', but he struggled not to close his eyes. Kelly approached him and patted his right shoulder slightly.

"Don't struggle. Rest, you need it."

Matt didn't have the strength to stay awake anymore. He closed his eyes, plunging into a deep sleep. At the same time, the ventilator sounded briefly. Emily approached the screen to see what was happening.

"He sleeps deeply", the nurse stated.

"And you can say that according to the respirator?"

"He's not breathing on his own and doesn't fight tu tube.''

Kelly opened his mouth but no sound came out.

"He... I should call Shay. She uh... She's at Lakeshore."

"I have to go to work. You keep me updated?'' Christie asked wiping the tears that were streaming down her cheeks.

He nodded, while Emily put her hand on his shoulder.

"Press the button if necessary. I'm on duty until tomorrow morning.''

Christie went out, followed by Emily, who turned abruptly to Kelly.

"And try to get some sleep. You look like a zombie."

She smiled and went out too, leaving him alone with Matt. She was right, he was very tired. Then he laid his head on the sheets near the left hand of Matt, and closed his eyes to sleep...

* * *

Matt opened his eyes again two hours later, almost completely awake. He turned his eyes to Kelly who was sleeping peacefully his head on the bed, snoring slightly. He wanted to smile: he had never heard Kelly snoring. It was a quiet song, invading the space, but peaceful. Not without difficulty, he raised his left arm and placed it on Kelly's head, ruffling his hair affectionately. He heard a groan and the snoring stopped. His head straightened as he rubbed his eyes, and Matt frowned while his left side ached horribly since Kelly had straightened. His heart beat faster, in harmony with the pain. He closed his eyes, squinting and letting out a tear, a tear of pain.

"Hey Matt? You're in pain right?"

He didn't wait for an answer, he knew. He had felt Matt's hand on his hair, and he had risen quite sharply, probably causing this pain he felt. He pressed the button and a minute later, Emily came into the room.

"We can not ease the pain? He is in pain right now."

"Unfortunately he is already at the maximum level of painkillers."

The nurse felt bad for Matt. She couldn't give him more painkillers. She came up with an idea in mind. She looked into the cart next to the bedroom door, then came back when she found what she wanted.

" What is it?" Kelly asked.

"I presume he moved his left arm? Since it's no longer in its place."

"Yes, he... He woke me up. Why ?"

"Some days ago when he had that little infection in the arm..."

"Yes, so?"

"It takes time to heal you know? A wrong move or too suddenly can cause painful spasms."

She raised the syringe she was holding in her hand.

"I can not give him painkillers, but I can give him muscle relaxant."

She injected the product in the IV and let it take effect. After a few endless seconds, Matt's heart rate decreased, his eyes opened again without a frown this time. Emily smiled.

"Hello!"

He closed his eyes and moved his head toward Kelly.

"You move, you're in pain. So don't move. Alright?"

He feigned a nod, trying to make him understand that he understood.

"Good ! Are you awake enough to call the doctor?"

Matt frowned. Kelly pursed his hand so he turned his head towards him.

"You feel ready to see the doc?"

Again, Matt talked his way. He coughed along the tube stuck in his throat, which made Kelly laugh. "He is ready!"

Emily didn't fully understand how these two friends were communicating, but she knew, in her heart, that Kelly was right. He was ready.

"Just by couching, you know he's ready?"

''Let's see : he has apparently associated to the doctor to 'remove this tube to my throat'. So yes. He coughs, he wants the tube out."

The nurse smiled, finally understanding why Kelly had laughed.

"Unfortunately, we can't remove the tube right now."

She called the doctor and took the opportunity to check all the machines around him and his bandages, particularly his left side. By putting the bandages out slightly, Kelly let out a cry of horror. Part of his scar tissues had broken, probably when he had straightened while Matt still had his hand through his hair.

"That's why he was in pain.''

Matt tried to understand, but as he didn't see his left hand, he frowned again.

"Your skin is fragile here. Hence the pain. "

Seeing that Kelly was trying to communicate as simply as possible, she did the same, wishing that Matt understood what she said. The door opened and let Dr. Riley appear. Matt turned his head slightly, saw him and coughed once again, which made the doctor smile and laugh.

"I'm glad to be remembered that way!"

He approached the breathing machine and noticed that Matt was breathing almost normally, without additional help.

''Can you breathe for me?''

Matt didn't understand what was happening, at least not really.

"Trust me, just breathe."

Despite the fact that he still had this tube down his throat, Matt tried to take a deep breath.

"Hep hep! Just... Small and shallow okay? Not too deep. Your injuries don't allow it."

Matt obeyed and took some small breaths.

"I'll do some tests, okay? To see if I can remove the tube easily."

Matt blinked, allowing the doctor and the nurse working on him. Riley took his stethoscope and placed it near Matt's heart.

"Breathe as normally as possible."

Matt was very nervous. He iddn't go often to hospital, and he felt uncomfortable when he was there as a patient. But he still obeyed once again.

"Good. I think it's time. This tube can be removed."

Matt's gaze brightened aimmediately.

"I'm not agreeing doctor."

The doctor turned to the nurse with a dark look.

''Excuse me?!''

"You don't see it as he is conscious, but when he is asleep, he isn't breathing at all. There are no reflex. Extubate him now will cause much damage. Moreover, he tolerates this mode."

"This mode?"

"The smart ventilation".

"Well... Alright. We will wait a little. I'll come back later. Mister looks very tired."

The nurse and doctor Riley left the room, leaving Matt to rest a little before continuing to run tests. Kelly continued to caress Matt's hand while he drifted to sleep. He took the opportunity to call Shay who was at Lakeshore near Gabby and Antonio.

" _Kelly?_ "

"Hey Shay, you okay?"

" _Yes, a little tired. And you and Matt?_ "

"Tired too, and Matt is asleep now. Dr. Riley wanted to extubate but the nurse convinced him to not do it."

" _What do you mean?_ "

"When he's awake, he is breathing normally with the ventilator, but..."

" _But what?_ "

"I..."

He did not know how to talk about his feelings.

"I don't know, I'm worried."

Waiting for an answer from Shay, he paused. But with no answer, he continued.

"He... Matt seems to have problems to understand. I mean, as soon as there are too many words or complex words, he didn't seem to understand what we say and every time, we have to simplify the sentence so that he understands. Riley thinks it's because he's too groggy, but I don't think the same. And when he sleeps, he doesn't breathe on his own."

" _And... And you have spoken to him?_ "

"Not yet. We will see that when he'll run the rest of the tests he wanted to do."

At the other end of the phone, Shay was becoming worried too about Matt.

"And Gabby?"

" _Uh... She uh... She's still unconscious. Doctors took him to run some neurological tests to find out why she doesn't wake up._ "

Shay was really torn between anger and sadness. She didn't know whether to scream to evacuate all the fear and anger inside of her, or cry to evacuate sadness. He hung up and looked at Matt. He was awake again, but was so groggy that he didn't even make the effort to breathe.

"Matt, you need to rest. Okay? We'll talk later."

Matt shook his head from side to side. Kelly sighed. Yeah, his stubborn little brother was back.

"Do this to your big brother Kelly.''

Matt closed his eyes. That made Kelly smile.

"That's one of the first times I've seen you give up against me!"

He opened his eyes. It was hard to understand, but at least see Kelly smile made him smile. He stopped and looked serious.

"Go back to sleep. If you want this tube out, you have to sleep and regain strength."

Matt tried to nod, but too tired, he closed his eyes without any gesture.

* * *

At Lakeshore, Antonio had just arrived in the room, surprised to see no bed, and so her little sister.

"Shay, where is Gabby?"

Shay jumped, she didn't even hear Antonio enter the room.

"Uh... Doctors took her to... Run some tests."

She wiped the tears streaming down her cheeks. She cried since Kelly had called earlier. Antonio frowned and approached Shay, sat down on the chair and took her hand.

"Shay... What happened?"

She took a deep breath and prepared herself mentally.

"Kelly called. And..."

She didn't even manage to finish her sentence. But Antonio realized it was serious. He picked up his phone and called urgently Kelly because Shay couldn't speak.

"Kelly?" called Antonio after the first ring when he answered.

" _Hi Antonio_ ", Kelly greeted murmuring.

"Why are you whispering?"

" _Wait a seconds._ "

He waited a few seconds before having an answer again.

" _I'm in the hallway. Matt is asleep. Go ahead._ "

"Uh... Shay is bad. And I don't know what to do."

" _What do you mean ? I just have her on the phone._ "

"She's in tears, and she just said that you called so... So I called you. There is a problem with Matt?"

For several seconds there was no sound. You could have heard a pin drop.

" _It's just that... Something's wrong. He..._ "

Antonio heard Kelly sigh. He seemed to search for words.

" _When he is awake, he breathes on his own, but when he sleeps, he can't. And... And when we speak, if the sentence is complicated, he doesn't understand._ "

"Oh my God..."

He put one hand to his lips, shocked.

" _It's not the worst._ "

"What could be worse than that? Amnesia maybe?"He tried to joke.

But when there was no answer at the other end, just silence, he realized his mistake. He understood what was happening.

"Oh no, don't tell me that-"

" _It is_ " Kelly interrupted, almost in tears. _"His last memory was in April 2005_ ".

Antonio tried to gather all the pieces of the puzzle. And when it was done, he almost collapsed to the ground.

"Kelly, you mean that... that..."

" _Yes. For him, Gabby doesn't even exist._ "

He slid his phone out of his hand, dropping it to the ground and it shatter. The world collapsed aroung him.


	13. It's hard for everyone

Hello everyone! I didn't updated for a while, because of the same reason I didn't updated 'this thing that binds us': lots of work with university. BUT I had this chapter for a month now and I didn't translated it (I write in french and then I translate in english). But now, I had a short time to do it so I wanted to shape this chapter with you.

I'm glad about all the reviews you let me, and when I can, I PM you, so you can have some spoilers or some explanations etc...

I know I'm still making too much mistakes, but I'm still learning and I hope you'll pass over it.

I hope you will like this chapter though!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 12: It's hard for everyone**

The world was collapsing around them, around Antonio, Shay and kelly: Gabby didn't wake up, Matt had a partial amnesia, and had lost a lot of precious memories. The only one to have understood nothing because she had heard nothing, it was Shay. She retrieved the phone to Antonio who was on the ground, this phone which had now a broken screen and put it to her ear.

"Kelly, what's going on, dammit!"

What she heard broke her heart. She heard Kelly crying, and it was rare enough to know that if that was the case, it was really serious.

"How bad is it?"

But he couldn't even talk. She turned to Antonio, who had not moved an inch, staring into space, shocked and lost.

"Antonio? How bad?"

He opened his mouth, but too shocked to speak, he closed it, and his eyes too. Seeing the distress of two of her friends, she spent her free hand over her mouth.

"He... He... His last memory was in April 2005".

The time Shay took to understand, thirty seconds passed. And she also began realize everything.

"No... No", she said, shaking her head and closing her eyes.

The doctor arrived at the same time with Gabby, still in that hospital bed, inert. And they came at the wrong time: Shay and Antonio was on the ground, almost hung on the phone in shock.

"Oh my God, what happened?"

The doctor and some nurses who accompanied him rushed at them to make them sit in a chair the time to rehook Gabby at all the machines. Then he turned back to the two friends to have some explanation.

"This is the boyfriend? Matt, right?"

Having neither the strength nor the courage to talk, they nodded.

"A bad new?''

Again, they nodded while looking down. And they began to cry. The doctor approached them to comfort them.

"I'm really sorry... sincerely''.

"He is not dead", Antonio managed to say. "He... Part of his memory is missing. The past nine years... He... He has no memories of them".

As a neurologist, he wanted to reassure them.

"After the trauma he suffered, it's quite logical to have partial amnesia, although it's large this time. When the swelling will go down, his memory will return gradually".

"This is where the problem is: there... There is no swelling in the memory area".

The doctor said nothing for a moment, and then remembered a little discussion he had with colleagues from Chicago Med.

"He... He was brain dead right? And his doctor tried the cerebral 'defibrillator' on him?"

Shay looked up and nodded. She was not really sure how he knew that.

"It's a very risky technology, still in trial. Certainly the last tries are successful, but the patient suffers a lot".

Shay still didn't speak, but the expressions on her face said everything: she wanted to know more.

"This process involves implanting electrodes on the space that emits a specific wavelength that is observed in patients with brain dead or in a deep coma. These electrodes pick up this signal, amplify it and spread it in the brain. This seems safe, but if this wave is at a very low frequency, it's for good reason: it is harmful to the brain. It turns down other parts of the brain, which sometimes suffered any trauma. And if he already has a serious brain injury before, it only increases the risk of permanent damage".

"As?"

"It depends on the patient. But I think the test has never been driving on a polytrauma as Matt. In any case, not on a patient with damage in the occipital lobe".

"Why no one has ever done tests on these patients...?"

"Because this is the part of the brain that controls vision. And lesions on this lobe can have great consequences: blindness, visual agnosia, cerebral achromatopsia, difficulty of moving in space or recognize places even familiar..."

"How do you know all this? On this trial I mean".

"Because I am a strong opponent. The idea is great, but the consequences are currently far too heavy to be used on patients".

Leslie nodded, concerned about the future of his friend. She pulled herself together briefly and lit her voice.

"And uh... And Gabby?"

"Oh yes, sorry. Uh... There is still a significant swelling in her inner ear, but the rest of the brain is intact. We don't know why she isn't waking up. She is in a semi-coma, and she doesn't seem to hear us. That's all I can tell you for now. We'll run the tests again in a few days if nothing changes. Until then, keep hoping, she will wake up".

He addressed them a smile before going out. Antonio turned to Shay.

"Go to Kelly. He is alone and... And he needs you".

"But in this case, you're also going to be alone. I can't leave you".

"My parents will be here in no time. I won'tt be alone for long. But Kelly, he is since a while. So go ahead, go to Chicago Med".

Shay smiled slightly, kissed Antonio on his right cheek.

"Stay strong. For Gabby".

He shook his head up and down, leaving Shay spinning out of the room. He gently took the hand of his little sister, stroking it gently.

"Please sis' wake up fast. Matt needs you..."

* * *

"Kelly".

Kelly jumped, looking towards the door. For nearly half an hour, he only looked at his sleeping friend, harmonizing his breathing with the sound of the ventilator. He had red eyes, as he hadn't stopped crying the whole time.

"Shay?"

He was surprised to see her here because he thought she was at Lakeshore.

"You're not with Antonio?"

"His parents were coming. So I came here immediately".

"Christie is expected soon either. She just finished her courses, she comes immediately".

"And Violet in all this?"

"Apparently she'll sleep tonight with a friend. So this is good".

A minute passed in silence, lulled by the sounds of the monitor and the breathing machine.

"So it's true? He has... Amnesia?"

Kelly sighed, closing his eyes and difficulty nodding up and down.

"You realize everything he has... Forgot?"

"Yes..."

The two friends knew everything: he had forgotten his mother's release from prison after fifteen years in jail, his reconciliation with his sister, the death of Andy, the death of Hallie he had met shortly before his last memory, meeting Gabby and his relationship with her, his head injury, part of his team and firefighters from firehouse 51, his promotion for lieutenant and therefore his position from a simple fireman to the leader of truck 81, Kelly's promotion at the same rank and to the leader of squad 3 and all those events since his last memory on 16th April 2005.

"My God, how we will manage to live with that?"

"I don't know".

Soon, Kelly's attention turned to Matt. He had felt a slight tip on his hand. Recently, it was their way to say hello, but also the best way for Matt to say that he was awake.

"Matt is waking up".

Shay moved closer, sitting on a chair next to Kelly. They watched Matt trying to open his eyes. But he immediately closed them, blinded by the light.

"I'll close the light".

Shay stood up and pressed the button to filter the light and Matt opened his eyes, locking them to Shay who sat down again. He signed something with his left arm, something that Kelly and Leslie didn't understand.

"Uh, Matt? We don't speak sign language".

Really wanting to be understood, he pointed weakly Shay, then put his finger to his temple, then waved his denial.

"You... You mean that... In your head, she doesn't exist, right?" Kelly asked, pointing Shay.

In his own way, Matt was understood and nodded.

"Then I introduce myself, my name is Leslie Shay, Shay for everyone".

She smiled while Matt said hello in his own way.

"We know each other for a long time. Well... When I said we..."

She didn't have time to finish, Christie had knocked on the door and had just entered.

"Oh my God Christie, you saved our lives!"

She stopped her advancement in the room, astonished.

"What?"

"We need a translator".

She opened her mouth and lowered her head, then smiled. She was the only one who can really communicate with Matt.

 _ **Hi little brother!**_

 _ **Hi sis'!**_

 _ **They don't bother you too much?**_

 _ **No... I'm just trying to get to know... I don't remember her name.**_

 _ **Shay?**_

 _ **Yes that's it! She says we knows each other for a long time I would like to know more.**_

"Christie..."

Startled, she turned her head to Kelly, who was giving her a weird look.

"Oh sorry ! He wants more details on you Shay. The fact that you know him for a long time".

"I was trying to explain when you came. Well... I know you for about five years. We work in the same firehouse. I'm a paramedic".

 _ **McArthur's gone?**_

"He asked if... McArthur? Is gone".

"He's gone after an injury un the line of duty. He couldn't stay".

 _ **I liked him. What I missed other than that? I mean important.**_

"He wants to know what he missed important".

Shay and Kelly looked each other into the eyes. They were not ready to tell him everything. They turned to Christie.

"You can't say I?"

"We don't have the strength to do it".

"I'll tell him then".

Shay rose so Christie could sit beside her brother while she stood behind Kelly and put her hands on his shoulders. Matt squinted and began to sign.

 _ **They are together?**_

 _ **Not really. Well, I don't think so. They are roommates, and very close.**_

 _ **I see. Well, what I missed, apart the 'mom out of jail' part.**_

 _ **I don't know where to start.**_

 _ **From the beginning.**_

Christie smiled. He wasn't wrong. But the hardest part was just the beginning of what he'd missed in nine years. She took a deep breath and began, careful to simplify at its maximum her sentences so her borther could understand.

 _ **In September 2005 you were promoted to lieutenant. And you took the leadership of truck 81.**_

 _ **I passed the test? How much?**_

She turned to Kelly.

"He passed the lieutenant test with how much?"

"Uh... I think it was a 97".

She turned to her brother again.

 _ **This is a good score?**_ Asked Christie.

 _ **This is a note to 100. So yes.**_

 _ **Okay, okay. Then Kelly passed it too not so long time after you I think. He is in charge of squad 3.**_

He turned his head slightly toward Kelly and gave him his congratulations.

"He gives you his congratulations".

"Thanks bro. But you trained me well. When you passed the test, I didn't even know. So when I knew, I also applied for the session after yours".

 _ **So who I have under my command? Hermann, Mouch, Cruz, Andy and Vargas?**_

She opened her mouth, unable to speak. She turned to Kelly again.

"Who is under his command?"

"Oh, well... Hermann, Mouch, Otis, Cruz and Mills".

 _ **And Vargas? And Andy?**_

"He asks for Vargas and Andy".

Kelly closed his eyes and lowered his head.

 _ **They are both dead?**_

"Vargas had an accident in the line of duty. He can't be a firefighter anymore. And... Andy... Andy died in a fire in September 2012".

 _ **Heather? And Griffin?**_

 _ **They are in Florida. And besides, there is another boy in the family. I think his name is Ben and was born in 2009.**_

 _ **They are okay?**_

 _ **They often call you. At least once a month. Andy had you placed as legal guardian of the children if something happened to him and Heather.**_

 _ **Yeah?**_

 _ **Yes! Besides, you kept them for two months this year, before they all leave for Florida.**_

 _ **Okay. And what else?**_

"Matt..."

He watched his sister, who seemed shocked.

 _ **What did I say?**_

 _ **We just announced that your brother is dead, and you don't react?**_

 _ **You want me to do what? Cry? Apparently I have cried.**_

 _ **Matt, this is not you!**_

 _ **I AM NOT ME ANYMORE! Look at me ! Do you think I'm me?!**_

She let out a cry of horror, collapsed into tears and ran out of the room.

"I'll go get her''.

Shay also left the room to go get Christie and talk to her. Kelly didn't know what Matt had told his sister, but she seemed shocked by something. Something wrong.

"I... I thought that... That the death of Andy would make you... Not you", Kelly announced.

Matt watched his older brother in amazement, but also with sadness. He turned his head to the right, closing his eyes. Then he raised his hand, made a fist, let his thumb up and then returned his fist. As to say he had done something wrong.

"Matt, I don't blame you. Wait, maybe the doctor could enlighten us".

He pressed the nurses buton so Emily could call Dr. Riley.

"Hello! Slept well?"

Matt had still his head to the right, not moving at all.

"There is a problem?"

"You can call Dr. Riley for me? Please? It's important".

She paged the doctor and waited a few minutes. She checked his vitals, noting everything on the chart in the end of his bed before the doctor appeared at the door.

"Hello again everyone, siesta was good?"

But no one answered, and they looked away.

"I see... What happened?"

"I wanted to ask if... If it was normal to not feel sadness when we learn that his brother is dead".

The doctor raised his eyebrows, took by surprise.

"Well, this is not usual. It happened when?"

"September 2012".

"Mh..."

Matt had not moved, staring at the blank wall in front of him.

"If he has already mourning his brother, that's possible, yes. In fact, even if the brain doesn't remember, the body can remember. And so, if the mourning is done, he can feel sadness but not the emotions we feel when we lose a friend or love and we just said it to you".

"So it's... Normal?"

''If his body remembers, then yes. We can say it like that".


	14. Black and white

Hello everyone and have a great ChicagoFire day!

I want to update this story before going to bed (11:30pm here) because I didn't update for awhile. I hope you will enjoy it and let me some reviews so I can write the next chapters in a good way (hopefully). I have ideas in mind but if you want something else, just tell me ;)

Enjoy and again, have a good ChicagoFire day (Mouch's bachelor party will kill you, I promise!)

* * *

 **CHAPTER 13 : Black and white**

Kelly was worry, it was stronger than him. He knew Matt, even better than Matt hilmself now and this scarred him. He wondered if he would recover his memory one day, these nine years he has forgotten. And if not, what would happen for Matt? And Gabby? Dr. Rilet had said that his feelings were out of whack, and that if he had mourned somone, he could feel anything. But Kelly's heart was hurt right now. Because his brother wasn't his brother. After two hours of rest, Emily lowered his dose of morphine to see if the pain was managable for Matt. So he would wake up soon. And Shay was still there, comforting his roommate while he was looking at his brother, for the umpteenth time.

"Christie was really shocked by Matt's behavior", Shay finally said because she couldn't bear the tension anymore.

"We have to understand Matt too. He lost nine years of his life and we throw everything on his face, just in a few minutes".

Kelly sighed deeply.

"And the doctor said it was expected after the trauma he'd suffered".

Shay thought about something, about what the doctor of Gabby had said to her.

"I spoke with Dr. Sevenson. She knows this... 'Brain defibrilator' technology. She's totally opposed to it. She... She says it's a great idea but finds that the danger for the patient is still too high to be used".

"What did she say exactly?"

"She said that... When a patient is in a deep coma or brain dead, a part of the brain still continues to emit a very low frequency wave. The aim of this... This trial is to capture this wave, amplify it and spread it throughout the brain to restart it. Same aim as the cardiac defibrilator but for the brain".

"Yeah, Dr. Riley explained it to us".

"But he didn't explain everything", Shay confirmed.

He turned his head toward Shay for the first time with a puzzled look.

"According to her, if this wave is at a very low frequency, it's because this wave if very harmful. And if this wave is amplified and spread, it can short-circuit some parts of the brain which have not suffered any trauma. And still according to her, the experience had never been tested on a polytrauma with a bleeding in the occipital lobe".

"Why?"

"Because this part of the brain is controlling the vision and direction in space. If this part is damaged, it can have big consequences".

"If you're thinking about blindness, he's not".

"There may be other visual problems you know. I would like to know what damage the trial has left, and the sooner the better".

Kelly was thinking, assimilating what Shay had told him. A part of these informations, he had never hear of them. He wanted to see his neurologist, immediately. He pushed the nurse button so Emily would come and call Dr. Riley. Almost immediately, she entered, panicked.

"Is there a problem?"

"No, not at all. I would like to speak to Dr. Riley. Immediately".

"Ah..."

She paged him and smiled while approaching the bed to take Matt's vitals.

"Everything is looking good. His heart rate is stable at 80 despite some periods of arrhythmia, his blood pressure is coming up slowly. He's urinating correctly and his injuries are healing good".

She took the file at the edge of the bed and noted his vitals when the door opened.

"Someone paged me here?"

"Yes doctor", Emily answered.

He entered the room, closed the door and approached the group.

"I want to talk to you", Kelly anounced.

Dr. Riley turned his head toward Emily, who raised her hands. She didn't know anything.

"Alright".

"Is that true?"

The doctor frowned and placed his hands on his hips.

"Sorry?"

"Is that ture? The experience is highly dangerous?"

"Who said this to you?"

He was wondering if it was one of his colleagues or someone outside the hospital.

"Nevermind, I'm asking you the truth: is this technology highy dangerous?"

The neurologist swallowed hard and nervously. Nobody until today arose so many questions.

"F-for now... Yes".

Kelly's and Shay's eyes widened. And Kelly passed his hand over his mouth.

"I can't believe it".

"But as I told you, and I told you the truth, with each patient, this technology improves. And the fact that this was the first time we used it on a case like Matt, it can help us to better understand the brain and improve this technology".

"So for you, Matt is just an experience?! A guinea pig?!"

The doctor opened his mouth, but he couldn't talk anymore.

"I just wanted to help. And no offense you, you accepted the risks".

"You didn't give me all the settings!"

"And if I would have given them to you, would you have accepted?"

"Probably not! Not if it's to see my best friend and brother be turned into vegetable!"

Emily stepped between Kelly and Dr. Riley.

"You didn't noticed it because you were fighting, but someone is listening".

She turned toward the bed, then eveyone did. Matt was fully awake, and he was sobbing. Kelly understood immediately that Matt had heard and understood everything.

"Matt..."

Kelly approched him, but Matt signed to him to not to.

"Matt, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it..."

He realized his mistakes: Matt had perfectly understood.

"I'm sorry..."

Dr. Riley stepped forward and stopped near Kelly, looking at Matt.

"I presume you understood everything, at least a part".

Matt took some minutes to answer, because he was angry but also to assimilate what he had heard. He shook his head up to down, then turned his head away from the door, looking at the white wall and crying.

"I... I w-would like to test your brain, fully. To know where are the damage and what they are".

Matt didn"t move, but all could hear thatMatt did not move, but everyone could hear that according his breathing, he was angry and he was crying.

"We need to know this soon. To treat you correctly. The more we wait, the more severe it will be".

Once again, Matt took his time to answer, trying desperately to sort through his emotions. A minute later, he nodded.

"Alright. First, we'll test everything we can here. Mobility, vision, hearing etc. Matt? Can you turn your head to us? It's important".

Gently, to not hurt himself, he turned his head to Kelly, but not the doctor. He didn't want to. In a way, he felt betryed by his doctor, he felt that Kelly felt betrayed too, and this made him hurt. Dr. Riley knew it, but as a doctor, he needed to access the injuries.

"The sister is not here?"

"Christie. Her name's Christe. And yes, she's here", a female voice said behind them.

Surprised, they turned toward this voice. It was indeed Christie. She had red eyes: she'd cried for a long time. She was looking at her brother, who was also looking at her back. Then he closed his eyes and let escape some tears. He made a fist with his left hand, placed it on his chest and made some circles with it, clockwise.

"What he's saying?" Kelly asked.

Christie opened her mouth and breathed.

"He... H-he said he's sorry. Matt, you don't have to. I... I had no idea that..."

She took a deep breath.

"Nevermind. I'm here, and I won't let you. Not like fifteen years ago", she assured, shaking her head from side to side.

Matt nodded slightly after several seconds, then stroke her hand. She raised her head and locked her gaze on Matt's.

 _ **Can you... Tell me the rest of my life? Please?**_

 _ **I will after your exams, I promise.**_

 _ **I don't want tests.**_

 _ **Matt, they're important. They'll tell us where are the damage caused by... By your accident.**_

Matt raised an eyebrow slughtly, but this lasted only a microsecond. He closed his eyes, not wanting to look her sister anymore.

 _ **You're hiding me something.**_

"Matt, I will tell you your life after exams, but now, you have to trust us... No: you have to trust ME. Exams, then we talk. I promise".

Matt didn't move for a few seconds, before answering.

 _ **Do your damn exams.**_

 _ **Matt, I think you have to cooperate on this one.**_

 _ **What do you mean?**_

 _ **I don't know. But I think that... He wants to test all the parts of your brain, including your senses.**_

 _ **Okay, so tell my fucking doctor that I would like to have my vision back, like old time. He can do that?**_

 _ **What? What do you mean?**_

Even if he was still hooked to the ventilator, all could see and hear that Matt was sighing.

 _ **I just want my vision back okay? And not watching a part of the scene like in the movies of the 30s.**_

 _The movies of the 30s?!_ Christie thought. _But they were in... Oh God!_

Kelly could see that Chistie was holding her tears. She took a deep breath.

 _ **Your... Your vision is... In black and white?**_


	15. The right diagnosis

Hello there! I didn't updated as soon as I wanted because I wanted to finish the 'Buried alive' story before anything else. So right now, here is a new chapter. The final diagnosis will be made (for Matt). I hope you still enjoy it :)

Have a good sunday everyone!

* * *

 **Chapter 14 : the right diagnosis**

Christie couldn't believe what her brother had said. See in black and white?!

"So? We can begin the tests?" Dr. Riley asked, impatient to begin.

"He wants his vision back".

The doctor seemed a little puzzled, not understanding.

"He... He says that he sees partially in black and white".

"W-what? Partially in black and white?"

Matt didn't face the doctor, but tried to explain to his sister.

 _ **My right eye. I can't see colors, it's... Grey. And I think I have a worse vision than before.**_

"He says that his vision is worse than before and it's grey with his right eye".

"Okay, each thing at the time alright? We'll check your vision and act accordingly".

Dr. Riley showed him several boards with many colors on them.

"We'll cover your left eye".

Emily placed a gauze on his left eye and added some tape to keep it in place.

"What number do you see on the first board?"

Matt looked the first board.

 _ **I'm not sure, but it's a 12.**_

He's not sure, but he sees a 12 on it", Christie confirmed, not looking the boards but focussing her gaze on Matt.

"And this board?"

It was the number 29 in light red-orange in a dark green background.

 _ **29.**_

"Number 29".

Dr. Riley took another board. This time, the number 3 was in a light green and the background was orange but in the same tone.

"And now?"

Matt narrowed his eyes, staring the board closer before answering.

 _ **I don't see anything.**_

"He sees nothing".

Kelly could now see that there was really a problem but said nothing. This situation made Dr. Riley and Emily smile. Kelly didn't know what was so funny but he still said nothing. The doctor took a new board, using the same principle as the second board, but this time, the number 15 was in a light green and the background was in a dark red.

 _ **15.**_

"15".

He repeated the same process, sometimes with a borad with numbers, couples times it was a board with a colored line. And he did the same test, with the same board, but with with his left eye.

"So, we need to run one more test to hold the diagnosis but he seems that Matt has achromatia at the level in his right eye".

"Achromatia?"

"It means he sees in shades of grey. It's not genetic color blindness, it's his brain injury, or the trial".

"And how can you say it's not genetic?"

"If it was, he wouldn't have said he was seeing in shades of grey. He couldn't have said he was seeing in shades of grey to be exact. If it was genetic, he couldn't have named the colors. Et he sees perfectly with his left eye".

"Okay so he became color blind because of his injury".

"Okay, I explain. We see colors because of three prisms in our eyes: one is green, one is blue and the lest one is red. They are the three primary colors", Dr. Riley began to explain.

"I... I thought it was yellow, magenta and cyan?" Kelly asked a little puzzled.

"It's only in arts Kelly. The real three primary colors are green, blue and red".

Kelly was confused but let the doctor continue.

"When someone has color blindness, it means that one of the prisms doesn't work. When the red prism doesn't work, it's protanopia, when the green prism doesn't work it's deuteranopia, and finally when the blue prism is down, it's tritanopia".

"And when it's achromatia?"

"Then no prism works. That's why the patients with achromatia see in shades of grey and in black and white".

"So... So he can't be a firefighter anymore?"

"If we just talk about the color blindness, then I don't know yet. Even if these visual disabilities are seen as the weakness, it can be an advantage. Mainly, when we can't see in colors, we can see the tones of colors. The Ishihara test, the one I did with the boards, can tell us this. Matt is perceiving really well in shades".

"I can't see how we can turn this color blindness into an advantage".

"Okay".

The doctor took a deep breath and continued.

"People with achromatia can't see in colors, a low vicual acuity, high photosensibility, sometimes a nystagmus but Matt doesn't have one. Otherwise, they can make the difference between tones of colors. People with achromatia are very usefull for the militaries because they can see the ennemy camouflage, for example".

"But he can't be a firefighter anymore".

"The intensity of light emitted by flames will blind him. It's the same problem with sun. even if he wears special contact lenses, he will be blind in such cases. It's called hemeralopia. Some example: if I open the curtains and turn the light on, Matt will close his eyes because of the high luminosity".

Kelly and Christie nodded. And finally, Matt pinched his sister's hand.

 _ **I don't understand.**_

 _ **Your left eye is normal and you sees in color, but with your right eye you can't. You sees in shades. You understand?**_

 _ **No!**_

Christie turned again to the doctor.

"He doesn't understand".

"Matt, do you remember the test earlier? On your eyes?"

He nodded, then frowned.

"I showed you the same boards for both of your eyes, in the same order".

 _ **Impossible.**_

 _ **But it's true Matt. He showed you the same boards.**_

"Look", the doctor insisted, taking a board. "with your left eye, which number do you see?"

He closed his right eye and looked at the board. It was the second board the doctor had shown him. The one with the number 29 in light orange and the backboard in dark green.

 _ **29.**_

"29".

"And with your right eye?"

Matt opened his eye and closed the other.

 _ **The same number. But without colors, just... Oh...**_

 _ **What? What is it? There is a problem? Talk to me!**_

 _ **I think I understand. I saw the number 29 because the number was lighter than the background.**_

"He sees the same number. He thinks he understands. Can you show him a board with different colors but the same tone?"

The doctor nodded and took anither board. It was the third board, the one with the number 3 in green and the background in red, but the same light tone. Matt closed his right eye.

 _ **I see the number 3.**_

Then he reopened it and closed the other.

 _ **But now, I can't see any number. When the colors are the same tone, I don't see anything. But when the tones are different, I can see it.**_

"He understands".

"Alright! Now we can continue?"

Matt nodded again.

"Okay, I will ask you to let me do my job, and if something is wrong, if you're hurt or if you have some weird sensations, squeeze you sister's hand okay?"

He nodded again. The doctor began to palpate his body, beginning with his arms, being careful with his broken right arm. Then he lowered on his chest. This time, he pinched his sister's hand.

"Stop!"

The doctor stopped, turning his head to Christie, and she turned her head to her brother.

 _ **It really hurts. When he passed his hend on my left.**_

"It hurt him when you passed your hand on his left side".

"Here?"

The doctor pressed again on the sensible area, making Matt wince, and he nodded.

"It's pretty normal, you have a scar incision here. It's still sensible, it's normal. And you hace some broken ribs it's also a pain factor".

He continued to palpate, passing his hand on his stomach. He saw that Matt tensed a little when he passed it, and he looked at Christie.

"He didn't pinch".

"Matt, it hurts when I press it?"

Riley pressed on his stomach.

 _ **A little but not... Not it really hurts.**_

"Just a little".

Riley shook his head and continued. He came then on his basin. This time, he shook her sister's hand so hard, she cried of pain. Matt closed his eyes, began to cry while making a fist with his left hand and punching the bed.

"I'm sorry Matt, but I had to do it. I will rise from your toes to your pelvis okay?"

Slowly and slightly, he passed his hands over his feet, over his legs while Matt was holding his urge to crush his sister's hand, biting his lower lip until blood and closing his eyes.

"Stop it, you really hurt him doctor...", Christie finally said, crying because of the pain that Matt was feeling.

"It's done. It's done...", the doctor assured. "I just checked if he was feeling every part of his body".

"And there weren't any other painless ways?!" Kelly cried before Christie could talk.

"It was the best way to have the right diagnosis. It's painful I know, but I had no choice".

They could hear Matt sigh despite the ventilator. He had his eyes closed, tears streaming down his cheeks.

 _ **I'm really tired. And in pain.**_

 _ **Try to get some sleep. The other tests don't require you to be awake. I think.**_

Christie turned her head.

"It's necessary for the other tests to be awake?" she asked the doctor.

"No. Why?"

"He's really tired. And knowing my brother, he's also in pain".

 _ **Really, really hurt?**_ She asked her brother.

 _ **I... I never felt this so much pain.**_

 _ **Then rest. The pain should will give you something.**_

"Matt? Emily will give you something for the pain. You will sleep a few hours okay?"

Matt nodded with his eyes closed.

 _ **If I didn't have this ventilator...**_

 _ **What? What is it Matt?**_

 _ **I think I will puke of pain...**_

 _ **You're nauseous? Because of the pain? Tell me the truth.**_

 _ **Nauseous... And I think I will be sick if the pain is still high like this.**_

"Doctor? There's nothing you can do against nausea? The pain makes him nauseous and he wants to vomit now".

"We can do something", Dr. Riley said with a slight smile on his lips.

Emily shook her head and injected a extra dose of morphine and an anti-emetic to calm his nausea. Slowly, Matt's eyes closed and he plunged into a deep sleep soon after. The ventilator made a huge noise and passed into a controled breathing. It was the first time for Dr. Riley. He could see now with his eyes this phenomenon, but he didn't really know what was happening.

"As I told you, when he's unconscious, he's not breathing on his own. The breathing machine breathes for him until his awakening".

"I see. If we stop the diagnosis right now, Matt has four big damage: he lost his last nine years of memory, he has achromatia, he has difficulties to understand long and/or complex sentences and his breathing is not spontaneous when he's sleeping".

Kelly sat next to Christie, completely despondent. Matt wasn't the little brother he had known anymore.


	16. I promised

Hello everyone! I am between two mass starts (BIATHLON, for those who follow this sport) so I translated a new chapter of 'getting through this'. BTH: congratulations for the Canadians to have win the first historic medal for a non-european country in a relay of a world championship (bronze medal for the men relay!). Nobody had excepted it, and it was a great surprise!

Anyway, I know I let Gabby a little out of it, but it was 'wanted'.You will find out why in this chapter. I hope you will like it :)

And again and again, I'm sorry for any mistakes I made. I know it's a bit frustrating and annoying for you, but it's been less than a year that I'm learning english, so...

* * *

 **CHAPTER 15 : I promised**

See her like this was becoming so unfair for Antonio. See his little sister in this bed, completely still, unable to breathe on her own, in a coma while Matt was healing... He was angry about this situation. There was so much hatred right now that he didn't know if he had to confront his brother-in-law who wouldn't recognize him, or if he had to stay near his sister and look at her. Why he'd pushed her? If he hadn't, she would be at the shape of Matt, but she would be lucid, awake and healing. But now... She stayed there motionless, like... Lifeless. And this, Antonio couldn't support it anymore. And it wasn't his broken hand that was going to stop him, far from it. He decided then, for the first time, to see Matt at Chicago Med. Kelly and Shay were on shift and only Christie, Matt's sister would be at his side. He wanted to see with his own eyes how he was healing. But Kelly, Shay and Christie had said nothing to him about the damage that his injuries had left, except for his memory problems. And Shay didn't see the tests because she left to go to the cafeteria, to eat something for the first time in two days. Only one person managed to get him out of his thoughts: the nurse, when she came to cure Gabby and take her vitals.

"Hello mister Dawson! How are you today?"

As usual, Irina the nurse smiled, and he didn't answer, cold and distant. She approached the bed, looking at the screens of the machines, replacing the bags from her Ivs, curing her injuries, changing her bandages.

"Your sister is going better every day mister Dawson. Her vitals returned to normal now".

She continued to reassure him, but there was no need to. Her sister would probably never wake up, and this made him rage. Why Matt was going to pull through when his sister would remain here, motionless? Why she was in a lot worse shape than him while physically, she suffured the least damage?

"But she isn't waking up", he finally said to the nurse's surprise.

"Her body is healing. I'm sure she'll wake up soon".

"HOW DARE YOU?!

Antonio stood up suddenly, passing and hustling the nurse and left the room, slamming the door. He was tired of being told that his sister would wake up soon. He wanted her to be awake. He wanted his sister. And Matt get paid for what he did despite his promise to protect her. When he arrived to Chicago Med, he asked the receptionist where was his room. But he was in ICU and visits were limited. Fortunaltely, he was family, so he could see him. But once in front of the door, he was seized by doubt: he knew that Matt wouldn't recognize him, so how he should proceed? How he should present himself? After some numerous minutes thinking, he couldn't decide. A hand on his shoulder brought him back to reason.

"May I help you?"

He turned his head, and saw a nurse with a slight smile.

"Uh... I... I'm Matt's brother-in-law. His girlfriend's brother".

"Gabby, right?"

He nodded. How she could know her name?

"Kelly told me about her. I often ask some news when we are outside the room or when Matt is resting".

"Why not when he's awake?"

"Because he doesn't know yet this part of his memory. His sister Christie didn't have time to explain this part of his life he forgot".

Antonio was lost. Why not have mentionned this part of his life?

"Christie wanted to tell him when he will be awake. But he's still weak and heavily medicated, so he closes his eyes very quickly. He should be awake by now. I was going to cure him. Why not enter with me?"

He didn't have time to answer. She opened the door and entered. So Antonio had no choice but follox her.

"Hello Christie! How are you today?"

"Oh, hello Emily! I'm good and you?"

"Good! And Matt?"

Antonio saw Matt making some gestures with his left arms, slowly but at least, he was moving. Not his sister.

"He's saying that he will be better without this... Damn breathing machine".

"Ah... Don't worry, Dr. Riley is thinking about a solution. I have one, but he won't listen to me, so I'm waiting a step from him".

Antonio hadn't noticed at first because he was focussed on him, but Matt seemed to be badly injured because of the accident. His head was still wrapped in a sterile bandage, his right arm was casted as well as his pelvis and his legs, a part of his left side was covered of gauzes and onguent. And the most significant was this hiss that never left him now. The ventilator. Matt was also hooked to one? He looked straight inti his eyes for the first time, and saw that he was the same problem than his sister: he couldn't breathe on his own, and he couldn't move as he wanted. He was just the shadow of the Matt he'd knew. Matt was also looking at him for these past few minutes, then he turned his head to his sister and made again some gestures with his left arm while the nurse was curing him.

"Don't worry Matt. He appeared in your life during these nine last years. That's why you don't recognize him".

Antonio stepped forward, but seemed paralyzed by the situation. What should he do? Christie got up and made sure that Matt couldn't hear.

"I suppose you're Gabby's brother?"

How she knew it? She never saw him before. He was sure.

"You have this hatred look when you look at my brother. If the roles were reversed, I think I would have this same look".

Antonio was ashamed now. This lood that didn't leave him when he thought of Matt. He lowered his head and looked away.

"Matt isn't the responsible of all this. By doing this, he saved her life. Nothing could prevent that a secodn car would come at full speed after the accident and hit her. He thought of being the only one injured. I know my brother: if he had seen this car, he would have attracted Gabby to him and pushed her to the other side".

Christie was right. The only thing that Matt had always wanted, it was to protect Gabby. He didn't want to see her as a firefighter because he knew the risks of the job. Under the rubble of the hospital after the collapse of the ER, he came down to find her alive, risking his own life. He did everything to save her and protect her. He did everything. But now, he couldn't do it, and he couldn't support it.

"You're right. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come".

"On the contrary".

Antonio raised his head suddenly. He didn't understand.

"I was going to tell him his story. You don't know it either right? Then stay. Please".

Without wanting it or knowing why, Antonio nodded and sat next to Christie, in face of Matt.

"I warn you, Matt speaks in ASL. So you won't understand him. I will translate what he'll say and answer verbally. You okay with this Matt?"

He nodded but frowned. For him, this man next to his sister was a perfect stranger.

 _ **It's your husband? I thought you were with a... A Jim?**_

 _ **It's not my husband, it's... You will find out later.**_

Both heard someone clear his throat and they startled.

"Oh sorry! Matt was asking if you were my husband. I said no and he will find out who you are later. It's okay for you?"

Antonio nodded and Chirstie turned to Matt again.

"Matt, I will talk verbally okay? You stop me if something is wrong".

He shook his head up to down and Christie took a deep breath.

"I told you that in september 2005, you became lieutenant. You remember?"

He shook his head again. Matt seemed to be understood by the man he didn't know.

"You know that Shay took McArthur's place five years ago. You know who are your men, but nothing else".

Matt looked stright into her eyes.

 _ **And mom got out of jail a year ago and we reconciled.**_

"And... Mom got out of jail a year ago and we reconciled. Indeed!"

This made Christie laugh, but not Antonio. Not at all.

"You were already with Hallie? Nine years ago?"

 _ **Hallie? The... Girl I met in a bar?**_

"The girl you met in a bar yes".

Matt nodded.

"You stayed with her for about eight years. She was an intern in the ER at Lakeshore. But she didn't want kids so you broke up".

Matt seemed confused.

"You came back together, but... But she got killed in a fire in which you'd been called".

Matt's eyes widened, and he did some new gestures with his arms. Probably asking what happened.

"She... You tried to save her. Resuscitate her. With the hel of Gabby but you couldn't save her".

Antonio raised his head, seeing Matt making some gestures again.

 _ **Gabby? Who is Gabby?**_

 _ **Just... Wait a little more.**_

Antonio couldn't understand ASL, but some gestures were used by everyone without noticing it was ASL. He understood that Christie had said to Matt to wait, or at least to stop talking for a moment.

"Gabby is the PIC with Shay on the ambulance 61. She arrived at 51 soon after your promotion. And before Shay".

She stopped a moment to look Antonio and smile.

"When Hallie died, Gabby helped you to get through this. With the help of Kelly. She was there at your side from day one. She's been there for you".

Antonio was amazed to see that Christie knew so much about his life while she had come to terms with his brother not long time ago.

"And one day, you

confessed your feelings to each other. Finally".

Matt didn't seem to understand. Or at least was troubled.

 _ **This... Gabby and I... Are together?**_

Antonio recognized this sign: the one who meant together. And with his expression on his face, he was asking something.

"Yes Matt. Gabby and you are together for about seven months. The man next to me is her brother. Antonio. He wanted to come and see you before but he couldn't".

Matt nodded, and began to panic.

 _ **Why she didn't come to see me? If she's really my girlfriend?**_

Christie was about to anwser, but her throat knotted. She coulodn't talk, she couldn't anymore. And Antonio didn't understand what Matt had said. She turned to him shivering.

"He... He's asking why Gabby isn't here and... And why she never came to see him".

Antonio swallowed nervously and sadly. He had to explain.

"Does he know why he is in this bed?" he whispered into her left ear.

"He knows that he had a car accident and..."

She wanted to continue but Matt oinched her hand, meaning that something was wrong. She turned to her brother before finishing her sentence while Matt was panicking and was signing.

 _ **Yesterday, you and Kelly told me that I had a car accident because I wanted to save my girlfriend.**_

"Yes Matt. You had a car accident because you wanted to save your girlfriend. And this girlfriend is Gabby".

 _ **She's okay? If I've been hit, then she's okay?**_

But no one answered. Neither Antonio nor Christie didn't have the courage. But there was a way to make him understand what had happened with this accident: the video. Antonio kept it with him on his phone but he didn't know why. He grabbedh is phone, found the video and showed it to Matt. He saw then this girlfriend he didn't know in front of this car at full speed. He saw then his own body run to her to push her on the ground before being hit by the car. He saw then this girlfriend he didn't know get up to come to him, and being hit by a second car. He saw everything, he understood everything. Gabby had aslo been hurt. And in this moment, Christie, Antonio and Emily who was still cruing him, saw all the strength he could have despite his shape.

 _ **I need to see her.**_

"Matt, you can't see her. Not now".

But he was determined. With one arm, he pushed Emily who was still curing him, he tore his Ivs and his central line before her sister, Emily or Antonio could act, he removed the scratch stabilizing the tube stuck in his throat and pulled the tube to remove it. He was no longer hooked to the breathing machine, and it made him cough. But he still breathed almost normally. Unfortunately, his legs and hip were plastered, so he couldn't go further. Emily got up, took a syringe into the cart and managed with the help of Christie and Antonio to tinsert it into Matt's left arm. He calmed down almost immediately, falling asleep at the time. But as usual, he wasn't breathing anymore because he was asleep. So his sature dropped fast.

"Christie, grab my pager and push the button 1. it's the one for Dr. Riley and it's indicating my position. He will know where I am and will scome ASAP".

She got up, grabbing his pager and pushing the correct button while Emily was searching on the cart a balloon. She found one and placed him over Matt's face to fill his lungs with oxygen.

"It's time to talk to Dr. Riley about my idea".

* * *

Kelly was immediately warned about the problem that Christie had with Matt and chief Boden had then given him the day to be with her and Matt. He had the opportunity to talk with Antonio about Gabby and vice versa. So he knew now what Kelly knew: Matt was amnesic, achromatic with his right eye, couldn't breathe on his own when he was sleeping and had difficulties for understanding long and/or complex sentences. It made him sick to know that Matt was actually in the same condition as his little sister, or worse: he was conscious and was making suffer his family, while Gabby was calm in this bed, recovering gradually. He knew now that Matt was injured for the rest of his life. So he left Chicago Med to stay with his sister in Lakeshore, leaving Christie and Kelly manage Matt. Emily had replaced his IVs on his left arm, and Dr. Rhodes came in ICU specially to reintroduce a new central line to its original place. After several hours, Matt was beginning to wake up. Finally. Kelly knew it because he had pinched his hand.

"He's waking up".

Emily and Dr. Riley were there too, wanting to see if the idea of the nurse was good or not. She smiled, approaching the bed, then turned off the ventilator. Finally, she removed the two tubes of the ET tube. Matt woke up very slowly, and finally he took a deep breath.

"Don't breathe too deep. Don't expose your heart to too much stress for now", Dr. Riley stated.

Matt slowly opened his eyes, looking from the right then the left, then opened his mouth. It was the first time he could do it. After these three days of awakening. He closed it, letting the tears flow down his cheeks. He was happy.

"I knew that, no longer have this tube down your throat would please you Matt!" Emily explained, thrilled.

Matt opened his eyes and planted them on Emily.

 _ **What did you do?**_

"He asks what you did to him".

"Matt? You know that the breathing machine is there to help your breathing, right?"

He nodded, still not understanding why he was no longer hooked to the ventilator.

"You really need it when you sleep now. So, I thought that... Have it only when you sleep... Would be more satisfied to you", she said with a smile.

But Matt shook his head from side to side.

 _ **I don't understand.**_

"Matt, pass your left hand on your neck", Christie ordered.

She knew that if he would understand, he had to grab things or even touch them. She smiled, giving him the green light. And then Matt put his left hand on his neck. He then felt something. A small tube in his throat.

 _ **What is it?**_

"I thought that leaving you breathe and talk as you want when you are awake would help you get better. And when you are about to sleep, you will be hooked again to the vent. So you can never run out of oxygen, and until you could breathe on your own, in any occasion".

 _ **A trach?**_

 _ **Yes Matt. Emily thought you'd be better like this.**_

 _ **I... Don't even know if I can talk.**_

 _ **Then try!**_

Matt opened his mouth and pursed his lips. He was trying to produce a sound, but nothing happened.

"Ah. Yeah. Your throat is very dry for now. We'll give you ice chips to suck to hydrate the mucus and allow your vocal cords to heal. You would emit a sound a lot faster than you think".

 _ **I didn't understand anything.**_

 _ **Your throat is irritated, and ice chips are good for your throat. But for now, not a word. Wait a minute and it will come.**_

 _ **Promise?**_

 _ **I promise.**_

Dr. Riley brought a glass filled with ice so that Matt could speak, and to know if he could speak. Relearning the basics was one of the exercises he had to perform first on his former patients. So there was a high probability that Matt couldn't talk right now, but after several sessions with a speech therapist. But before that, he wanted to see how his family and friends were going to manage to help him through this ordeal. He left the room, leaving Emily, Christie and Kelly be with Matt while he was going to look some other patients. The nurse took the opportunity to reduce the dose of morphine so that Matt could stay awake longer and without the feeling of being in a thick fog. Despite the curtains closed, he could see some change of shades with his right eye. He knew what was the weather outside, and depending on the blower of the air conditioning or heat, he could also tell how hot it was outside. He raised his left arm to sign.

 _ **It's raining and it's mild outside, isn't it?**_

Christie frowned and went to the window to see the weather. She turned, surprised.

 _ **How do you know that?**_

 _ **My gut told me.**_

 _ **It wouldn't rather your right eye?**_

Matt smiled.

 _ **Excuse me, but... I could see dark shades going down while the background was clear. If it were snow, these shades would take much longer to fall, and we're in April so... It's raining. And the air conditioning isn't working, nor heat, so it must be mild temperature outside.**_

"Matt, I don't understand a thing. You can think and explain in detail everything you do or think. So how you don't understand long and/or complex sentences?" Christie asked.

But Matt didn't reply. He didn't know why or how he could.

"The processing of informations and speech perception are handled by two different parts of the brain. For Matt, there is a light short-circuit between these two. Therefore what he does, he can explain it in detail, but what is told, it's hard for him to explain".

Having turned his gaze to Emily, he tried to understand what she was saying, but he couldn't.

"What you understand and what we say, it's two different things that are connected. And these two things are struggling to connect in your head. So you misunderstand if we say too complicated or too long", Emily tried to explain.

 _ **I got it: I can explain things normally, but can't get the explanations normanny. So if it's too complicated or long, I don't get much these informations and I don't understand.**_

"It's quite that Matt", Christie confirmed.

Matt looked down. He was sick of all this. He was sick of being in a hospital bed, motionless. He was going crazy. He banged his fist on the bed.

 _ **How long I will still stay in this bed not moving an inch...**_

 _ **Matt...**_

 _ **Christie, I know you're there to help me. And Kelly too. But I'm tired! I can't support it anymore!**_

Matt began to cry, and both Kelly and Emily didn't understand why.

"Matt..."

Only Christie knew what was going on into Matt's head.

"I know you're angry because you can't move. But I promised that you would get better soon. And I will keep my word. WE will keep our word".

Emily and Kelly nodded finally, smiling at the same time.

"We won't rest until you will be standing, leaving the hospital", Emily stated.

Matt didn't know what to do or what to say. He wanted to talk so much like his sister, his brother or Emily. But did he have the strength? He bit his lower lip and took a deep breath.

"T-th-th... T-th..."

Christie and Kelly straightened in their chairs, while Emily, who began to leave the room, had returned.

"T-th... An-k-k..."

But it was very, very difficult for Matt. He was exhausting very fast. Too fast. He was beginning to close his eyes, and Emily knew he was going to sleep. She returned to the bed to program the ventilator and put it in place. But Matt grabbed her hand and stroked it.

"E-e-e... M-mmmmmmi... L-ly".

And then he took off his hand and touched the tubes of the respirator at his neck. They understood that he was grateful to Emily. To have allowed him to speak and breathe without problems when he was awake. But now he no longer was. He was exhausted by trying to say those two words. Still shocked, Emily reconnected the ventilator and turned it on, showing at the same time to Christie and Kelly how to connect it to Matt, and how to disconnect the respirator. She trusted them. She knew that they were going to take care of their brother.


	17. A decision to make

Hello there everyone! So as asked and promised, I update this story.

I wanted to apologize in advance for any mistakes because I decided to "translate" this chapter exclusively by my own (no google translate, nothing, just my head). In exactly three months, it will be a year I began to "learn english" by writing fanfictions. So I'm very proud of my job, although I still writing some things wrong :-)

Please tell me what you think by letting a review. It helps me to write the next chapters :-D

Oh, and don't worry: I let Gabby for a while in this story but it was "wanted", and she will "appear" more often.

* * *

 **CHAPTER 16: A decision to make**

Three days had passed. Three long days of reflection for Antonio. He had to make a big decision but he was afraid. He was afraid that things would go wrong. Although his sister was stable and was getting better every day, there was always a risk, a risk that this wouldn't happen as planned.

"Mr. Dawson?"

Irina was taking care of Gabby, but she was preoccupied with Antonio. He jumped a little and blocked his eyes on the nurse. He didn't say a word.

"You look elsewhere for several days. Something's bothering you?"

He sighed, closing his eyes and passing his hands over his face.

"I went to see Matt", he admitted.

"Uh... Your brother-in-law, right?"

He nodded slowly.

"How is he?"

He sighed once again.

"He... How I could blame him..."

Irina didn't understand, but said nothing. She wanted Antonio confesses to her. She finished nursing Gabby and sat on the chair near him. Without even realizing it, Antonio began to tell everything.

"I blamed for... For pushing my sister. I blamed him because she is in a coma and not him. I thought if he hadn't pushed her, she would certainly be in the same shape as Matt, but she would be... She would be conscious".

Irina listened attentively this man. He was secret, she knew it. She had immediately felt it. But even so, he indulged in her.

"When I arrived at the door of his room, I... I froze. I knew he wouldn't recognize me... And I wondered how I would see him. And I fell on his sister".

Irina took his hand, stroking it friendly.

"She told him who I was, who was Gabby, his entire life. And even if he didn't remember Gabby, when he realized that she had been seriously injured... He panicked. He wanted to get up when he couldn't, he ripped the breathing tube out of his mouth despite his condition. He... I don't know".

He passed his hands over his face again, letting out a sob.

"Body and mind are two different things. If mind doesn't remember, body does. His body reacted to the news. I am sure that he also didn't understand why he reacted like this".

"I know, but that's not the worst".

There were worse according to him. Something he had understood by seeing Matt.

"Matt loves my sister more than anything, even if he doesn't remember her. He would do anything for her. He protected her by putting his life in between. And in doing so, he... He was so badly injured that he can't be a fireman unless a miracle happens".

"His doctor ran neurological tests?"

"Yes. He... he is achromatic in his right eye, but I don't know what it is".

"It's the loss of color vision. He sees in black and white and shades of gray. It's genetic in normal times, but after a serious brain injury, it can happen".

Antonio nodded. He was finally able to put a definition on a word he didn't know.

"He also has difficulty understanding long sentences and complex ones. He lost nine years of his memory and... And can't breathe on his own when he's unconscious".

"You mean he depends on the ventilator when he sleeps?"

"Yes. But Matt's nurse had a great idea I think. Matt can now breathe on his own and talk when he is conscious, and is dependent on the ventilator when he sleeps".

"Tracheostomy?"

He nodded again. Irina smiled.

3This nurse is... Really Awsome".

Antonio smiled back.

"Yeah..."

Antonio pulled himself together, shaking his head and exhaling deeply.

"I don't even know why I'm telling you all this", he finally said.

"Because you needed it, no doubt. I am a nurse and I take care of your sister, but I'm also an ear for the relatives of my patients. And you're her brother".

"I have to make a decision, but I'm afraid to not take the good one".

"A decision?"

"Either Gabby stays here in Lakeshore, healing slowly but surely. Or I transfer Gabby to Chicago Med so Matt and her are close to each other and could ger better together".

Irina didn't understand the decision he had to make.

"I don't understand".

"Gabby needs Matt to get better and wake up. I know it, I feel it. And Matt also needs Gabby to recover. They need each other. So why leave them in two different hospitals?"

The nurse understood the motivations of Antonio.

"And... I don't know what to do".

"Well... As a nurse, I would say that this is not a good idea because even if Gabby is stable, there is always a risk. As a human being, I will tell you to follow your heart and transfer her to Chicago Med so Matt and your sister can get better. They must get through this together".

Antonio thought for a few moments, and finally smiled.

"Thank you Irina. I know what decision to make now. I know what I must do".

* * *

In Chicago Med, it was also three days of slow recovering for Matt. He began to eat some liquid meals even if he didn't finish them. Surely, very slowly, he relearned to talk with Kelly, Shay but especially Christie. But as Kelly and Shay were still on shift, and Christie left to eat in the cafeteria, Matt was alone in the room. He was becoming increasingly lucid, he was in less pain despite the steady reduction of the dose of morphine. The thick fog that was lodged in his eyes was disapearing with time. He was better. But something was bothering him for several days. He looked for the nurse button to call Emily, and after a few seconds, he managed to push the button. Almost immediately, Emily was there. He smiled.

"You miss me?"

"Mh..."

While his friends and family were there to help him talk, it was still very difficult. And he knew he couldn't speak ASL with the nurse. He had to make the effort to speak.

"P-ppppppp..."

"You want to write it? It would probably be easier".

He shook his head. He wanted to talk. He wanted to succeed, and Emily saw it.

"So take your time to explain what you want".

She came and sat down on the chair that Christie used most of the time. She stared at Matt and smiled.

"Or try to spell it".

This time he nodded. He took a good inspiration but not much.

"P... A... P... E... R".

"Paper? You want some paper?"

He smiled. Kelly, Shay and Christie had done a remarkable job with Matt so he could use the letters of the alphabet to spell a word if he couldn't say it.

"P... E... N... C... I... L".

"Some paper and a pencil then. I bring you this rigth now. What do you want to do?"

"D... R... A... W... I... N... G".

"Ah... Some memories?"

"Mh..."

Emily smiled. She left the room to bring him what to draw. She decided to also bring back a colored pencil set and what to hold the paper on a tray while he was drawing. She returned a few minutes later in the room, straightening the bed a little, not too much because of his pelvis, but enough so he could easily draw.

"I brought you a colored pencil set".

He smiled and opened his mouth.

"Th-thhh... An-annnk".

This time it was Emily who smiled as he began to take the pencil in his left hand and draw. She left the room, allowing him to focus on the drawing.

* * *

At the firehouse, everyone was tired. And everyone wanted to hear from Matt. They all wanted to see him.

"Why we can't visit Casey, Severide?" Hermann asked.

He wanted to see his lieutenant, his lieutenant he had trained formed right out of the Firefighter Academy. He had seen him grow, succeed his lieutenant test, becoming the officer in charge of truck 81. He was proud of him, but he was worried too. He wanted to see him for reassurance, but he couldn't.

"Because he is still in ICU and as long as he's there, he can't have so much visitors at the same time", Seveirde answered simply.

"And above all, people who are not family doesn't have the right to visit him", Shay said.

"Then why you had the right to go see him? And Severide too?" Otis asked this time.

"Because I said I was Matt's sister and Kelly said he was his brother".

"It's not fair! It's cheating!"

Shay began to laugh. It was cheating of course, but she felt the need to. And especially Kelly: he needed her to get through some very difficult times. Hermann bit his lips. He had something in mind.

"And if we try?"

Shay became serious for a moment. She knew what he had in mind, and she knew she couldn't stop him.

"You don't think what I think Hermann...", Kelly said.

"Yes I do. We all need this, and Casey too".

Kelly sighed. He wouldn't succeed in stopping Hermann.

"Okay, here we go. But don't you dare crying on me if it doesn't work".

They came on their trucks to go to Chicago Med. Once there, they parked their trucks and entered. The receptionist looked at them from head to toe. She recognized Shay and Severide.

"We're here to see Matt Casey", Hermann launched.

"He's still in ICU and only the family can go see him for now".

"We're his family. We are his brothers".

Firefighters were looking at her very seriously. She knew the firefighters considered themselves as brothers, but she hadn't doubted for a moment to fall on the most persevering firefighters in the city of Chicago.

"I'll call Dr. Riley to see if he gives you the green light, but I guarantee you nothing".

She grabbed the phone and dialed the number of neurology while firefighters expected a positive aswer.

* * *

Half an hour passed for Matt. He had something in mind and wanted to draw this thing to show it to Christie and to told him what it was. He had just finished the drawing, colored it, satisfied. At this time, Christie entered. She stopped, seeing that Matt was doing something.

"Hey! What are you doing?"

He smiled and returned the paper on which he had drawn. Christie opened her mouth, but no words came out. What she saw was totally beautiful. It was a face perfectly well designed, with good size, good color. That face he had drawn was smiling. Christie didn't know that her brother knew so well how to draw. Especially when she knew that at school, it was in drawings he had the worst notes. She didn't understand, she was so confused.

"W-who?"

He asked who it was. Who had that face. He had drawn a face without even knowing who it was?

"Matt, deep down, I think you know who it is", she finally said.

He seemed to think. He didn't really know who this person was. But what he knew was that seeing this face made him feel better, made him smile. Made him happy. Christie approached a little more, sitting on the chair, watching her brother carefully looking for the answer to his question.

"Think about it Matt".

Deep down, she was happy, and sad. Happy to know he had drawn someone's face whose he didn't remember, but sad that he didn't remember who had that face. Matt sighed, and his head fell back on the pillows behind him. He really didn't know.

"Matt, look at me".

Matt looked at his sister.

"That face, what do you feel when you see it?"

He smiled slightly, closing his eyes. He began to sign.

 _ **I don't know. I'm just happy. To see that smile. To see that face. But I don't know why.**_

Christie remained impassive, but inside her, she cried for joy. She wanted to cry.

 _ **When I look at this face or I think of this face... I feel much better afterwards. Christie, tell me who this person is. Please.**_

Matt still didn't understand. Christie sighed, biting her lips.

"That's... The person you love most in this world".

She wanted him to discover by himself who this person was for him. He thought. It was neither his sister nor his mother, nor Hallie. No woman he knew, and it wasn't Shay. One Person corresponded now. One person he had never actually seen, and he loved above all without knowing why.

 _ **Gabby?**_

In seconds, Christie's face lit up. And she allowed herself to cry.

"Matt, you drew the face of the woman you love without even knowing her", she said between sobs.

Matt opened his mouth but nothing came out, not even a sound. Nothing. He saw his sister cry with joy. There was a knock on the door, someone opened it.

"Knock Knock!"

It was Kelly. Christie turned to him, in tears. She got up and ran to him to hold him in her arms. He didn't know what to do. Or what to say.

"Christie? There is a problem?"

But without warning, she laughed. Apparently it wasn't really a problem.

"Look what Matt just made!"

She approached the bed, taking the paper and showed it to Kelly. His eyes widened.

"It's..."

But no words came out his mouth. He was speechless.

"Yes Kelly. He drew her face without even knowing who she was".

But there was not ust this that left Kelly speechless.

"But... From what I can remember... Matt didn't really know how to draw. And... And he is right-handed. Then... Then how..."

"I don't know. Emily may have the answers".

Kelly went out into the hallway to find her, and came back a few seconds later with her.

"There is a problem?" She asked, seeing that Christie's eyes were red, as if she had cried.

Christie pointed to the drawing done by Matt.

"Oah, that face is beautiful..."

"That's Gabby. He drew her face without even knowing who that face belonged to".

"Well... It's... It's very good news! This means that your brain heals slowly!"

"This is't the problem here Emily", Kelly interrupted. "The problem is that Matt is right-handed and doesn't know how to draw. At least, from what I know".

"Ah".

She ran her eyes on Matt: he seemed not to understand what was happening. She smiled and approached him.

"You have drawn this with your left hand?"

Matt smiled, almost laughed.

 _ **I didn't draw with my feet! Of course I have drawn with my left hand!**_

This time, it was Christie who laughed. Emily turned to her, knowing that Matt had said something funny, something that the nurse didn't understand.

"He just said he didn't draw it with his feet", she said, laughing. "It seems obvious that he drew it with his left hand".

Emily chuckled. She had been stupid on this one: his left arm was the only member that Matt could move.

"Well, it seemed that Mr. became an artist because of the accident! And his brain has decided to change its dominant side!"

"Its... Its dominant side?"

"When you're right-handed, your dominant side is the right and your dominant brain hemisphere is the left. It's the opposite for lefties. Dr. Riley had noticed that most of his brain damage were mainly in the left hemisphere".

She didn't finish her sentence. She wanted to see if Kelly and Christie understood. And if Matt did too.

"Wait... If the damages are in the left hemisphere, then... His brain made him a left-handed?"

"The brain can be amazing! It's just a theory, but... Maybe the brain did it to let his left hemisphere heal faster?"

"And then for drawing? Matt couldn't draw before, but now apparently he can!" Kelly stated.

"Sometimes after a brain injury, patients develop a talent for something that was lacking before. Music, singing, mathematics... Drawing".

Kelly and Christie understood what was happening now. But not Matt. He made it know by clearing his voice.

"Oh! Sorry Matt! I explain. Your brain balances your injuries. It makes it heal by itself, by making you work more with the parts of the brain that are not injured".

 _ **I still don't understand.**_

"Matt, the left side of your brain is damaged. This is the one used the most by righties. You get it?"

 _ **Yes. So it's the opposite for lefties.**_

"That's it Matt. It's the opposite for lefties", Christie confirmed.

"So, since your left hemisphere is damaged, the brain makes sure that you use your right side".

A _ **s to compensate?**_

"To compensate?"

Christie questioned. The brain compensated?

"Yes Matt, your brain compensates your injuries. We can see it like that".

She smiled. And came back to the question that was in her mind since she came in the room.

"By the way, what's this crowd at the door?"

Christie was surprised too.

"Oh that's right. Matt?"

Matt turned his attention to Kelly.

"There are people who wanted to see you. You're ready?"

He didn't know what to expect, but taken by curiosity, he nodded. Kelly walked to the door, opening it a little.

"It's good, you can come in".

Slowly, Matt's eyes widened in astonishment. One by one, his colleagues came in the room. One by one, smiling. They came for him, for the first time in two weeks. His second family. He couldn't help but shed a few tears.


	18. That day

Hey there everyone! I have another chapter for you! I know I will have some critics about this one, but "blame" two people (sort of) who reviewed and PMed me at the beginning of this story: I can't explain it to you yet, but I will explain at the end of this chapter (as an A/N).

You can let me a review, to criticize me, to congratulate me or whatever you want to write (or do :D), but each review will help me to write the next chapter (not fully written yet).

Enjoy!

* * *

 **CHAPTER 17 : That day**

It made him so happy so see his colleagues, those he considered as a second family. Of course, there were some heads he didn't know, but he didn't care, because they were also here for him.

"So the cripple one! How are you today?" Hermann launched ironicly.

Matt smiled, shaking his head from side to side. His mentor hadn't changed. He opened his mouth to talk.

"G-ggg..."

He sighed, seeing he wasn't going to say what he wanted. But he put himself together pretty quick to spell the proper word.

"G... R... E... A... T".

Great. It was the word he wanted to say. He smiled, nodding, proud of himself.

"If you're okay, when we're okay too", Hermann said, approaching the bed. "We wanted to see you sooner, but the doctor would have never allowed it".

 _ **And today he does?**_

Surprised, Hermann stepped forward. What Matt had just said? In shock, he turned toward Severide, who turned toward Christie.

"He's asking if the doctor really accepted".

The guys turned their head, not answering the question. Matt began to laugh slightly.

 _ **That's what I thought...**_

He threw a questionning look to Severide, who raised his hands.

"I did nothing. Really. Dr. Riley said 'no', but they came nonetheless".

 _ **Then why you knew they were behind the door?**_

"Matt is asking why you knew they were behind the door if you did nothing".

Kelly sighed then, closing his eyes.

"Guilty", he finally admitted.

But Matt didn't care, he was totally happy to have visitors.

 _ **I don't care Kelly. I'm happy.**_

"He's happy to see all of you", Christie affirmed.

The guys let the nurse exit the room.

"Severide kept us updated about you until today", Hermann explained. "We were so scared that day".

Matt looked Hermann completely lost, puzzled.

 _ **That day?**_

"Matt didn't understand what you meant with 'that day'".

Kelly sat on the bed near Matt and took a deep breath.

"The day of your accident. You and Gabby came to Starbucks on Wabash before your shift. And you had this accident".

Kelly stopped, trying to know if Matt understood what he meant. But seeing that Mat was waiting, he continued.

"We had the call".

Matt's face darkened. He had tears in his eyes.

"We found Gabby a block away the car that hit you. She was also injured and told us that... That you were below a car".

Matt had closed his eyes. He didn't remember anything, but he could understand the pain and the emotions felt in this moment.

"You were bleeding out and... And we took at least ten minutes to free you. Gabby seemed to have just a few minor injuries, and you were badly injured. We didn't know that she was hit too".

Tears streamed down Matt's cheeks. After all these days Kelly had passed with him, in this room, conforting him, reassuring him. He didn't ever know that Kelly had to support all this, and his colleagues and well.

 _ **And you didn't tell me? You tell me nothing?! You didn't tell me you had the call! You didn't tell me anything!**_

Matt didn't know why, but he was angry, very angry. He would have wanted Kelly or anything else to tell him this. Fifteen days after the accident, six days after his awakening, and no one had told him. He was full of anger without knowing why.

"Matt...", Christie said, taking his left hand.

But Matt rejected her pretty badly, looking elsewhere, avoiding the gaze of all his colleagues. Christie felt hurt, rejected.

"G-go".

It was the only word that could escape Matt's mouth. He wanted to see nobody, he wanted to be alone. Showing his anger to everyone, he threw everything on the tray to the ground with his left arm.

"G-GO!"

This time, he threw a hatred look to Severide. He understood that Matt was really angry to know this just now. And he knew that if Matt had talked, he was really in a bad mood. He rose, turning to his colleagues.

"Guys, lets go back to the firehouse. Matt needs rest".

He was lying, and his colleagues knew it perfectly. But Kelly couldn't blame Matt. One by one, the firefighters left the room.

 _ **You too Christie. I need a moment alone.**_

She stood up too, following Kelly out of the room. She had tears in her eyes, ready to fall on her cheeks, looking at her brother. She didn't do nothing, and he's rejecting her. But if Matt wanted to be alone, then he needed to be.

"I'll come back tomorrow", she assured.

She closed the door, she breathed in deeply before collapsing to the ground, crying.

"Christie, give him some time. He needs time to proceed".

Kelly was trying to reassure her when he needed some comfort too.

"He will get better tomorrow, I promise".

* * *

Matt was moping. Since a few hours, he was really angry. How Kelly dared to hide the truth, hide all this? He didn't understand. Had Kelly wanted to protect him? Did he wanted to tell him later, when he would be in a better shape? Or even worse: did he wanted him to discover it by himself? So many questions with no answers, but something else was bothering him since these few hours. Matt's chest was really hurting him, without knowing why. And the pain was increasing. At first he thought that it was just the anger, but now, he wasn't sure anymore. The pain was so hard to bear, cutting his breath now. He was concerned. He searched the nurse button to call Emily. Once again, she was these in a minute.

"Everything's okay?"

But she approached fast, seeign that Matt was struggling to breathe and seemed in pain.

"Matt?"

He pointed his chest, squeezing his own left hand to the left side of his chest, wanting to indicate where was the pain.

"Your chest is hurting you?"

No time to nod, she rushed to his left side to poke the area, retiring his gown.

"N-nnnot... G-good".

He passed his left hand urgently over his mouth while closing his eyes. Emily understand quickly and searched a bowl. She graabed one and put it at the level of his lips. Movind his hand aside, he threw up almost immediately in the bowl. The pain had so high. At the same time, the monitor began to sound and Matt was beginning to have some arrythmia.

"I call the cardiologist".

She stepped back to push the big blue button behind the bed, the one that indicated a code blue. She programmed then the breathing machine and hooked it to Matt. He wanted to stop her, but he had no strength anymore.

"Matt, I know you don't want it, but believe me, it will be usefull".

He didn't answer, even in ASL. He just tried to breathe as he could the supplemental oxygen given by the respirator. Another nurse and an ER doctor came into the room.

"Call the cardiologist!" Emily screamed.

"Oah, slow down! Why the cardiologist?"

"Because the repairs done when he had his aortic dissection are going! That's why!"

The doctor turned to the second nurse, who rushed out of the room to go find the cardiologist while Emily was trying to keep Matt awake.

"Look at me Matt, don't close your eyes, you got it? Don't close your eyes!"

But it was stronger than him, he couldn't fight. His eyes were closing without an effort, although he was fighting to stay awake.

"Matt!"

The doctor grabbed a crash cart, the one with an ultrasound in it and came near Matt. He wiped his gown to put some cold gel on his chest and placed the probe. He ajusted the image for a few seconds.

"You're right, the repairs are going", the doctor confirmed. "He needs to go back to the OR".

"Mat? Matt, tell me, something happened sooner? Somethign that could have triggered this?"

Matt didn't have strength anymore. But he tried, in a last effort to explain. With his left hand, he clenched his fingers, placing his hand over his face and moved it away from him with an unhappy face. Emily recognized this sign. It meant 'mad'. But knowing that Matt couldn't use his right arm, he maybe wanted to tell something else.

"Angry? You were angry? You had an argument? What?"

But Matt couldn't answer anymore, the black world had called him. The black and noiseless world.

"Damn it!"

The monitor sounded even more: he was crashing. It wasn't good. At the same time, the cardiologist appeared in the room with the secodn nurse.

"I've been paged?"

"Aortic dissection fifteen days ago. The repairs is going!" Emily explained.

"I did an ultrasound, he's not far to a second dissection".

"Call the OR, tell them we're coming. Tell them to prepare everything for a heart open surgery. And call his next of kin. GO!"

The nurse got out again, running throughout the hallways to call the OR.

"We must to this quickly before it becomes irreversible", the cardiologist added.

* * *

At the firehouse, the shift was tense. The firefighters had been called a dozen of times, for a cat on a tree or a structure fire. They all tried to regain some strength before the next call. Kelly was doinghis paperworks when his phone buzzed. He looked the screen: the hospital. Worried, he picked up immediately.

"Severide".

"This is Serena, one of the ICU nurses. Dr. Kinsley asked me to call you".

"Kinsley? The cardiologist?"

Kelly didn't understand what was happening.

"Yes. There was a problem with Matt. You have to come to Chicago Med ASAP".

"I'm here in ten minutes".

He hung up, not giving to the nurse the time to explain. He got up and ran toward his chief's office. He knocked and entered without permission.

"Chief, I have to go. Now!"

"In the middle of your shift?" Boden asked puzzled.

"It's Matt. There is a problem and I have to go there".

Boden's face faded, going from puzzle to fear and pain.

"Go. Capp will cover you'.

Kelly nodded as to thank his chief, closing the door and running to his car to go to Chicago Med, in front of his puzzled colleagues. In less then ten minutes, he arrived, making his way to the waiting room near the OR. A nurse was waiting for him, seated on a chair. She stoop up.

"You're Kelly Severide?"

"Yeah, it's me. What the hell is happening?!"

"I don't have full details, but it seems that the repairs done at the level of Matt's heart ruptured. The doctor will come here soon to talk to you, he had to do something before".

"More urgent than to save my brother's life?" Kelly stated, angry.

"That's what he's doing actually. He had to realise a part of the surgery before coming to talk to you. It was more urgent".

In shock, Kelly sat on a chair, passing his right hand over his mouth, shivering. The mightmare he lived a few days ago came back to haunt him.

"I-I don't understand, he... H-he was good when I left him sooner".

"As I understood, you had a... An argument with him?"

"Uh, y-yeah. We told him about the rescue, about what happened during the accident and... And he was very angry after that, he got us out of his room".

The nurse didn't say anything, looking Kelly in panic.

"As I said, the doctor will come soon to talk to you".

She left the room, leaving Kelly in a fear and awfull waiting. A very long waiting. A longer waiting than when he had his brain surgery. Well, from what he felt: time wasn't passing, nothing was as expected. He was in total panic, out of himself, angry. Doctor had promised that Matt was out of the woods, and now this? After twenty long minutes, a doctor got out of the OR and entered the waiting room.

"You're Mr. Severide?"

Although he knew that the doctor was here for Matt, he jumped.

"Yeah, yeah it's me. How is Matt? What happened?"

The doctor remained calm despite intimidations from Kelly.

"There was an argument sooner? Between you and Matt?"

Kelly didn't know what to say. How the doctor could know.

"Matt just had time to... More or less explain that he was angry this noon".

"It's... Complicated. Simply but yes. We had an argument. It's related?"

The doctor didn't talk, but nodded. Kelly passed again his hand over his mouth, murmuring inaudibly.

"The anger he felt let his heart bear too much stress. This stress had led to another aortic dissection".

"A new one? What do you mean?"

"To explain you simply, the repairs ruptured".

Kelly was blaming himself. He had led to this new injury. As well as his colleagues. He blamed himself to let them enter the room.

"So... There is a new rupture, isn't it?"

"Matt has a very particular form of aortic dissection: it's in the root of the ascending aorta. The injured part is directly impacting the aortic valve. The aortic root is in the pericardium, and when ther's a bleeding, the blood compresses the heart and make it stop".

"Y-ou... Y-ou can do something. Right?"

"The previous repairs ruptured as you have understood. We have to try with antother way. It's risked and tricky. To tell you the turth, we never tried it".

Once again, Matt was to become a guinea big.

"We'll use the same approach as in a classic aneurysm or occlusion, adapt the approach to the aortic dissection".

"What? What do you mean? Explain".

"When we have to deal with an aneurysm or an occlusion, we insert a stent at the level of the injured part to replace this part. It's as if we reproduce the wall of the veins and the arteries".

"Ok, so you want to use a... Stent? To replace his... His aorta?"

"To be simple, yes. But the stent will be more sophisticated than usual. As I told you, the dissection is located near the aortic valve. We need to insert a stant who can be in the aortic root AND in his heart. We have to include an aortic valve then and what to connect the coronary arteries to it".

Kelly understood nothing. Nothing to all this doctor's jargon.

"To be simple, we'll do a remodelling of his aortic root: we replace the aortic root, we add an extension that goes in his heart to avoid any further dissections".

"And... And what are his chances?"

"Honnestly? If we do anything, he dies. If we fail, he dies. If we succeed, we'll monitor him very, very closely. We never tried such an operation. I would say that if he has 20% of survival, it would be great".

The surgeon wanted to play with honnesty. He knew that the neurologist had this problem with Kelly when Matt was brain dead. He didn't want to live the same thing.

"And... If he survives?"

Kelly wanted to have every parameters in hand. He iddn't want to make the wrong decision.

"If he survices, he will remain in an induced coma the time to see how his body and heart will react the the stent. If everything looks good, we'll reduce very slowly and gradually the sedation. He will remain hooked to a breathing machine the time for his heart to get used to his spontaneous breathing. We'll monitor Matt very closely if it works. As I said, we never really tried this".

"Why? Why you never tried this... This approach?"

"Because a dissection of the aortic root doesn't run at all street corners. When a cardiologist surgeon is dealing with this, we can say he saw everything in his career. We don't use the stent technology for a long time. Dissection is the second phase of an aneurysm, it won't modify the approach too much".

Kelly sighed, passing his hands through his hair. He didn't know what to do. On one side, he didn't want to say goodbye to his brother, he didn't want to watch him suffer like hell and be a guinea pig. But on the other hand, he wanted to see him alive, beside him, enjoying his life. What Matt would have done? He knew him very well, but he had never found himself in such a situation. What he would have done?

"I don't know what Matt would have done. I want to have my brother beside me, but on the other hand, I don't want to see him as a guinea pig again".

"He isn't for me. I just want him to have the best chance to make it. I've never seen a dissection as close to the heart. It's our unkown thing".

Kelly inhaled deeply, closing his eyes.

"How bad he is right now?"

"We hooked him on bypass, to avoid a too much blood loss because of the dissection. We're waiting your green light or not to proceed to the rest of the surgery".

"If... If he's on bypass, then... Then his heart isn't beating, right?"

"If I can reassure you, the dissection didn't stop his heart, we did. He was still beating when we entered the OR. He has a stable BP, a good sature, a strong brain activity, everything looks good except for the unbeating heart".

Kelly nodded, closing his eyes once again.

"I can... I can stay in the observation room? I just ask you this".

"You know the protocol sir. You can't".

"Then it's a no. If I can see him during the operation, then do the operation. Otherwise it's a no".

Kelly was firm. He knew that the doctor wanted to save Matt, but also try this new approach. He knew he would accept. The doctor sighed.

"Alright, but a nurse will stay with you in the observation room".

"That's all I'm asking. See my brother", he assured. "Do your... Your tweaking, but save my little brother".

"That's what I want. I'll do my best".

* * *

A/N: Now I will explain why I did this: I had a review and a PM months ago: one wanted Matt "not out of the woods yet", and another one explained to me that an aortic rupture doesn't really heal like that. SO I made some research and found some articles talking about it. And I accepted their "wishes"!

And I didn't use any help for translation (except the medical jargon, but I tried to do it alone), so sorry for any mistakes written!


	19. The culprit

Hello everyone! I hope you're in good shape today and you're having or will have a very good day. I have a new chapter for you :-)

I'm not really proud of this translation because the end is a tiny bit complicated, and I'm not good enough to translate well, but I expect you to understand what I meant (hopefully).

Thank you for the review you let me, I really enjoyed reading them and they helped me to write this one and I will also help me to write the next chapters (with your wishes, your remarks, etc.)

Have a good day and a good reading!

* * *

 **Chapter 18 : The culprit**

Before Kelly entered the observating room, he froze. He was scared, scared to see again his best friend fighting for his life. And above all, he felt guilty. Guilty to have explained this rescue, because this story had been the trigger of this new aortic dissection. He sighed while his hand reached the door, then he felt a hand on his shoulder. Instinctively, he turned. It was Serena, the nurse who were accompanying him. She was smiling at him, but he didn't need this. Not today. Not now.

« It will seem rude, but don't smile foolishly at me. It won't work ».

Serena swallowed her smile nervously. She was young, and she didn't have the habit to face a guy like Kelly.

« I'm just doing my job sir ».

« I know. But please, stop it. It makes me more angry than anything else ».

She was puzzled : she had learned how to smile in every circumstances to alleviate the concerns of the relatives of her patients, or her patients themselves even.

« You're smiling although my best friend, my brother is considered... Dead on this operating room. It make me think that you don't feel anything ».

She understood what Kelly meant : this smile was just a facade, but it could hurt in some cases.

« I understand. I'm sorry ».

Kelly feigned a smile although he didn't want to and turned again toward this door. He entered, moved forward slowly before taking a seat. It was the same oparating room, the same observating room. He was nervous.

« I'm truly sorry if I hurt you earlier. I didn't want to offense », Serena assured again. « We learn how to smile in pretty every circumstances, but they don't tell us that... That this smile can hurt ».

Kelly understood too : he knew she didn't have experience, but it didn't avoid this feeling that was invading him when he was seeing a smile on a nurse's lips.

« It takes courage. To smile in every situations. I can't. Not when someone I like this much is in danger ».

« L-like this much ? »

« Friendly. Matt and I... We experienced some events that have brought us closer a lot, that bind us. I... I already lost one of my brother, I don't want to lose another one ».

His voice was calm but trembling, emotional. He wasn't really angry, he was sad. He was unhappy and his voice was like... Off.

« Mr. Casey is very special for you then ».

« He is, and not just for me. Matt... Matt is always here when we need him, for everything and anything ».

Kelly sighed again, lowering his head. He still hadn't look inside the room, or the screens. He couldn't, he didn't want to face the reality. This reality that was bothering him, that was torturing him. He already looked once, and Matt nearly died. Watching a second time, it was for him as if fate was sealed and would kill his friend.

« If... You don't want to watch, I can... Update you ? »

He didn't answer, not immediately. He was thinking. Should he face this scene that would haunt him, or should he face the real problem ? He didn't know what to do, but his anger was very, very strong.

« No, thanks. I... I think I'm gonna go. I can't watch, I... I have to face the real problem ».

« The... Real problem ? »

Serena wa puzzled even more : Kelly was too mysterious for her. She didn't know what to do.

« You... You can call me ? If I'm not here before the end of the operation ? Please ? »

The real problem... It was a mystery for the nurse. But she had to be there for the relatives. She smiled mechanically again before changing her mind, thinking again about what this man in front of her had said earlier.

« No problem, I'll call you ».

Kelly shook his head very slightly, as to thank her. It was all he could do. He go up, opened the door then left. He left for the firehouse, to face the hard reality, the problem, what had triggered this new injury. All along the way, his anger grew with each passing second as he approached the firehouse. Fortunately, when he arrived there, he saw all the parked trucks : there had been probably no call. He parked his car, got out, walked toward the firehouse, came in and rushed straight into the common room. Everyone began to look at him. In a fit of anger like he never had before, he threw himself on Hermann, pinning him to the groung and hitting him on his face without stopping. Until the screams of the other firefighters came to chief Boden's ears. Nobody dared to move : they were simply unable to. They were looking at Severide, hitting Hermann without doing anything, just wondering why Hermann was his punching-ball. Seeing this, Boden rushed at Severide to stop him. He took his arm, the one he used to hit an almost KO Hermann, then put him down to the ground in less than three seconds, trying to calm him.

« Kelly, KELLY ! Calm down ! »

But he didn't. He grunted, screaming of anger. Abode all, tears were flowing freely down his cheeks. Kelly hardly ever cried, that was what had shocked the most his colleagues. Although Kelly was still angry, he stopped struggling against Boden, he knew he would lose, he was so stronger than him.

« Brett, Chili, take Hermann to the ambulance », he ordered calmly.

« Chief, I'm fine », he tried to reassure. « I'm fine ».

But Boden gave him a piercing look so he obeyed without a word. The silence had fallen into the common room, almost : Kelly's tears hadn't stopped. These tears annoucing sadness, anger, but also hate. Boden knew Kelly : he was functionning like his father. Chief Boden knew how to handle this.

« Kelly, look at me. Look at me ».

But Kelly wasn't listening, his eyes were closed, he continued to cry. It wasn't good, and everybody knew it : even with Darden's death, he hadn't been this sad.

« What happened ? »

All knew what the chief meant : he wanted to know about Matt. Boden waited Kelly to calm down a little, still holding him.

« Matt... He... When he heard about... About the rescue, he... He got angry... And.. And ».

He couldn't even finish his explanation. His cries intesified.

« His heart endured too much stress at once... And it stopped... »

All straightened almost at the same time. They were here when Kelly had explained the rescue to Matt, they were here when he put them out of his room, when he got angry.

« He... He's in surgery, again. When it's gonna stop ! »

« Kelly, Kelly listen to me. Why you hit Hermann ? »

He didn't answer, too angry, too sad, too... In tears.

« Because Hermann spilled out », Otis announced to the chief. « He... He said that... That Casey scared us that day and... And Severide had to explain the rescue. That's why Casey got angry at us ».

Boden released his grip, slightly in shock. He perfectly understood now what was going on into Kelly's head: for him, Hermann had triggered this stress, and it was the stress that triggered a new problem with Casey's heart. For Kelly, Hermann was responsible for his condition.

« I know what you're thinking Kelly. But Hermann has nothing to do with this », he explained calmy.

« Nothing to do with this, my ass ! If he had followed my orders instead of countering them, Matt wouldn't have been in this shape ! And if he hadn't have spilled out this rescue, he wouldn't have a new aortic dissection ! If Matt is in this shape, it's his fault, HIS FAULT ! »

He took advantage of the fact that Boden had released his grip to tip him on his side and free himself to get up. He pointed to the parking space, his eyes filled with anger and hate.

« I don't want to see him approaching Matt again, that's clear ?! Never ever ! »

Then he left, slamming the door, heading toward his car to return to the hospital. His right hand gave him some pain: the pain that appeared when someone knocked something or someone else several times and strong enough. He looked at his hand while he got behind the wheel of his car. His hand was bleeding, he was trembling. His whole body was shaking in fact. He inhaled deeply and exhaled a few seconds later. He had to calm down. After several minutes without moving, he managed more or less to find some serenity and took the road to the hospital. Arriving back in the waiting room, he met Dr. Riley.

« Doc? »

« Mr. Severide! I... Thought that you would have insisted on being in the observating room », the doctor remarked.

« I had, but... I had something to do ».

The doctor lowered his gaze down on Kelly's right hand. He saw that it was bleeding, he had fought someone or hit something. When Kelly realized where he was resting his eyes, he lowered the sleeve of his jacket and looked away. He felt bad, but made Dr. Riley smile. The doctor tried to hide it.

« I bring you into thr observating room in one condition : you let me cure your hand ».

Kelly looked him in the eye. He began to understand how the neurologist worked, and he knew that he understood what that something was. But right now, he wanted to see Matt. Then he let himself nodding slightly while looking down.

« Come with me then ».

He raised his arm to indicate Kelly to pass and followed him. He opened the door and let him in. The nurse jumped and stood up abruptly.

« Doctor? Mr. Severide? »

She was really surprised. She did't know where to go because technically, she had to be in ICU.

« You were accompanying Mr. Severide? »

« Y-yes doctor. He... He has something to do and asked me to keep him informed », she justified.

« Don't justify. It's the standard procedure. You're new here, you have to get used to this kind of situation, that's all ».

He smiled at her, she smiled back.

« Could you do me a favor? »

« Yes, Doctor? »

« Could you get me something to disinfect wounds, gauze and a bandage please? »

« Of course! I'll be right back in a few minutes with them ».

Passing Kelly, Serena saw his hand. Swollen, red, flesh almost raw. He had fought against someone or hit something. She went out without attracting attention. Kelly knew that she had looked at his hand, but he didn't care. All he wanted was to know how was his brother. He looked up at the screens, frowning while seeing moving pictures that were on them.

« Everything is going perfectly well apparently », Dr. Riley assured. « His vitals are good, surgeon isn't distraught. This is a sign that everything is seemingly going as planned ».

Kelly nodded. He understood nothing about what was going on, but knowing that his brother was fine, sort of, it reassured him somewhat.

« And... He'll be fine, uh? »

« I can't tell you, I'm not a cardiologist. But I hope. Matt has been through a lot of events these past few days and pulled through almost without any worries. That would be... I will say shame and sad to not see him pull through this ».

Kelly said nothing. He didn't want. He couldn't in fact. Dr. Riley got up to look closer to what was the surgeon doing. He then took the microphone.

« Dr. Kinsley? Inject more heparin into his blood ».

« And why, Mr. neurosurgeon? »

« Because you may not see it, but he's developping clots despite heparin already in his blood ».

« If I inject more heparin, he will be temporarily hemophilia, and he has already lost too much blood »

« Then do a filling again. If ther's a clot in his heart, it won't restart despite the electric shocks ».

No one spoke for a few seconds. Dr. Kinsley knew that Dr. Riley was right, but he wouldn't admit it. Receiving a cardiac surgery advice when you are a cardiologist and from a neurosurgeon was considered as an insult in medicine. But the neurologist was entirely right, and he was aware. He sighed and glanced at the OR nurse.

« Do a filling again, it will dilute his blood and prevent other clots from forming. We can't increase the dose of heparin ».

She nodded and placed on the IV pole several bags of saline and opened them fully. At the same moment, Serena came back with the material and sat next to Kelly.

« Don't worry doctor, I got it », she assured.

He nodded and turned his head toward the operating room, focusing on it. Many times, Kelly cringed while the nurse was treating his hand, then bandaged it. He got up and came near the doctor.

« It's Normal that... It takes too much time ? »

« If I understand, Dr. Kinsley will use the stent technology in remodeling his aortic root, right? »

« Uh... I think... that's it, but I'm not sure ».

Kelly had a doubt. The anger was so great in this moment that he had no recollection of what the surgeon had said earlier.

« You blamed me for having used an experimental technology, but you let Dr. Kinsley use a technology that has never tried in such cases? »

« He told me all the risks he knew. He confessed: it was risky, what are the risks, everything ».

« I did that too ».

« But you haven't given me all the risks ».

« If we had done nothing, Matt would be dead. If this didn't work, Matt would be dead. It worked and we monitor him closely in case that something could happen. And I warned you that we have never used this technology on a case like Matt. Dr. Kinsley is in the same situation as me ».

The doctor was right. Dr. Kinsley was in the same situation as Dr. Riley, and he let him do the operation. Matt would indeed be a guinea pig again. He sighed, acknowledging in some ways his defeat.

« Don't worry. The stent technology is... Less invasive and more effective than my experience. We know more the heart than the brain. In fact, we use stents for several years and it's rare that one of them breaks after installation. This stent is much more evolved, but if it works, if his heart restarts and it beats for more than ten minutes without bypass, then the stent will remain in place. We have to just leave his body and heart get used to it ».

« And... And he won't have to take medication, nothing? »

« Technically not. But I think initially, he will be on medication to prevent any risk and then Dr. Kinsley will reduce the medication gradually to let his body take over ».

Kelly nodded, looking at the floor, then back into the OR.

« They have almost finished repairing his heart ».

« Already? » Kelly wondered.

« It's been... Four hours they are in", the doctor said, watching the screens. « They had to start before you came ».

« They did », Serena stated. « When Mr. Severide arrived, it was almost an hour that Dr. Kinsley was in ».

« And... What will he do when... When the repair will be over ? »

« Dr. Kinsley will shock his heart to restart it, then check if the stent holds and if the blood flows properly. And gradually he will lower the use of the bypass to 0 and will remove it ».

« And it takes how long? »

« The time for the examinations, and for removing the bypass, I will say a long hour ».

They had to wait the verdict now.


	20. Pain

Hello everyone! I've been "harrassed" to publish another chapter of this story, so here we go! I wrote this one in a particular POV I've learned at school (when I was on my first year in high school, I've win a high school contest with this POV by the way :D). I hope it will be understandable although it's short :)

Thank you all for the reviews you let me. It warmed my heart to see that this story is pleasing you!

It's time to read this chapter now! And thank you again ;-)

* * *

 **Chapter 19: Pain**

An unbearable pain. That was what Matt had felt when he began to be aware of his surroundings. This sharp pain in his chest that he never thought to experience again, this gene he feared but couldn't fight. He was powerless. He was frustrated because he couldn't move, his own body wouldn't obey. Everything he wanted to do wasn't working. This disconfort, he had already experienced it before. He didn't know when, he didn't remember, but he was sure about this. He remebered this thick fog that was blocking his vision, he remembered this pain that wasn't going away, but no way to remember when. He was hearing everything, he was feeling everything, but he coudn't do anything. His body had become a prison from which he couldn't escape. Focussing a little more, he could feel that something was blocking his left arm. It looked like a head, but as he couldn't see anything, Matt couldn't know. After a few interminable seconds, he was sure to feel a head resting on his arm: he was hearing a kind of snoring, and he knew them. It was Kelly. Internally, Casey laughed despite the pain. As it wasn't going away, he told himself that it was normal, otherwise someone would wave been worried sooner. Well, that was what Matt thought. It was the most sense thing that could happen. Deep down, he wasn't even worried, not at all. Wanting to further explore the world around him, he ventured through this opaque cloud that reigned around him. As he was walking, he heard more noise, more sounds becoming increasingly strong. Something was ringing regularly. This uproar was giving him a headache to the point that he fel dizzy and he thought he would faint. He decided to move back cautiously until the migraine disappeared. He concentrated on these new sounds, trying to understand what they were. After several seconds of concentration and reflection, he managed to guess what it was: it was the beating of his own heart. Weak, regular but above all here. He was alive then. Somehow, he knew it, but he didn't want to face the reality. And then he remembered that Kelly was sleepin on him, snoring. Yes, he was alive. He heard another sound, farther than the snoring of Kelly, farther even than this intermittent rattling. Matt heard like a creaking door. The snoring stopped, this weight on his left arm disappeared, he heard someone coughing slightly.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't want to wake you".

A woman just talked. It was a voice he'd already heard somewhere. Matt was sure.

"It's nothing Emily. It's six in the morning, I used to wake up at this hour".

Kelly just answered. 6AM then. In his last memory, it was daylight and it was also the morning. Maybe ten. He suddenly jumped: someone was removing the top of the clothe he was wearing, and he felt as if someone was tiring his skin, pulling it in all directions.

"The incision seems to heal slowly and properly. The drains aren't clogged and are still in place".

Drains? In his memories, Matt didn't have drains anymore. The doctor had removed them when he began to breathe on his own without any big problems. Once again, he concentrated on what might have happened. Flashes entered his head. His argument with Kelly, the pain lacerating his chest, the nurse trying to explain that the repairs to his heart broke... He had another heart surgery, explaining the pain. Something small, round and cold came into one of his ear and bipped several seconds later. From what he was feeling, it looked like a thermometer.

"His body temperature is stable".

"Still too high then..."

By the sound of his voice, Matt could tell that Kelly was worried. Really worried. But Matt wasn't.

"It's pretty normal to develop a slight fever after what his body went through. He needs time to recover".

The nurse's voice was soft, reassuring. But knowing Kelly by heart, it wouldn't appease him at all.

"But it's been four days Emily. Four days he had this... This surgery. His fever should have fallen, even a little, right?"

He was right: Kelly was very worried.

"We'll do a new complete blood workup again. If he develops any infection, we'll know. But for now, nothing proves that there is an infection. His body is dealing with this new foreign body now within it. As I told you, it takes time".

"How much time? Days, weeks? Months?"

A heavy silence fell. And Matt felt increasingly bad: it had been four days that his body was resting, trying to get used to this foreign body he didn't know, in vain for the time being.

"Generally, patients aren't put in an induced coma. We wake them up a few hours after the surgery. But Matt had a surgery that nobody had tempted before, and as far as we can tell, it's working. He has no arrythmia for about five hours, his fever is stable, his blood circulation works properly, his body is functionning normally. Everything is okay Kelly".

"Then why you don't wake him up? Why you don't reduce sedation?"

"Dr. Kinsley already passed earlier while you were sleeping. He gave his consent to start reducing sedation. It was lowered to about a quarter".

That was why he could hear and feel everything around him. They reduced sedation and he was waking up. Kelly didn't seem to dare to answer. After all, he was sleeping when all this happened.

"Why I haven't been informed sooner?"

"Dr. Kinsley wanted to let your sleep. You barely closed your eyes these past four days, you needed rest as much as possible. Matt will need you in top form when he wakes up".

Matt could heat a sigh from Kelly. It meant that he knew he was wrong and he was going to apologize.

"I'm sorry Emily. I'm just... I'm just worry, that's all".

"I get it, I understand you behavior. I think I would react the same way as you. Maybe even worse!"

The nurse that was taking take and curing him laughed softly. It was a very light but communicative laugh. He knew that Kelly had a smile on his face.

"You... Do you think, uh... Do you think that Matt can hear us?"

Casey could feel the nurse continue providing her care while answering as calmly as possible.

"There is a high possibility, indeed. Many studies state and prove that patients can hear and feel what's going on around them when they are in a coma, even induced".

"T-then... He can hear us?"

"I think so, but it may be that the body doesn't assimilate its environment. Patients generally say that they fekt everything, heard everything, but didn't really know where they were in space".

He knew where he was: he was in a hospital bed, in ICU, it was six in the morning and it was four days he had been placed in a coma. Today's date was therefore Tuesday, April 29th, 2014. Twenty days passed then after his car accident and he still couldn't remember anything. He knew that he was lying in bed, his legs still plastered from thighs to toes, his pelvis was still placed in a special splint, his right arm was still casted, and he had still this tube into his throat and he wasn't breathing on his own. But he didn't care. At least he was alive.

"If... If I talk to him right now, then he... He will hear me".

"You can try? When he wakes up, you can ask him if he remembers?"

Although he didn't see him, he could tell that Kelly nodded. He knew him so much that even in this fog, he could know what he was doing or going to do. He felt a twinge on his arm, probably Emily taking his blood for her blood workup, and he also felt that Kelly took his hand and squeezed it very slightly. His hand was warm, slightly trembling. He heard him take a deep breath and exhale.

"When you wake up, I promise that... That I'll buy you a dog. Or a cat, as you want. So that it keeps you company and helps you to turn the corner".

It made Matt smile. He wouldn't forget this for anything. Because he knew perfectly that Kelly said this because he thought he wouldn't hear. He didn't really believe that people in a coma could really hear everything and feel everything. He was going to have a big surprise when he awoke.


	21. Here

Hello everyone! Hope you're having a good day :-)

I have to thank you for the review you let me for the last chapter I wrote! I didn't reply to them, but thanks to them I decided to write a new chapter with this POV. This time, it's not Matt's POV, it's Kelly's.

Reach the 100 reviews together! Thank you for your support!

* * *

 **Chapter 20 : Here**

Kelly was smiling, simply smiling. He was talking to his best friend indeed, but he was just asleep. He couldn't hear him, it was sure. How could he? He was in a coma, and in a coma, body acted as if it's sleeping: not hearing, not miving, just sleeping. Depp down, Kelly told himself that Matt couldn't hear what he said, then tell him he would buy a dog or a cat when he would be awake, he was safe. He was in his mind, watching his still closed eyes brother, waiting his time to wake up. It wouldn't take long. A quarter of sedation, it meant that Matt would start to move soon, frown, even open his eyes for some microseconds with any chance. With any chance. Matt was lucky: he'd survived the accident depsite the force of the impact, he had been brain dead for about four hours before coming back, he held off two aortic dissections. It wasn't a damn sedation that would prevent him from opening his eyes. What Kelly feared the most was that Matt would start again to fight the breathing machine. Emily had guaranteed that it was for his own safe, to not weaken his heart but Kelly knew Matt: it would cause more stress than anything else. But he said nothing, wishing to see his best friend's reaction before. At least he was alive, and it mattered more than anything in this world. He had already lsot Andy, out of question to lose Matt. He heard someone knock on the door and enter. He didn't move his eyes still fixed on the inert form in this hospital bed. He didn't even swayed an eyebrow when that person came to his side and sat down on a chair. He didn't know who it was, and he didn't care. He was mesmerized, hypnotized by Matt. Even this hand on his left shoulder made him jump.

"How is he?"

He knew this voice, he recognized it. He knew it by heart, Shay's voice, his room-mate. He loved her in secret, but he didn't dare to talk to her about it. Because she was gay. He didn't want to destroy this frienship they built together, this such a symbiosis between them just because he loved her. This friendship was almost everything for him.

"His..."

He couched, frowning because of his hoarse voice.

"His fever is still there. And... And they started to reduce sedation".

He didn't turn his head to her, but he could feel her emotions. She was both happy and astonished.

"It's... Good?"

"I, uh... I don't know. If the doctors think it's good, then... Then it should be good, right?"

"You don't seem convinced".

Shay was right, Kelly wasn't convinced. Far from it. He heard himself sigh, lowering his head slightly. He was sore from staying in this awful and uncomfortable plastic chair. He rose, shaking his legs.

"I know Matt. We know Matt. When he woke up the first time, it was... It was hard to see him struggle to understand what we were saying. Deep down, I... I don't want to see this again".

"But see him awake is the matter right now, don't you think?"

Shay had always had the right words to persuade him, motivate him, or help him make the right choices. She was always there for him, no matter when, how, why or even where, she was at his side.

"Yeah. But I don't want him to suffer like the last time. I won't support it a second time".

He locked his gae on her, finally. He felt weak, exhausted, drained of energy. Desperate.

"Kelly, go home. You should rest a little and eat something. And above all take a shower".

He looked his room-mate laugh very slightly. This laugh he liked so much and made him smile every time. From the corner of his mouth, a smile settled gradually.

"I stink this much?"

"You could wake Casey at the mere smell!"

This time, he laughed and Leslie too. After several crazy seconds, they calmed down.

"I don't want to go. If he wakes up..."

"I'll be there. And I'll call you as soon as he begins to pinch my hand. I promise".

He saw her grabbing Matt's hand and squeezing it. He sat again for a moment on the chair and looked Shay.

"You're always there for me. Thank you".

"Kelly. You're my best friend. And Casye needs you on top at his awakening. You must rest. You're losing weight by eye, you look like a zombie".

He looked himself from head to toes beofre looking the one he loved secretly again. He was so focussedo n Matt since the accident he hadn't even noticed he was drowning into his clothings. He realy lost al ot of weight. He sighed, lowered his head by shame.

"Hey Kelly, look at me".

He felt her hand under his chin, raising his head. Despite this, she was smiling.

"Matt really needs us, especially you. I know it's hard to get through this, I'm gettting through this too. But now, we need to be there for Matt. And don't forge Gabby either. They both need us".

Shay was right again. In fact, she was always right. He had to pull himself together. He wasn't the guy in a hospital bed fighting for his life, fighting against his own head to have his memory back. Fighting against himself. He was in a good health, everything was almost perfectly fine with him, and he was the one in a pity shape. Matt didn't need this, not now, not after what he went through.

"You're right. I will pull myself together. I gotta be there for Matt, and I will be".

Instinctively, he kissed Shay on her right cheeks before getting up and smiling.

"I love you you know? You're the best".

"I know Kelly. I love you too".

Kelly didn't know what to think. She surely wanted to say that she truly loved him as a friend. But no love, no true love. He wanted to test her, see if he could make the step, but have a lesbian friend who he was in love for, it wasn't obvious. He said nothing, merely smiled stupidly before leaving the room and move slowly to his car to go home. He didn't really have the heart to let Matt with Shay, but she was totally right about one thing, or even more than one thing: he was hungry, he was tired and he needed a shower. Arriving home, he rushed straight into the bathroom, undressed himself and began to look at his reflection in the mirror. He ran his hand over his jaw, stroking the beard that was grewing slowly. Since the accident, he didn't really take care of his appearance. It was as if someone had removed a part of him, part of this Kelly that everyone envied. But he wasn't this Kelly anymore, he had become a desperate Kelly because his lifelong friend was in a so serious condition so he wasn't even a 1% chance to become a firefighter again someday. He kept telling himself that Matt was a fighter, he wouldn't ever give up, he couldn't believe that Matt could one day get back to work with him. Not anymore. He tried to face this reality that scared him. He didn't show it to the others because they thought he was strong, but he was scared to death. He placed his hands on the edge of the sink, looking down. He didn't want to see his reflection in the mirror. He reached into a drawer, seeking the shaving cream and a razor, applied some and began to take control again of his body. He succeeded to not cut himself despite the heavy strain, then went into the shower to warm up and wash himself. He stayed a while under the warm water, looking at the floor or closing his eyes, resting one of his hand on one of the walls. He took more than half an hour before deigning to get out of the shower, dry and dress. But he didn't want to. He just wanted to stay in his underwear and his shirt to sleep. He went into the kitchen to eat something: he took the ham still in the fridge, the butter. He pourred some on the bread and added a slice of ham before eating, then drank a glass of water before going to his room, in his bed to sleep even just a few hours. It had been almost a week he hadn't slept in, always ensure Matt at the hospital, sleeping on his arm, on a side of the bed, to the bottom of this abominable chair. He didn't like leaving his room, every time he went out, something happened to Matt. First, the brain bleed had returned and he could have died. The second time, his heart almost stopped and he could have died. For Kelly, leaving Matt was as if the condemned him to look death in the face. Back into his blankets, he was only thinking about what could happen, to the possible scenarios that Shay could tell him on the phone. But his body was so exhausted he soon fell into a dark world in which he was going to rest...

When he regained consciousness, when he growled while stretching and gently opening his eyes, the room was slightly illuminated. He lit the lamp and sat up, blowing a little and feeling his neck crack. He took his phone to see if Shay had called, but the first thing that caught his attention was the time. It was four in the morning. So he had slept almost a day? Then he focused on the messages he had received. There was one from Shay, received at three. He opened it, read what she had texted: Matt was beginning to wake up. He smiled stupidly. He felt good, serene. In better shape. Shay was right. He stood up, dressing a jean and a dark green shirt before putting on his leather jacket, taking his phone again and put it into his pocket and do the same with his purse and left the apartment to take his car. He was hungry, but he wanted to take the breakfast for Shay and him somewhere. He stopped at the corner of a street: he just found the perfect place for this. It was a French bakery and the front had whetted his appetite. He entered and came at the counter.

"Bonjour! Je peux vous aider?"

Kelly frowned, not understanding what the man said.

"Uh, I'm sorry, I didn't understand".

"Oh! You're not French, I'm sorry! We have the habit to have just French people in here. May I help you?"

"Uh, yeah. I... I don't know what to take actually".

"Ah... Well, I can recommend you our choclate croissants, our croissants, our raisin breads or our cream puffs?"

"Uh, I didn't have breakfast already and... We're two".

"Then two of each and a dozen of cream puffs then?"

Kelly took the time to think about it then smiled.

"Ok. Oh uh... You... You do coffee?"

"Unfortunately not, but across the street, they do. It's a French colleague, if you want to ''French breakfast'' everything. Sort of".

The seller gave him a smile. He paid and put the food in the car before going across the street to order coffees. Once done, he took the road to the hospital and parked. His phone rang: it was Shay.

"Shay?"

"You slept well? You're rested?"

"Uh, yeah. Yes, thanks to... To have taken care of Matt for me".

"No need. Uh... I wanted to tell you that doctors have changed Matt's room. He has a roommate now".

"What? No, no he would be better alone. Shay, why you left them do this?!"

"You will understand once here. Room 319".

He sighed when Shay hung up on him. A roommate, and then what? He got out of the car, breakfast in hand and went into ICU again. A routine for him now. He climbed the three floors and stopped in front of the room indicated by Shay: Room 319. He held the coffees in his hand and placed the bag of food under his arm, knocked on the door and entered.

"Hey!"

But soon after, he stopped. Ther wasn't just Shay into the room, there was Antonio as well.

"Antonio?"

Shay turned to him, got up and moved toward him. Once in face of him, she took his chin and moved his head to the right. There was a second not empty bed. Curious, he moved froward it. Deep down, he knew who this person was but he wanted to be sure. He stopped, looking at the face hidden by the breathing machine. He took the full breath in his lungs then exhaled deeply. It was Gabby.

"How..."

He felt someone approaching him, coming next to him.

"I asked her transfer here. I thought that... That Gabby would need Matt to get better and... And vice versa".

He didn't say anything, surprised by this situation. Chirstie told him his visit. He didn't even think that Antonio would do this.

"What did you change your mind?"

He waited for an anwser but it didn't come. He turned to Antonio, who sighed.

"Matt. When... When I came here to see him, I was angry at him. Full of rage. He suffered more than Gabby and he was the one awake. And... And my sister was still in a coma. I was... Very angry".

Kelly could understand this. If the situation had been reversed, he would have been in the same shape, even worse.

"But when I saw him, I understood that... Matt wouldn't be the same anymore, he wouldn't be the Matt we'd known, he wouldn't be the Matt Gabby loves. I felt really bad to have felt hatred towards him while he was suffering more than Gabby. Then... Then I told myself that... That if I wanted to have my sister back, Matt would be the one to help her. And Gabby would be a motivation to him to heal".

"A win-win then..."

Antonio nodded.

"He saved my sister. If he hadn't have been there, Gabby would be in the place of Matt". And I am sure she wouldn't have survived. He... Matt couldn't foresee that a second car was going ti hit her, Christie helped me to understand this".

Kelly was listening to him carefully. It wasn't the habit for Anotnio to share his feelings.

"When we told him about Gabby, he panicked. He wanted to see her, he wanted to know if she was okay despite his own shape. Having Gabby near him, it wil help him for sure. And having Matt near her, it would bring her out of this damn coma".

Antonio had a great idea: Gabby and Matt needed each other to get thourgh this and move forward.

"Thank you Antonio".

He pulled himself together and shook his head.

"Uh... I brought breakfast for Shay and me, but I think there is enough food for three".

He smiled, sitting in a chair next to Shay, soon joined by Antonio. He opened the bag.

"Oh, French?"

"Uh uh. I passed near the front of a French Bakery and I have... A kind of an envy".

Shay plunged her hand into the bag to got out a raisin bread, then Antonio did the same and got out a chocolate croissant. Kelly tended a coffee to Shay, smiling.

"Black deca with sugar and milk".

She smiled back and took the coffee.

"You're my hero, you know that?"

She straightened to kiss him on his cheek and took a sip. He turned then to Antonio and tented him the other coffee.

"No, thanks. Had enough sooner".

They ate almost in silence, rocked by these hisses coming from the two breathing machines. It didn't bother them anymore. After twenty days of hearing just this, they were lapped.

"You... You texted me he was beginning to wake up?"

"Uh yeah. Emily decreased sedation in a half way and... And Matt began to move a little. It's still weak but he started responding to the voice. In a few minutes, she would come and see if all is well".

"And if it's the case?"

"She will decrease sedation again".

"And his fever?"

"Still there but stable. It seems to have fallen a bit though. But Emily will tell us".

But Shay barely had time to finish her sentence someone knocked on the door and entered. It was Emily. She seemed a bit surprised but continued to move towards the bed.

"Hello, you've slept good Kelly?"

"Uh... I have to admit that I slept like a baby. Almost a day".

"Quite understandable. Your body was exhausted. You were here almost every day since Matt's admission, you needed to rest".

She smiled, he smiled back. She walked toward the bed, standing on the not occupied side of it.

"And you? How are you?"

"A little tired but ok, I'll rest a while later".

"I am fine too. Better, now that my sister is there".

"I check if all is well with Matt, and then I take care of your sister".

She started to check all the machines, listening to his heart, his faked breath, then checked his temperature.

"The fever is still there, but have fallen a little. This is a good sign, it means that his body is adapting to the stent".

"And... And now?"

"I'll check if he can hear us. Can you take his hand in yours?"

Kelly nodded and took Matt's cold left hand and squeezed it lightly. Emily leaned over him and gently put one of her hands on his chest.

"Matt? If you hear me, squeeze his hand".

All waited for an asnwer, preferably positive. But after several seconds, nothing happened. Emily looked at him: he shook his head from side to side. Suddenly, Kelly felt a little pressure on his hand. Almost imperceptible but present.

"Wait, wait".

Kelly went down his gaze to his hand. Matt's hand moved slightly. He smiled and raised his head.

"He's moving his fingers".

"Unfortunately, he's still too sedated to open his eyes, but that will come later. I'm going to reduce the dose of medication again and a few hours he should open his eyes for a few seconds".

Shay, Antonio and Kelly felt invaded of happiness, of joy. They were relieved. Matt would soon go back to them. Where he belonged.


	22. The truth

Hello everyone! This story passed the 100th reviews thanks to you! YOU! OMG, thank you for these amazing emotions I felt when I saw that!

I didn't reply your review (no time), but thank you for reviewing this story and helping me to create some new chapters!

Here is the next one :D

I trully hope you will like and understand what I meant.

Have a good day!

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 **Chapter 21: The truth**

Slowly, very slowly but surely, Matt became more and more alert inside his bed. Occasionally, his hand clutched kelly's hand, and the latter smiled each time, in hope that Matt would open his eyes, but nothing happened. This frustrated him somewhat, but on the other hand he said to himself that his brother needed more time to gain strength and finally open them. A real countdown had begun. Everyone was impatient, Kelly first. He had called Christie so she could come to see him before going to work, and she came immediately, allowing Violet to have a little more responsibility at her own request and get ready on her own to go to school. Christie did't want her daughter to see her uncle in that hospital bed, scared that the vision of her uncle would be nightmarish. Violet had struggled to accept the decision of her mother, but she also understood: she did't want to see her uncle seriously injured either. Leslie had given her place to Christie, so that she was near her brother, then came behind Kelly and massaged his shoulders like he loved so much. Almost an hour passed thus, no one moved, obsessed by this form that was beginning to take life slowly. This both relieved and frightened them: how Matt would react when he would be able to understand what had happened to him? Or what could happen when he would have the strength to fight the breathing machine, like the last time? Would it stress his heart?

"Matt? If... If you can hear us, when you wake up... Don't struggle. You can't breathe on your own for now because of your heart. You need to focus on healing before taking care of your breath", Kelly tried to explain as he could, from what he himself understood.

Aware of what he wanted to do, Shay continued, seeing that he had trouble speaking, his voice shaking.

"The doctor said it would be better to not stress your heart for the moment, by letting us help you. The less effort you will make, the more your healing will be fast, efficient and huge".

Some seconds later, Matt's squeezed Kelly's left hand. As usual, he smiled. His moments of consciousness were closer. An hour ago, it was every twenty minutes, now it was every ten minutes.

"He is becoming more conscious. He will soon open eyes", Kelly said.

The grip on his hand faded for a few minutes before coming back with more strength. Kelly straightened in his chair when he saw Matt's eyelids move: he tried to open his eyes. In vain for now.

"Should we call Emily?" Christie slided into Shay's ear.

"No", she replied, murmuring. "We should wait until he opens his eyes, and then we'll see. Kelly will know when to call her".

Christie nodded and focused again on Matt. Although he was still pale and he still had this damn fever, he was still her little brother. No matter what, she promised to be there for him, as he would be for her. The heart monitor became crazy just a few seconds, and Emily came into the room for an umpteenth visit to check if all went well.

"Arrhythmia?"

"I'm afraid, indeed. He didn't have any during the gradual decreasing of sedation, but I'm afraid that be awake will generate more arrhythmias. Though we give him amiodarone to prevent any possible ventricular arrhythmias and supraventricular ones, or even auricular ones, there will always be a risk".

"And we can't increase the dose?" Kelly asked, worried about his best friend.

"Unfortunately no Kelly. He's already under a high dose, a higher dose could have devastating effects on him".

"As?"

"As a weak heart rate, neurological or lung problems. There are plenty of risks associated with a high dose of amiodarone. And a strong dose of anti-arrhythmic in general".

Kelly didn't understand everything, but he clearly understood that Emily was pretty aware in her job to explain in detail the problems a high dose of anti-arrhytmic might cause. And that was enough for him, he trusted her.

"Then... If he has arrhythmias, that's all right? That's it?"

"For now, we must wait for him to wake, which is expected soon. When he will have a new arrhythmic episode, he will tell us what he has felt and Dr. Kinsley will act accordingly".

"And that will happen when? He didn't come yet".

"He's in surgery, but he will come when it will be over. This will probably be after the "Matt opened his eyes" moment. He may be very sensitive to light. Both because of his eyes, but also the anti-arrhythmic".

"It can cause photosensitivity?" Shay stated, astonished.

"With a high-dose yes, it isn't uncommon, it is even almost all the time. It would be better for him to dim the lights, close the blinds and curtains, making the room as dark as possible to not stress him", Emily adivsed.

Antonio walked to the window to close the blinds and the curtains while Shay turned off the light and light the pilot light she had brought so that Matt could see what was happening into his room. Almost at the same time, Matt finally decided to open his blue eyes. Everyone straightened, addressing satisfied and happy smiles at each other. His eyes unfocused, they moved from right to left, up to down. But what reassured somewhat Kelly was that he didn't seem scared, he didn't seem to fight the ventilator. That was a relief.

"Matt?"

Kelly saw that Matt frowned slightly for a few microseconds before locking his eyes to the left and turn his head to this voice he heard. Seeing Kelly, Matt smiled. He withdrew his hand that was in Kelly's hand, pointed his chest gently to not hurt himslef, put his fist on his chest and shook it a bit, then put it back down his body to shake it slightly from left to right. Christie frowned, opening her mouth but didn't speak. Kelly was concerned.

"What? What's the problem?" He shouted to Christie.

"I... I-I don't know, he... He just said something nonsensical".

"What did he say?"

"That, uh..."

Christie stopped, signing to her brother, who nodded with a slight smile while closing his eyes.

" He said he prefers a dog".

Kelly rose slightly his head and laughed, thinking back to the monologue he had when Matt was still in an induced coma. No one around him understood what was happening, but with Kelly laughing and Matt having a smile from ear to ear...

"So... So you heard? You heard everything?"

Very carefully, Matt opened his eyes and nodded. He began to sign again.

"And he... Assimilated his environment very well".

Kelly frowned before being interrupted by Emily.

"I think that one is for me. Do you remember Kelly? I told you that most people in coma heard us but didn't assimilate the environment in which they are".

"Uh, yeah vaguely. It was... About two days ago".

Matt was closing his eyes every ten seconds. He was really tired.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I think Matt needs rest. He's still under the effects of sedatives and regaining consciousness can be very stressful and exhausting", Emily stated.

"I'm going to work", Christie began. "You keep me updated Kelly?"

"No problem, I won't leave this chair. But before that, I'll go get me a coffee".

"You can take one for me please?" Shay asked.

Kelly smiled.

"No problem. Antonio, you want one?"

"A black coffee with no sugar won't kill me, I can't deny that".

"I bring you this".

Christie and Kelly left the room, leaving Shay, Emily and Antonio with Matt. The nurse had to check that all was well after that gently awakening, surprising Kelly. Matt opened a few moments his eyes again and began to sign with his left arm, but also the fingers of his right hand.

"Matt, I... I do not understand these signs".

Matt simplified his signs, pointing the door.

"The door ? Christie? Kelly?"

He nodded, then pointed Shay.

"Me?"

He nodded again, and tapped his left index finger on his right index finger once, then turned it to tap a second time on this right index finger.

"Uh?"

Shay really knew what that sign meant. Emily came to the rescue.

"The last sign means love".

Shay spread her eyes and smiled.

"Kelly and I are not together. We are... Just friends, roommates".

Matt shook his head from side to side and began to sign as never. He pointed the door again, did again this sign of love, then pointed Shay.

"What? Matt, I don't understand".

"I think he wants to say that for Kelly, it's not friendship but love. Kelly loves you Leslie".

Leslie looked intently at Matt, and the latter nodded. That was what he meant from the beginning. Dr. Kinsley entered the room when Matt began to sign again. For all, including Emily, it was incomprehensible.

"Who is in love with who?"

All jumped, Matt included. He blocked his eyes on Dr. Kinsley and began to sign frowning.

"My daughter is deaf and dumb, ASL is my second language".

The doctor approached Emily and came next to her to check on Matt, and especially his chest.

"So tell me. Who is in love with who, I'm curious now".

Emily replied instead of Matt.

"Kelly is in love with Leslie, but she can't believe it".

"Ah".

Kinsley turned to Matt and smiled.

"What makes you think that?"

 _ **The way Kelly looks at Shay. He looks fondly at her... And he never really looked at a woman like that. Not that I can remember.**_

"Uh uh..."

 _ **When I was in a coma, and I began to wake up, he spoke. He certainly hoped I would hear nothing. But I've heard everything. He is really in love with you Shay. Even if you're a lesbian.**_

"Doc, what did he say?"

It was Shay's turn to be curious.

"He said that Kelly spoke while he was in a coma. He is really in love with you even if you are... Gay".

Shay was speechless, she didn't know what to think or what to say.

 _ **I'm sure of that. He's in love with you.**_

She recognized this sign he had made earlier to explain that Kelly loved her.

"You're... you sure about this Matt?"

Gently while Kinsley was examining him, he nodded.

 _ **Shay, you have to talk to him. I think he needs someone to talk to. And that will be not with me. It's with you.**_

"He said it would be better that you talk to Kelly. Because Matt is sure that he won't talk to him".

Shay was totally overwhelmed by what she had in some ways heard from Matt. Deep down, she knew from the day one that Kelly had a crush on her, but to fall in love with her? The woman with whom he shared everything? The more she thought about this, and the more she said to herself that their relationship looked indeed like a relationship, but without sex. She blamed herself for not having spoken earlier with Kelly.

"I'll go talk to him", she assured to Matt. "I leave you with Antonio and Dr. Kinsley? You are wise uh, no prank?"

Matt made a cross on his heart. The heart surgeon was going to translate but Shay made him understand that she had understood what he had said. Matt's eyes closed again, and she left the room to go to the cafeteria and find Kelly. Entering the huge area, she saw him at the counter paying for three coffees. She approached him, passing her hand on his arm.

"Shay?"

"Kelly, can we talk before coming back into Matt's room?"

"Uh... Yeah, sure".

That wasn't the anxiety that Kelly felt when he frowned, but curiosity. They sat on a bench in the waiting room with their coffee in hand, keeping the one for Antonio near them.

"Uh... I... I don't know how to do that".

"Do it with your outspokenness".

"I don't want to offense you Kelly".

"You won't offense me. I promise".

Shay shook her head while taking a deep breath.

"Dr. Kinsley can speak sign language".

Kelly was surprised, but he suspected that it was not what his roommate wanted to tell.

"He translated what Matt told us".

"He... He was still awake?"

"For a few minutes, yes. He drifted back to sleep when I left the room".

Shay ran a strand of hair behind her right ear and decided to turn to Kelly while taking a big inspiration.

"He... He told us that when... When he was in a coma, he heard everything. He heard you talking".

Kelly swallowed nervously. This time, curiosity faded and fear came, although he didn't show it.

"I would like to ask you a question Kelly. And I would like you to answer me honestly".

He dreaded the question. He had a vague idea of what she would ask. She took a new deep breath.

"Uh... Are you really in love with me Kelly?"

Kelly opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. He didn't think she would be so direct. He thought that she was going to turn around the bush to not offense him. He lowered his head, more not to face her look than anything else. Then, very gently as to hide his shame, he nodded. Shay approached him, ran her fingers under his chin to straighten his head and smiled.

"Kelly, I'll tell you the truth. I'm not 100% gay. I always said I was totally gay because I hadn't found the right person yet".

Shay grabbed Kelly's hands and looked into his eyes while smiling.

"But you... You were always there for me. In my moments of doubt, of sadness when Clarisse left me. Twice. When Daryl died, you ere there to reason me. You were there for me when there was this story with Devon. No one had been present in my life like this, had accepted me as I really am. I am very grateful for that".

Kelly didn't know what to say after that. He could not find the words.

"Our friendship is too important for me, especially now. I don't want to spoil it, to ruin everything we have".

This time, Kelly burst. For the first time in nearly a month, he evacuated all the emotions buried deep inside himself.

"You think I didn't think about it?! Why do you think I didn't say anything before, uh?! Our friendship was too powerful and important for me to break it for that! Yes I love you, from day one, but I took it upon myself to not offend you! Because you could never fall in love with me! Because you're a lesbian, which I accept, it's your choice! But I love you Shay! And it kills me to know you're still near me but not WITH me!"

Kelly was breathing with difficulty, tears flowing on his cold cheeks. He closed his eyes, understanding what he had said, what he had done. He shouted at his best friend. He stepped forward to abut on the opposite wall and let himself slid to the floor before burying his head into his legs, muttering incomprehensible excuses. Shay understood what was happening: for over twenty days, Kelly kept his emotions inside of him, his true emotions. He buried them, he remained hard because Matt needed him, but he couldn't do it anymore. He was mentally tired. Shay decided to sit next to Kelly, putting her arm behind his neck to reach his left shoulder and to hug him.

"Do you remember our contract? Rule number four?" She asked with a quiet, gentle voice.

Kelly lifted his head. His face was wet, his eyes swollen with so much salt water overflowing his lacrimal glands. Seeing that he was unable to respond, she continued.

"We promise to be there for each other, always, no matter what".

Kelly then remembered the video they did, when they were both a little drunk and made a video after an almost jealous remark from him. This video where they had registered a contract orally with four distinct rules. Kelly sighed, burying his head into the crook of Shay's neck.

"Always...", he sighed, inhaling her sweet scent.

"This contrat and our friendship bind us. It always will, no matter what happens in the future and no matter what happens in the present. This contract is a promise Kelly, like... Like a marriage contract. We promised to be there for each other, and this is the most important thing".

The two friends looked intently each other, not saying a word for a few seconds.

"I may be a lesbian, but I love you Kelly. No one has ever been as good as you with me and for me".

Kelly tried to understand what she meant by that, sending her a look of uncertainty.

"What I mean is that... That I love you Kelly. Nothing and nobody can change that. I think that... That you're the right person".

He couldn't believe it. He stood there looking at her, hoping to see in her eyes if she told the truth. He understood in her light laugh that she didn't joked, she had told him the turth. Shay really loved him with all her heart, and it was mutual. Approaching each other, they couldn't help but touch each other lips, kissing lovingly for the first time. Finally.


	23. Explain

Hello my dear readers! Hope you're still up for a new chapter.

I had a lot of problems to translate this chapter on my own. That's why I don't know if I did some mistakes (I think there were a lot).

Don't hit me for crashing Shakespeare's language!

Have a nice chapter and see you soon :-)

* * *

 **Chapter 22: Expain**

Matt fell asleep when Shay had left the room, letting Antonio handle both Gabby and his bother-in-law alone. He didn't know what to say, what to do, he was just sitting in one of those plastic chairs, between the two beds, in case one of them would wake up. Simply. It was still scaring him and hurting him to see Matt like this. Even if he was blaming him a little, deep down he knew Matt did this by instinct, he pushed her to protect her. But he couldn't get this image out of his head, because after all, Gabby was his dear little sister. During the next twenty minutes, Antonio watched over the two lovebirds without a noise. There were just these hissing coming from the breathing machines and the bippings from the cardiac monitors to break this excruciating and reigning silence. He looked to the right, then to the left, resting his eyes sometimes on Gabby, sometimes on Matt. Until Matt woke up again. Staring into the vacuum, he didn't know what to do. He could feel something in his throat, but he then remembered almost immediately why this thing was there: to breathe for him. To tell the truth, Matt didn't know if he was able to breathe on his own, even consciously.

"Matt?" Antonio tried softly.

He stayed still. Even if less than half an hour had passed, the fog surrending his mind lost in thick, he could see better. Everything was still vague, but at least he was more aware of his surroundings.

"Matt?"

Thsi voice, he heard it somewhere before. Curious, he passed his gaze to the left to sse who it was. He couldn't remember his name, but he remembered seeing him at some point in this room. And this time, his sight when further, behind this man he recognized. There was a second bed in which was laying a brown hair woman, her skin was slightly tanned. He'd immediately recognized her. In his head, he had never seen her, but he knew it was her, it was Gabby. He closed his eyes, letting out a few salty tears from his eyes. He felt overwhelmed by all conceivable positive emotions: happiness, relief, joy. They were all present inside of him just by looking at her.

"Matt? Everything okay?"

Antonio began to worry. He was seeing him crying without valid reasons and it was beginning to scare him.

"It's hurting somewhere? Y-you want me call call for a nurse or a doctor?"

His eyes still closed, still crying, Matt shook slightly his head from left to right. He wasn't in pain, quite the contrary. He never felt this good. He then remember that despite the ventilator, he could speak. Well theorically because his mouth was too dry. He closed his eyes again ad began to approach his hand over his face, hopping to explain to Antonio that he wanted to drink, even a few sips of cool water. He clenched his fist, just his thumb and his little finger out of it and he shook his fist at the level of his mouth, thumb turned to him.

"What? Matt, I... I don't understand".

Although Matt was trying to simplify this language to communicate, it was still hard to talk in sign language with a non-initiated. He opened his eyes again, searching with them something containing some water, a glass, a jug. His gaze stopped then on the plate brought by Emily the day before for Shay. And fortunately, there was still a bottle of water. He had then the idea to point this plate so that Antonio could understand better. The latter frowned, turning his head several seconds to the place indicated by Matt's fingerthen came back to its original place.

"The tray?"

Softly and very slightly, Matt nodded. Antonio got up, catching the plate and bringing him to Matt. He wanted to understand what Matt wanted. Once seated again with the tray on his laps, Matt tried to move his head again to the left, but was torn by an intense pain radiating throughout his chest. He winced, raisind his head to keep it straight while the monitor began to be crazy.

"Matt? Matt?!"

Matt rose his hand, palm turned to Antonio. This gesture, he got it: it meant it was alright. But nothing was right. Matt was still feeling his chest burning like hell, even after two long minutes. Worry, Antonio called for a nurse, and almost immediately, Emily entered the room.

"Everyth..."

She didn't have time to end his phrase, she understood what was happenning. Matt had still his eyes shut, wincing in pain, his left hand laying on his chest. She rushed to the bed, placed on of her hands on his own hand, looking at all the screens behind the bed. She then noticed that the

dose of painkiller was now too low for him to endure the pain.

"I'll increase his painkiller".

She pushed some buttons and once done, she turned her head and lowered her gaze.

"Matt? I know it hurts, but just be patient for a few more seconds. Just a couple of seconds..."

She continued to whisper to calm him down, hopping the extra dose of morphine would take effect soon. As for Antonio, he stayed there, watching the nurse doing her job, still appeasing Matt as she could. After two endless scaring minutes, Mat's heart finally calmed down although his chest was still hurting like hell. But soon after, the high dose of morphine sent him to this black and painless world.

"What happened?" the nurse asked, turning to Antonio.

"Uh... He pointed at the tray, I brought it to him and he tried to turn his head, and..."

"And then the pain startled, right?" she interrupted.

Antonio couldn't help but nod, unable to talk.

"And do you know why he pointed this tray?"

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, he uh... He signed something I didn't understand".

"Can you sign it again?"

Antonio nodded again and tried to do this sign again. He clenched his fist, frowning because he didn't really know how to do this".

"He uh... He shook his fist then".

"Over his mouth?"

"Uh... Yeah?"

"With his thumb and his little finger out?"

"Yes".

Emily rose her head, blowing a breath of fresh air into her lungs.

"You know what he meant?"

"This sign means 'drink'. I think he asked you some water".

Antonio looked the tray: there was a half-full bottle of water. He felt bad because he hadn't understood what Matt meant.

"You know, it's very difficult for someone who doesn't sign to understand sign language. Even if the person simplifies a maximum, whe don't get it all".

"But it was a basic sign, wans't it? I should have understood".

"Ok, ok... Lets have a deal, alright?"

Antonio wass surprised but let himself unconsciously nodding.

"I know the basic signs, I could come by and teach you. To Kelly, Shay and you?"

He didn't know what to say, invaded by the surprising proposition.

"Are you sure it... It doesn't bother you?"

She shook her head from left to right.

"Not at all", she assured smiling. "I'll come by later to see if everything is okay. If Dr. Kinsley comes, ask him too. We're here to undersand our patients and their relatives, but we're also here to help the relatives understand our patients".

It was reassuring: at least the medical staff was there for their patients. That changed from Lakeshore: each time he asked for help, they kind of shouted at him. Except this blonde nurse who looked after Gabby every two days. Irina. He remembered her name, but without knowing why. When he was bad, when he needed to make a decision, she was there to help her choose the best option.

"Now I took care of Matt, let's see your sister, if you please".

Surprised, Antonio jumped and turned to face this so young and sweet woman.

"Uh... Y-yes. Sorry".

"Don't be. You are at her bedside since her admission to Lakeshore right?"

"Basically yes. I took some days off. My boss is understanding. Family comes first".

She smiled, approaching the bed where Gabby was.

"Your boss seems to be a good person".

Antonio didn't reply. Voight had his moments of kindness, but he was often very cold, mainly contrasting with Antonio.

"Let's say I didn't give him a choice. Either he allowed I take some days off, or I resigned. Gabby... She'd always been there for me, always there with me when I was bad or when a case skidded. I didn't have the right to leave her alone".

"But now, she's here in this room with Matt, you can take some rest. Kelly and Shay come when they are not on shift, and when they are, his sister watches over him. You can relay on their besides?"

Although Antonio wouldn't let his sister, he was physically and mentally exhausted.

"You are right. I just hope nothing will happen if I leave her".

"We will do our best for that. We can't promise that everything will be alright when someone is in ICU. You are well placed to know that, aren't you?"

He thought then to what had experienced Kelly. Twice. The first time, Matt's brain shut down, the second time his heart had ceased.

"How's my sister?" He asked as she finished to look at all the machines.

"Well, according to her file from Lakeshore and what I can tell, she is stable. Most of her injuries have healed except for her broken wrist. As I read her file there is still a swelling in the right temporal lobe area? We'll have to run the tests again to see if the swelling went down or not".

"You might know... Why she sin't waking up?"

The nurse sighed. She wanted so much to explain in simple words.

"I'll try to explain as simply as possible okay?"

Antonio nodded, a little worried with this remark she had just let go.

"The force of the impact damaged her brain, especially her inner ear. You know that?"

"Yes, the doctors told me at Lakeshore?"

"Do they have explained that this affected area controls your sister's location in space?"

"Uh... I... Don't remember that..."

"When the location in space is affected, it sometimes happens that the person remains in a coma for a moment before waking up. The time for the brain to work again in space".

"For a moment? How long?"

"It depends on the injuries, it also depends on the blow. Even the will of your sister".

"And uh... You said that... That the brain needs time to work again normally?"

"Brain works like a phone: if you have no more battery on your phone and you don't have your charger with you, you have to wait to get home to recharge it".

"I assume the battery is the brain?"

"Indeed".

"Then... It should... Work again properly soon?"

"Unfortunately I can't tell you. Everything is in her hands now. If within one month she doesn't wake up, we might consider something more... More invasive, but... For now we are not there, and we hope she will wake up before. You must keep that hope. And Matt is here now! Perhaps this will change everything?"

Antonio was somewhat reassured. For the first time in twenty days he had answers to his questions. They told him all the time that Gabby would wake up, he had to be confident, to keep hope, but without explaining the slightest thing. At least he now knew why his sister wasn't waking up.


	24. First contact

Hello hello everyone! 20K VIEWS! AND MORE THAN 100 REVIEWS! YAHOO! I will have a drink tonight! THANK YOU, TO ALL OF YOU!

Ahem, *serious face and tone*...

I took much more time to update this story because I didn't write it before today, therefore of course I didn't translate it, BUT I also couldn't find a proper name for this chapter.

The title has a double meaning, and you will find them in this story. For those who just joined me for this fanfiction, every title is a clue (sort of) to what will happen in the chapter.

Oh, and... I cried when I read the end of this chapter.

If you can post a review about your feeling(s) for this chapter, or anything else, it would be great, because it helps a lot (writing the next chapter, because I have no idea right now).

THANK YOU AGAIN, and have a good reading ^^ And sorry for my mistakes (again).

* * *

 **Chapter 23: First contact**

Five days passed. Five long and endless days during which Kelly and Shay watched over Matt, with Antonio and his sister Christie. His heart was becoming stronger, with a more regular heartbeat, he was still having a few minor incidents but nothing alarming. Dr. Riley had run some new tests on his brain, to see if the swelling had come down. Much of the swelling was gone now, but there remained a small oedema still compressing his memorial area. Gradually, Matt was learning again language, speaking better and better, decreasingly stammering. And on the other hand, everyone was learning sign language with Christie, Emily, but also Dr. Kinsley and Matt. This would become unnecessary over time, but if Matt would have another problem or would be too tired to talk, it was his only way to communicate and be understood. Emily had also convinced the cardiologist to let Matt breathe on his own after a long debate: he could stay off the breathing machine for a few minutes a day, the time to see if his heart could bear it, but also to give him time to adjust to spontaneous breathing. Therefore, when Matt was dependent of the ventilator, he was in smart ventilation mode, as before the second aortic dissection. Since two days, he had also started to eat and drink again. It was not a feast, just some yogurt and jelly here and there and water. During these five days, Matt hadn't stopped asking about Gabby, what she kind of injuries she had during the accident, but Kelly, Shay and Christie had made a promise to each other: not tell him now, for fear of risking a new crisis and stress his heart. But not knowing was causing even more stress on Matt. He didn't really know why he was reacting like this, why he cared for a woman he didn't know. They explained to him that his body remembered her and therefore reacted without memories. This more than anything else was annoying him.

"You... Will t-tell me?"

Kelly plunged his gaze on Matt's, frowning.

"About what?"

"Gabby".

"Matt...", Kelly sighed then. "We don't want to stress you".

"You... Know what is stres-sing me?" Matt challenged. "Being s-sidelined... About Gabby".

Kelly sighed again, looked down and lowered his head.

"I get it. I will explain. But I warn you", he said raising his finger toward Matt. "If your heart is dancing rumba in your chest..."

"I know, I say stop", Matt interrupted.

Kelly smiled, nodding slightly. He cleared his throat and began his explanation.

"You already saw the video of your accident, you remember?"

"Uh uh".

"We first took care or the car, and the driver said he hit a couple. A... A part of your team did the search but didn't find anything. And the... The driver told us he heard you scream 'Gabby'. That's when we understood".

He stopped a moment, leaving Matt the time to digest what he heard, redistributing all the informations in his head. After two minutes, Matt asked Kelly to continue.

"Not far from the accident site, there is a Starbucks. Gabby and you like to go there to eat breakfast before or after shift. It's a kind of a ritual. We understood then that the couple was... Yours".

"And... You found us".

"A young woman came at us, telling us she found an injured woman, barely conscious. And then we found you. You were under a car".

"U-under a c-car?"

"When the car hit you, it embarked you on the hood on about a block, and you've ended your course under the car".

Matt was listening attentively, taking some breaths of pure oxygen. Although he didn't remember these past nine years, he was a firefighter for long enough to know that it was not every day someone could survive this kind of accident.

"Then Hermann and me had an argument about the way to free you and... And it might have caused... It might have caused you all these problems... If..."

Kelly couldn't end his explanation, but Matt understood what he meant: 'if we hadn't lost time by bickering with each other instead of saving you'. Matt places his hand over Kelly's right hand and squeezed it. He rose his head, his eyes filled with remorse.

"Kelly. I'm alive, that's the m-matter, isn't it?"

Kelly nodded, still not convinced. He was blaming himself, he was still blaming Hermann. But Matt was right: he was alive, it was the most important thing.

"I'm sorry", he managed to whisper to his bedridden friend.

"Hey, no".

Matt looked his brother annd frowned.

"You lost w-weight?"

"What?"

Kelly straightened his head to meet Matt's eyes.

"Uh... Well... I'm here most of the time, we don't eat fabulously in a hospital!"

"The... Ca..."

Some words were still hard to pronounce for Matt, and it annoyed him.

"Cafeteria?" Kelly asked then.

Matt nodded, sighing in frustratio.

"Matt, it'll come okay? You will talk again as before in no time".

It wasn't rassuring him, but he feigned a smile.

"So? The... Ca... Fet'?"

"Oh! Yeah! Uh... Guilty. Food is great there".

Matt smiled, then Kelly. Suddenly, someone knocked and two men entered the room. They didn't know them.

"Hello gentlemen!"

"Hello... Uh... You surely took the wrong room", Kelly stated.

"Nope! We're on the right one! Sorry, we didn't meet already. I'm Dr. O'Brien the orthopedist, and this is Sacha, physiotherapist".

"Nice to meet you", he said with a big smile on his face.

Matt was still looking at these two men who entered the room from head to toes. Then he turned to Kelly and began to sign. He knew Kelly learnt these signs he would make.

 _ **I don't want them to touch me.**_

Kelly had understood 'touch', the wish sign and the negation one, and he deduced that Matt didn't want to be touched by these men. Kelly took a deep breath and tried to sign as well as we could. He knew the sign for 'help' and he knew that pointing them, making the sign for 'help', then pointing Matt would mean they were there to help him.

 _ **Matt, they're here to help.**_

 _ **They won't touch me unless they tell me why they're here.**_

Kelly slightly frowned: this time, he didn't understood everything. He'd recognized some signs, but not all of them. He thought and after a few seconds, he try to explain.

"He wants to know where you're here", Kelly announced, sure about this.

He turned his head toward Matt, and a smile appeared on his face.

"Oh, yes. Sorry. We're here to take you and take some x-rays of your legs and right arm, and if all goes as panned, we'll remove your plasters", the doctor explained with a smile.

Matt's eyes widened, astonished. Remove the plasters, already?

"We... Can?"

It was the first time the two doctors were hearing Matt talking. It surprised them, but they didn't show it.

"Absolutely. Your bones should have had the time to heal properly".

"But... But it's not even a month since Matt's admission!" Kelly finally said. "Bones take much longer to heal, right? Specificly femurs!"

"That's right. But not with the new way".

Kelly sighed in despair, spawling himself on one of the chairs.

"An experience, again..."

"It's not experimental for months, and it has already been successfull".

"Then go ahead?! Explain?!"

Kelly was tired seeing Matt as a guinea big. First the cerebral defibrillator, then the aortic stent, and finally this.

"We used an infiltration of minerals found in the bone enamel to accelerate the healing. It's... It's like a bone transplant if you want. It's called bone cement. Healing is generally two times faster than usual. We just have to remove the plaster at the right time otherwise the process won't work".

"And how will you know if it worked?" Kelly asked sighing and closing his eyes.

"With x-rays. If the cement worked, then it won't be no sign of fractures. If we find just a sign, we won't remove the plasters".

The orthopedist took his file then.

"According to the recent x-rays, Matt has no sign of fractures anymore. We would like to see a second times before removing them".

"And... Then?" Matt asked, curious.

"Then Sacha will help you to move slightly to relieve your soreness. He will come every day to your PT and he'll show to your friends and family how to work with you as well".

Matt didn't show it, but he was scared and anxious. Kelly was the only one who noticed it.

"Matt, look at me".

He turned his head, meeting Kelly's eyes.

"Everything will be alright, it's just x-rays".

"They will r-remove these p-pla... P-plas... Ters".

"It's a good thing you know? It means you're healing".

Matt nodded after a few seconds and the doctor took Matt for some x-rays. He had the confirmation that the broken bones were perfectly healed and therefore, they could remove the plasters without any problems an d worries. It was now Sacha to take over. Once the plasters removed, the physiotherapist asked Matt to clench his right fist. Matt was scared but he told himself that he was the specialist and knew what was right or wrong. He took a breath and commanded his hand to move. Very slowly, his fingers approached each other until coming together to be this fist Sacha wanted.

"Excellent Matt! Now, we'll move your wrist".

Matt's eyes widened and he turned his head toward Sacha.

"W-we?"

"You and me, together. There is a high possibility for your muscles to be sore and weak, even slightly atrophied".

Matt nodded, looking down at his arm and to see what Sacha was going to do. He grabbed carefully his wrist, massaging it slowly. He asked him to loosen his fingers and try to move his rigth wrist at the same time. After several minutes and with a lot of help, Matt could now move it in almost every way, if he didn't force too much.

"Very good! One last step: your elbow".

At this precise moment, Matt froze. This time, his fear was too high to bear. He had a flash, an image who came back into his head. He frowned, thinking about this image again.

"Matt? There's a problem?"

Matt didn't talk, didn't move. He wasn't really here, present. Concerned, Sacha tapped his shoulder and Matt startled, moving his elbow without wanting it. The pain was extreme, but fadded as soon as Sacha grabbed it to immobilize it.

"Oah, take it easy, calm down...", he murmured. "You were not with me for a moment".

Matt shook his head, his head lowered again to see his arm.

"It was... Weird. It was just a... A feeling, but... It was as if the p-pain came back".

"You can explain to me? I'm the physiotherapist, but if it can help you feel better".

"Thanks... I just saw... A car and... Felt this car hit me and... My elbow was hurting me so bad".

"I see. I have the list of your injuries and I also know how you had them. Your elbow joint had been slightly dislocated at the impact".

"Oh".

"Yes, oh. Explained the pain when you moved it, and also your flash when I talked about your elbow. Most of the swelling faded, your memory will come back gradually", Sacha assured.

Matt sighed. He was still feeling this intense pain at his elbow.

"My elbow is still hurting badly..."

"Okay, I've got an idea".

He rose and took his phone to call someone. Fice minutes later, someone knocked and a woman appeared, giving something to him. He came back next to Matt and explained.

"This is a special splint. It's conceived to move your joints, but I can also block your movements if necessary".

Matt didn't understand anything and showed it. Sacha smiled.

"I'll place it, and you'll understand, okay?"

Carefully, the physio applied the splint. It came from the joints of his fingers to the middle of his arm. After some adjustments, Sacha proposed Matt to move his fingers, then his wrist and finally his elbow. Anxious, he did it and became surprised. He could move his wrist much better, but his elbow were locked.

"You... You selected my m-movements?"

Matt had finally understood, making Sacha smile and himself.

"Alright! Now, we can try your legs?"

Matt didn't realize he had held his breath, thinking about his legs. He noticed it when the breathing machine rang and inhaled for him.

"You're scared?" Sacha asked calmly.

"To be in pain", Matt admitted.

Sacha smiled, and placed softly his hand on his left thigh.

"Well, we'll do this smoothly, at least with minimal pain. I can't guarantee anything".

The physio waited a reaction from Matt. He nodded, trusting against his will this man he didn't know.

"Ok! First, we'll keep your legs straight, and we'll try to lift them the higher possible without any pain".

Matt swallowed nervously, clenched his two fists, took a breath and began to lift his right leg. He just barely moved it, but the pain paralyzed him, lacerating his whole body. He clsoed his eyes, wincing, and couldn't help but scream of pain.

"Ok, ok, ok... We'll rest your right leg okay?"

softly and with the helo of Sacha, his leg came back onto the matress in an unusual crack.

"It's nothing, don't worry. You hadn't move in a month, you have some air pockets in your joints and these pockets are now breaking".

Matt didn't understood anything.

"I... I don't understand".

"Ah, uh... Ah! Your joints are cracking because it's been a long time you've moved an inch. Better?"

Matt smiled and nodded.

"M-much better. T-thanks".

"We try the other leg?"

Instinctively, Matt shook his head from left to right, fear still paralyzing him.

"Matt, you right leg is the one that took most of the damage. Your left leg should be less painful".

After a few minutes, Matt finally accepted and lifted his leg. He frowned and lifted it at 45 degrees before feeling a slight pain in his hip.

"That's good Matt! I told you it will be less painful".

Matt sighed in relief. He felt good. The therapy session ended an hour later, during which Sacha massaged him to release some soreness muscles and break some air pockets blocked into his joints. When they came back into the room, Kelly was still there, eating a big sandwich with coke. Matt burst into laugh as he could.

"What?! I'm hungry!"

"I didn't see you eat like this s-since... I'm awake".

"First time or second time? You slept like a baby these past few weeks...", Kelly said ironically.

"Ah. Ah. Ah".

But soon after, Matt laughed too, approaching his left hand to his chest, more by instinct than pain.

"You hurt?"

"No sorry... Reflex".

Kelly nodded. Sacha was still there, taking the bad at its place, but Matt stopped ihim before clenching the brake.

"A problem?"

Matt shook his head and looked to the left. Gabby. Each time he was looking at her, his stomach was like a nest of butterflies newly hatched. Kelly had immediately understood what Matt wanted. He put down his sandwich, got up and came alongside Sasha. He whispered in his ear and the latter smiled and then nodded. He put down the left rail of Matt's bed, while Kelly put down the right rail of Gabby's bed. Then Sasha and Kelly approached the bed until Matt was next to the woman she loved without knowing her. Instinctively, his left hand passed gently on her soft and cold skin, on her cheek, on her shoulder, on her right arm, then finally reaching her hand. Paying attention to all the wires, he took her hand in his, stroking it, squeezing it gently and tenderly. He felt good, he had never felt so peaceful. But the therapy had exhausted him to the extreme and he wanted to sleep. Then he closed his eyes and fell asleep peacefully near his beloved. Kelly smiled at this scene, but Sacha panicked a bit when he heard an alarm sound.

"Don't worry", Kelly assured, whispering. "He's just deeply asleep".

Sacha nodded.

"You seem to know him, to the point to know what he wants the most in this world", he stated the obvious.

"Matt and I are like borthers. We have some arguments, but he's my best friend. He needs Gabby to get better, and Gabby needs him to wake up. Reunite them, it's like allowing them to look after each other".


	25. The first night

Hello everyone! For those who are following me on my other stories, I'M SORRY! But this chapter will help you get better: it's a nice one! I promise!

Please leave me a review after your realing ^^ Didn't write the next one, then if you have any idea, I can take them :D

THANK YOU!

* * *

 **Chapter 24 : The first night**

For the first time in a month, Matt had slept the entire night without any awakenings. For the first time, Matt felt happy, complete. It was a nice feeling invading his body and his mind. His body was moving slowly, his fingers were clenching. He felt someone next to him, very close. Although his own hand was warm, there was something icy on it. He decided to open his eyes, carefully. They then met Gabby. He got used to this source of subdued light, burying his gaze on this unknown woman. He smiled stupidly, then frowned.

* * *

 _Matt was seeing Gabby in a bed he didn't know. He was in a house he didn't remember any details. She was naked and simply covered by the sheets, he was in a blue underwear. He smiled, sighing slightly and approached the bed. He then came on the sheets, encircling Gabby with his warm arms, kiising tenderly her shoulder and inhaling her smell, placing his head on theb ack of her neck._

 _"Hey..."_

 _Just this single soft word made him smile even stupidly._

 _"Hey...", he replied then._

 _They remained sill for a second, enjoying this moment before Gabby broke the silence._

 _"You hungry? You want me to uh... I can do some fresh eggs or something?"_

 _Matt growled, frowning a little. He wanted to enjoy this moment in bed with the one he loved._

 _"I mean not that we have to. If you have somewhere to be..."_

 _Matt leaned against her, letting her know he was there and didn't want to move, that he didn't want to leave, still breathing her delicious fragrance._

 _"Gabby?"_

 _He didn't know how to tell her what he had in mind, he wasn't really good for sharings. But he took a deep breath and spilled it out._

 _"I had this chance at this year ago and I blew it. I've been regretting every since. So..."_

 _She straightened, making Gabby turn a little, plunging his gaze on her, in her._

 _"I'm not gonna grab my things and make up axcuses to get out of here"._

 _Softly and slowly, she came caressing his right arm as she liked to do while Matt were still looking at her, lovely._

 _"As far as I'm concerned... It's our time now", he finally whispered._

 _He waited a reaction, any reaction from the woman he loved, this waiting feeling you had when you would want something and you had to wait for this. Impatience won, but he didn't show it. Seconds later, Gabby nodded, closing her eyes and putting her left hand in his warm neck. He came to kiss her before breaking it, continuing to look deeply into her eyes. Her hand still in his neck, she brought her face to his, kissing him tenderly, gently. He was happy._

* * *

"Matt? Matt?"

A hand came on his shoulder, a strong and virile hand that made him jump as he shook his head to regain his senses.

"Yeah".

His voice wasn't here anymore, magically. He cleared his throat, still frowning.

"it's been five minutes you have your eyes open, and I'm talking to you but you're not here".

"Oh", he finally said, confused. "Sorry".

Seeing the confusion on Matt, Antonio were puzzled. Professional deformation.

"A problem?"

Several seconds later, Matt shook his head, closing his eyes. It was a part of his memory pretty intimate, but he was happy to remember it. Then he squeezed Gabby's hand, smiling.

"I remember", he said, simply.

Still puzzled, Antonio frowned in turn. What Matt meant.

"What? You remember everything?"

"No..."

Matt didn't know how to explain this to Antonio, his brother-in-law. He felt embarrassed about this subject.

"Uh, just... Our f-first awak-kening together, our f-first..."

"Oah, I stop you right now".

Surprised, Matt stopped talking.

"I won't want to know about your rollings in the hay or anything", Antonio explained, laughing.

This made Matt smile. He still had his eyes on Gabby, admiring the lines of her face despite this tube still coming down her throat. He was loving her deeply.

"That's why you were absent a few seconds? You had this... This flash? When you woke up?"

Matt nodded, breaking this eye contact he had with her, looking at the ceiling.

"It's... Weird. It's m-my... Second flashback".

"Your second? When was the first one?"

"Yesterday, when... The therapist removed the p-plast-ters and... We moved my arm".

"What did you remember?"

Matt stopped breathing for a second, biting his lips and swallowing his saliva nervously. Just thinking about it, he was in pain.

"The hit", he admitted with a trembling voice.

Antonio understood what Matt was talking about: the day of the accident.

"I see. If you want to talk, don't hesitate. We're here, but I can understand it can be hard for you, and painful. Then don't force", Antonio assured.

"I... I remember this... This car ap-proaching pretty fast on... On Gabby and... And my body reacted".

Matt stopped a moment, emotionally unstable. He was suffering, tears burning his eyes, but he was convinced that talking would help him feel better.

"I ran over her, I remembered pushing her, and... And the car arrived, I... My right side was burning, was h-hurting me, really bad. I... I felt my legs cracking, my elbow hurting... I don't know how m-much time... How much time I stayed on the car, b-but... But I slided... I think t-that... My head hit the ground pretty hard, and... And then it's black".

Although he talked about it, giving all the details he could, he didn't felt relieved. Tears were streaming down his cheeks, he sobbed. Antonio didn't know what to say. He saw the video of the impact, but what he just heard made him confused.

"I feel guilty. If... If I hadn't pushed her, she... She wouldn't have been in a coma, and..."

"And Gabby would have been at your place, not remembering you", Antonio explained firmly but warmly and with a soft voice. "You saved her, you love her. If you hadn't done this, I would have killed you".

More confused, Matt frowned and looked at Antonio, doubting and puzzled.

"I promised me: you promised to take care of my sister, no matter what. Not saving her, it's breaking this promise. I would have blamed you".

"B-but... You blamed me. For her shape".

Antonio sighed. Matt had udnerstood this.

"It's true, I blamed you. But it's was before knowing you own shape and seeing you. I didn't know that... That..."

"I was that bad?"

Unable to say a word nor a noise, Antonio nodded, his eyes closed and his head down.

"When... When I came the first time, I... I don't know, it was... A big shock for me. I blamed you because you were conscious, and my sister was in a coma".

Antonio's first clenched, more because of nervosity than anger.

"But your sister opened my eyes".

Antonio raised his head, facing Matt. The latter had tears in his eyes, ready to flow again. He took a deep breath and told him the truth.

"If Gabby had been hit... She wouldn't have survived for sure. And that, it's the reality. You saved my sister, the woman you love. Cling to this".

Instinctively, Matt tenderly squeezed a little more the hand of his beloved, caressing and warming it. Suddenly without warning, a machine rang, startling the two friends.

"What's happening?" Antonio worried.

A nurse came immediately into the room. Emily, as usual.

"What's happening?" Antonio asked again.

Checking all the machines around Matt first, but discovering nothing, she passed to the other side to check those around Gabby. She pushed a few buttons a dozen seconds later, stopping this awful noise giving a headache.

"So? Can you tell us what's happening?" Antonio grew impatient, worried about his sister.

"Don't worry Antonio. It's an alert I charged on one of these machines to check on your sister. If one of them is sounding, then her shape is improving", Emily explained warmly.

"So... She's improving?"

Emily smiled, then shook her head up to down.

"Indeed! Your sister shows signs of pulmonary reflex".

Raising his eyebrows, Anotnio didn't understand this gibberish.

"Meaning?"

"Meaning her lungs are starting to work without assistance".

The nurse then turned once again toward the bed, ushing some others buttons.

"W-what are you doing?" Matt aksed, puzzled.

"I will place her under the same ventilation as you, Matt".

Antonio didn't know how his breathing was working, and it made him very distraught, although he didn't show it.

"S-so... If she wants to breathe... She can?"

"Yes Matt. It also means that she's feeling your presence here. And she's hanging onto life, she's fighting".

Matt closed his eyes, relieved and reassured. He felt his eyes burn again, because of the tears coming down his cheeks. And he didn't hold them.

"Matt? You hurt?"

Matt shook his head, signaling he wasn't in pain. To tell the truth, he didn't know why he was crying, but the fact that Emily told him she was feeling his touches was making him so happy.

"I-I'm just... Happy".


	26. New sensations

Hello everyone! Hope you will like your week-end ;-)

To start it, I update this story. I have to thank you for the reviews you left. it's not "much" but it's so great ^^

I don't know if you will understand this chapter, because some scenes are very hard for me to translate in a proper english. Anyway, I hope you will like :-)

Have a very nice reading

* * *

 **Chapter 25 : New sensations**

Matt was going to live a new experience in this beautiful sunny day. Leslie had opened the curtains after having covered his right eye to not be dazzled and bring back the sunlight into the room. She also opened the window slightly. Sacha had come ealier to do some exercises with Matt and strengthen his right arm. His elbow was in less pain with time, although some brutal gestures could bring back the pain. But Sacha had a great idea: he already talked to Matt's relatives to have their approval or not. As they'd accepted, he said he was coming by after lunch and a short nap, so that Matt could regain some strength. Even Kelly had approved without hesitation, seeing all the benefits for Matt. After a small meal and an hour of rest, Sacha came back into the room. Matt had just woken up and seemed surprised to see him.

"Not happy to see me Matt?"

"Uh... I should?"

To tell the truth, Matt didn't want to be tortured by Sacha. He just wanted to enjoy the sun and hi belove. But his reaction made Sacha laughed.

"I wanted to propose something to you. I already talked to your relatives and they're okay with that. I just need your approval".

Raising an eyebrow, Matt was both puzzled and afraid.

"An afternoon at the swimming pool".

Matt opened his mouth to talk, but too astonished, he said nothing. The swimming pool? But he was still locked in this bed! Seeing his puzzled look, Sacha clarified things.

"We call this aquatic therapy, or hydrotherapy. It helps in rehab".

Still as puzzled as earlier, Matt seemed scared by this therapy.

"My wife is also a physiotherapist, by hydrotherapy is her specialty at the rehab center a bloc away. She will come as soon as I call her, if you're ok".

Smiling, Shay turned her head toward him, placing softly her left hand over his right arm.

"Say yes, Matt. You won't be disappointed. And it will make you feel better".

"And... Gabby?"

"I will stay here and watch over her, don't worry", Leslie assured, still miling.

The time to take some minutes to think, he finally nodded.

"Okay".

A big smile appeared on Sacha's face, calling his wife.

"And now?"

Kelly walked into the room at the same time with the bag. Sacha turned and faced him.

"Ah, you're here right in time!"

"Yeah?"

He passedd his head above Sacha's shoulder and gazed at Matt.

"You accepted?"

Matt nodded slightly, without any smile. In reality, he was so scared about this.

"Matt..."

Kelly had immediately understood what was happening into Matt's head. He had so much questions and doubts. He stepped forward, approaching Matt slowly.

"You trust me Matt, alright?"

Very shyly, he nodded, swallowing nervously. Kelly then turned at Sacha.

"Can I come? Otherwise Matt will panic".

Kelly had understood: he knew perfectly that his best friend wouldn't be at ease in a place he didn't know, or with people he had never seen before.

"Sure, no problem at all. If it can reassure you", he affirmed warmly.

A few minutes later, a woman knocked and entered into the room. A brown haired woman with big green eyes. Matt had immediately noticed that she was limping.

"Matt, meet Emma, my wife".

"Nice to meet you".

She shook Kelly's hand, then Leslie's, and came beside the bed, near Matt.

"So, you're ready?"

She was so warm, Matt felt less scared. He trusted her because of this.

"Not really", he admitted firmly. "W-why you're limping?"

Matt discovered that he had hit a nerve when he saw Sacha behind her making some loose gestures, asking him to not go further. First lost and disconnected, Emma puller herself together and smiled.

"You'll see at the simming pool".

Matt nodded, and Sacha asked a nurse to come and help. She dosconnected the breathing machine, allowing Matt to breathe some fresh air on his own.

"It will be okay without the ventilator?" Emily worried.

"If necessary, we have one right at the poolside. At the slightest problem, we'll connect him to it".

Emily nodded, smiling in turn. The doctors unlocked the brake and slid the bed on the floof of the room, the the hallway, going down to the main floor, where the swimming pool was. Kelly followed them with the bag, happy to know that Matt had accepted. It was a new experience, but this time, it wasn't like the others: he knew this experience because he had it when he had his injury at his neck. And it helped him so much, he was sure it would help Matt as well. Arrived on scene, Sacha explained to Emma he would take care of Matt while she was preparing everything. With some difficulties, he disconnected the catheter will on Matt. Fortunately, the surgeon had removed the chest tube and his dressings had been changed the morning by Emily. She replaced them by waterproof ones. Then, Kelly and Sacha put Matt on a swimboxer and lead to the swimming pool. Entering a huge room, the smell of iodine immediately invaded Matt's nostrils. He loved going to the swimming poll, and he missed this, but he would have never thought of coming back here to do his rehab. Emma approched then the bed.

"Alright Matt! Sacha explained your injuries, so I know what we'll do. But I need you to trust me completely".

Swallowing hard, Matt nodded.

"We'll transfer you from your bed to this special one. He can go in water and can fits your physiognomy. And then we can begin. You okay?"

"We?"

"Together! First, we'll lower the bed at its maximum level, then carefully, we'll slide you on this one and we'll go in water. Finally. You'll see some magic".

"And... And my right leg?"

"The one hurting the most?"

Matt nodded, frightened.

"Don't worry Matt. I promise that everything will be alright. The slightest problem and you stop us, okay?"

Taking a deeper breath than usual, he shook his head.

"Here we go then!"

Sacha and Emma lowered the bed. They adjusted the height required for the special bed and Matt's bed, so that they were glued to optimize the transfer and reduce any possible pain that might feel Matt. Slowly but surely, he was transferred, and the bed was soaked in water until it reaches Matt's chin.

"Okay. Matt? I would like you to trust me, alright? It's necessary".

Reluctant, Matt signed to Kelly that he wasn't really trusting her but he had no choice, making Kelly smile. Sacha and Emma not talking ASL, he explained his reluctance, and the young woman had to reassure him for about five minutes before finally trusting her. She signed to Sacha, and the bed tilted forward. It scared Matt, but slowly the bed straightened and Matt could stand on his legs with Kelly just behind him to help. This sensation of touching the ground made Matt smile while closing his eyes. He moved his toes, touchign the ground for the first time in a month.

"How do you feel Matt?"

"I... I feel... Fine", he assured smiling.

Matt had water up to the middle of his chest. He was moving his left arm, and decided to move his right one, but he was unable because of the splint.

"Now, I will enter in water to help you".

Emma removed her shirt, revealing her swimsuit. She sat on the poolside, Sacha entering in and helping his wife. Matt and Kelly didn't understand for a moment, until the young woman removed her pants. By doing this, the let appear a prothesis. Matt's eyes widdened when he udnerstood: she just had one leg. Sacha removed the the prothesis, and Emma came in, jumping to face Matt.

"We can begin now".

Feeling a nerve, Matt didn't ask any questions, and nodded. Slowly, Emma removed his plint, and he began to move his right arm. Slowly but surely. His elbow was hurting, but it was more an inconvience than a real pain.

"Alright Matt. We'll do some exercise for your arm first, and then, we'll start with your legd. Your legs are hurting?"

"No, not yet".

"Okay. As soon as you feel any pain, tell you alright?"

Matt nodded, forcing a smile while Emma began to work with him. For about twenty minutes, they worked together, strengthening the muscles of his right arm. Some movements were still painful, but the pain was minimal in water. He was puzzled.

"W-why I'm not in pain? In water?"

"Water resistance against your body compels you to force for a movement. Logically, you should be in more pain, but water relieves pain".

"Is this... Why you took this specialty?"

Matt couldn't resist but ask this question, it was stronger than him. He already saw this king of injuries like hers, and he knew they were hard to bear.

"Sort of, yeah. We can continue?"

Emma was showing obvisouly some avoidance, then Matt stopped thinking about this, realizing it would be hard to think about it for her. If she had chosen this specialty, then it was because she wanted to ease the pain of her patients, but also hers. Matt and Kelly understood this.

"Okay! Matt? I would like you to grab these bars and trust me completely".

Reluctant, Kelly forced him to nod.

"You will walk toward me, slowly and carefully. The bars are here to help you".

Matt hit a huge and high wall. He seemed lost, scared, distant. As if he wasn't there anymore.

"Matt?"

Kelly worried when he saw Matt lose all his colors on his face. He had become pale in a second, maybe less.

"You... Were there".

"Matt? What are you talking about?"

"Below the car...", Matt whispered, his eyes closed. "You were there, reassuring me".

Kelly understodd: Matt had another flashback. He nodded, but his friend couldn't see him.

"Yeah, I was there. Trying to keep you awake. In vain".

"It hurt so bad Kelly..."

Matt let out a fear tears. He felt overwhelmed because of these flashbacks. And Emma knew what was happening: Matt didn't want to walk because of this pain he'd felt.

"Matt, I can guarantee that walking will less the pain. This pain".

"I... I don't know h-how...", Matt finally admitted, looking down as he was ashamed.

Kelly then remembered this conversation he had with Dr. Riley. He warned him that Matt might have to relearn some things, as talking or walking.

"What? You don't know how?" Emma asked, frowning and puzzled.

"He doesn't know how to walk", Kelly explained. "He has to relearn. He had to relearn how to talk, same for his walking".

Kelly affirmed his support to Matt by placing one of his hands over his right shoulder, whispering into his ear.

"We'll do this together".

Emma smiled again, approaching Matt, holding the bars.

"Well, we'll face this new challenge then! Can you move you right leg toward me?"

But Matt sill didn't get it. So Sacha came to help.

"Matt? You remember our PT sessions? Leg up to strengthen it?"

"Yeah".

"Imagine you're lying in your bed for a new PT session. It's the same movement, but today, you're on your feet".

"Okay. Okay...", he managed to whisper.

Matt clsoed his eyes, focussed on this exercise made in a lying position. And very slowly, he moved surely his right leg toward Emma, resting it again to the ground.

"Very good Matt! Can you do this with your left leg?"

Still focussed ans maintained by Kelly at his back, Matt did the same movements easier with his left leg. He smiled, then laughed slightly and opened his eyes.

"You're doing great Matt! Can you lift your leg?"

He frowned, asking himself what did she meant.

"Look".

Emma grabbed the bars, lifting his knee. And then, she put it down a few seconds later.

"You can do than with one of your leg?"

Matt focussed again, raising his right knee. He wasn't in pain, but step by step he raised it. Until the pain came. He winced, Emma noticing he was in pain.

"Alright, we're going to put your leg down slowly and we do the same with your other leg".

Matt took a breath, putting down his foot to the ground, then lifted his other leg, much higher than his right.

"Excellent! We'll put it down, we'll relax and end the session for today. Okay?".

Matt nodded, asking himself what she meant by relax.

"Okay, Kelly? I'll ask you to help me put Matt on his back. You know, as to float".

"Okay".

"Matt? Can you lift your left leg the higher possible? And Kelly, can you place one of your hands on his lower back to counterweight?"

Matt was scared, but his best friend was still murmuring some engouragements in his ears, and it reassured him to have some supports. He did what Emma asked, Kelly placing his hand in the small of his back.

"Now Matt, you'll let yourself go. You will lift your right leg. Don't worry, Kelly's hand is here to help you. Kelly? Place your other hand at the back of his head please".

"There won't be any problem with his skull? I mean, it's safe?" he asked, remembering Matt's injuries.

"No danger Kelly, it's safe", Sacha assured. "You can do it without any fear".

First reluctant, he placed his hand at the base of his neck carefully, scared to hurt Matt. Emma gave the signal by grabbing his left leg, Matt lifted his right one. The faster she could, Emma grabbed it and asked Kelly to push on Matt's back and tilt his head backward. Now, Matt floating.

"Good job! Now, we'll move to this small corner and we'll relax here", she said with a soft voice.

They moved to a warmer corner of the swimming and closed a barrier. Quickly, the water was warmer.

"Alright Kelly? We'll tilt Matt froward again".

"Up again?"

"Yes, we'll try to have a seat Matt".

Together, they helped Matt to stand again, and Emma gazed at him.

"No worries Matt, okay? Sitting shoudn't hurt you because of the heat".

He said nothing, he didn't show any emotions despite the fear still invading him, but Kelly was there to reassure him, still whispering, here for him in every step. Emma placed her hands under Matt's arms and asked him to lift both his knees. Very scared, he did it, and to his surprise, he wasn't in any pain. Once seated, Kelly sat at his right and Emma at his left as she asked Sacha to turn on the mechanism. This corner of the pool was a jacuzzi. Matt closed his eyes a moment, but knowing that PT sessions in a pool were stressful, Emma shook Matt slightly to make him open his eyes.

"Don't sleep Matt, now yet".

"Too hard", he managed to whisper.

Kelly heard him, and it worried him to know that his brother could fall asleep anytime.

"You said you have a breathing machine here?"

Sacha nodded.

"Yes, you want me to bring it?"

"Yeah, thanks. If Matt falls asleep, he won't breathe".

Sacha ran then toward a smaal room and came back a few seconds later with the machine.

"I don't know how it works though", the physiotherapist admitted.

"I do", Kelly affirmed. "Emily showed us how it works, I think I know make it work. If it works like the one into the room".

Kelly pushed somes buttons, turned it on, then thought. He didn't remember which button Emma pushed to make it work.

"Left... Mid... And left... Twice", Matt murmured, closing his eyes dangerously.

This made Kelly laugh: matt remembered and he didn't. The world upside down. He pushed the left button, then the one in the middle, and finally the left one again, twice. And then, the breathing machine started to work.

"Matt? It won't be pleasant because you're still awake, but this one doesn't have a smart mode. You won't breathe on your own".

Matt nodded, too tired to talk now, his eyes closed. Kelly removed the tip of the tube in his throat and connected the ventilator to it. His chest rose and fell regularly, Matt not struggling. Kelly sighed in relief. They did it. After ten minutes, Emma suggested to get out the water to put him in a more comfortable bed. They repeated the entire procedure in reverse, from their arrival in the jacuzzi corner to their entering in water. Sasha and Kelly wiped Matt, reconnecting the catheter and sliding him into his bed as Matt was totally asleep, exhausted by this session. So tired that at no time, he had opened his eyes. After finally got in the room, they reconnected his bed and Gabby's, activating the brakes. Serena then came to reconnect the respirator from the room and all the machines and IVs. She checked his vitals to see if all was well, that was the case, sending a smile to everyone while she got out of the room.

"So? How was it?" Leslie asked, kissing Kelly.

He took several seconds second to answer, and smiled.

"Perfect", he assured, kissing her back, taking her into his arms. "I think Matt needed this. He needed to know he could do it, know what he could do despite his injuries".

Looking toward the beds, toward Gabby and Matt sleeping, they smiled.

"He will get through this. He will show to these doctors that despites his inuries, despite all the problems, he can do it. He can continue his dream. He will prove it, to these doctors who had buried him".

"You're right. He's too stubborn, he will continue the job of his dream".

"Yeah. He can do it. It's Matt. It's my brother and I trust him".


	27. Tears of joy

Hello my dearest readers! Hope you're doing fine :D

As requested by some fans (especially one who will recognize herself), I wrote this chapter today. I didn't write it before because I had no inspiration and I can't write without it (as many writers I guess). So I had a wave of inspiration this afternoon so I decided to share this with you.

I hope you will like the chapter, and I will write another one as soon as I can.

Have a nice reading^^

* * *

 **Chapter 26: Tears of joy**

 _Someone destroying a door with a crowbar, a baby crying. A place devored by flames and ready to fall apart by them. It seemed to be a nightmare. This someone, it was Matt. As a firefighter. He opened the door to the back of the living room and put down his crowbar. There was a crib in the middle of the bedroom in which was resting a baby, a little girl. He then began to approach the crib and the still crying child._

 _"Hold on sweety, hold on"._

 _He unbuttoned his gear, taking the little girl in his arms to place her on his chest and wrap her in his clothes, taking great care that no part of her body came out of his jacket. He turned around to get out of the building, but he stopped: the entry of the apartment was on fire and he couldn't pass. Despite this, to successfully get out, he had to go into the flames. He instictively presse this girl in his arms still crying on his shirt, he took a deep breath and started running. He ran toward those huge flames, jumping over them to arrive to the other side. Once done, he continued to hold his breath until reaching the stairs. He went down the first floor as he radio crackled, revealing Boden's voice._

 _"Casey! I need an update!"_

 _His voice... Matt could feel his concern. From the outside, the situation had to be very hard to experience for everyone. He took a breath, still running and screamed._

 _"Almost there!"_

 _He then looked to the left toward others apartments then to the right toward the stairs. Everywhere there were flames, destruction and blaze, but he had to act quickly, for his own safety but also for this little child's one. Asking for a ladder would take too long and he didn't have time. He had more chance to get out by the entry door faster than with a ladder, and he could feel that the building was ready to collapse. He chose the right, going down the stairs with the baby in hands. He took some heavy breaths, hearing the wood cracking because of the heat. Time was running out. Once down the stairs, he was ready to reach the exit, but a piece of ceiling collapsed right in front of him and avoided him to go further. Someone had his attention above him: this same noise he was hearing since the beginning, but louder this time. He raised his head, just to see a huge steel beam arriving ever faster on him. In an instinct, not to save his life but to protect the little girl no matter what, he arched over her while trying to throw himself to the ground. Sunddenly, this beam crashed on his neck with such extraordinary violence that he lost consciousness. He regained his senses only when his pass device began to scream interspersed by the cries of this child he was still holding in his arms. He could feel the weight of the veam on his right side and his shoulder, a sharp pain was slashing his nack and head, radiating in every cells of his body. He had never felt such pain in his life._

 _"Casey, call out!"_

 _Although he had recognized Boden's voice, Matt was unable to pronounce any word, too focussed on trying to breathe as normal as possible despite the pain._

 _"Casey!"_

 _His ears were ringing, he felt something running down his right temple, going down to his neck slowly. His mask was spotted red. He understood than at this precise moment that it wasn't sweat that was streaming down his face, it was his own blood. The shock with the beam had been so violent that he was bleeding. Everything around him was just flamed and some moving forms approchaing in slow motion. These forms came closer faster, spreading around him._

 _"Hold on Casey! We're here!"_

 _Someone placed his hand on his right shoulder to stop his pass device._

 _"Come on guys! Come on!" Boden screamed._

 _Everyone took the beam, trying to lift it to free Matt and this child crying as never. At least, she was crying, it was a good thing, it meant she was still alive. But with his screaming and ringing earms, Matt couldn't bear such a torture anymore._

 _"Come on! Harder!"_

 _Everyone yelled, giving all their strength and energy to lift the beam and free them._

 _"Come on guys! Pull him! Get him out of here!"_

 _Two of his brothers grabbed his jacket at his shoulders and pulled, freeing him._

 _"We got you Casey! We got you!"_

 _Matt didn't think: he was conscious, he felt able to walk and get out of this hell alone. So he leaned on his elbow to get on his knees, he put a foot down and got up. A wave of dizziness hit him straight. He deviated to the left as he tried to stay up the as long as possible while moving forward. He was increasingly struggling to breathe properly, his body was aching, but the safety and the survey of this little girl on his arms was the most important thing for him right now. Because he promised the mother. He promised to save her baby. He staggered until reaching the entrance, the images in front of him becoming deformed, blurred and completely foggy. Once out, the light blinded him for some mirroseconds, forcing him to slow down. He saw the grid and focussed on passing it. He felt his legs becoming weak, strength was leaving him gradually. He couldn't stand anymore. He still endeavored to pass the grid before collapsing on his knees. He saw a shadow coming towards him, runing with his arms wide open._

 _"Oh God"._

 _Although he didn't recognize this body, he had perpectly recognized this voice despite his ringing ears: Gabby. She stooped to him in tears to take the child, but Matt did not let her go. It only lasted a few seconds, but Gabby managed to loosen his grip on the girl to take her in her arms._

 _"Got her!"_

 _He looked her being moved away from him before letting go. His mission was over, the baby was saved. He felt his eyes close after yet another wave of dizziness. He felt his body fall forward and hit the ground. And then nothing._

* * *

When Matt abruptly opened his eyes, nothing seemed consistent for him. Everything was different: smells, sounds, things around him. He took a full deep breath that hurt his chest, straightening as he could beofre being stop but a soft hand at the base of his neck.

"Matt?! Matt!"

He understood nothing, nothing at all.

"Matt, listen to my voice Matt! Everything is okay, everything is okay. Listen to my breath and try to follow me".

He clsoed his eyes, the world around him was blurry, dizziness and nausea were here ans were disturbing him. He could here over these awful noises coming to his ears a very hard breathing. A deep inspiration through a nose, then a huge slow exhalation through a mouth. But above all, he'd recognized this voice, Kelly's one. Despite his shape, he knew he could trust him. Then he complied: he took the greatest inspiration he could through the nose helping by the breathing machine still in place, and exhaled very slowly through his mouth. Soon, these distrubing screams fadded, and just some beeps were bothering him.

"You're doing great Matt, keep going".

Kelly's voice was calm, reassuring, soft. He felt good despite this fright he'd just had.

"Matt? Everything okay?"

It was a woman's voice, one he knew for sure.

"All good Emily. Bad awakening, that's all".

Matt was still breathing deeply like his best friend and finally decided to open his eyes. Fighting a blurred vision again, he waited a few seconds so that his eyes could be used to the light. Kelly was beside him, squeezinf ans stroking his hand to calm him down while he saw Emily coming closer to check if all was indeed good before leaving the room.

"Flashback?"

Matt looked down then nodded slightly.

"The accident again?"

This time, he shook his head from side to side slowly.

"I... I already had... An accident with my head... Am I right?"

He saw Kelly frown while straightening. Either he was wondering something or he was puzzled.

"Yeah. Couple months ago. You fractured your skull and you had an epidural hematoma. Your flash was about that?"

Matt swallowed nervously. Just thinking about what he had seen, a new wave of nausea hit him. He barely had time to nod and sign to Kelly that he wanted to throw up. He hurried to grab a can and put him below his chin just in time. As he hadn't eaten yet, an unbearable pain came upon his stomach and chest. He place his hand on it as to show where the pain was, he closed his eyes while he was still throwing up. Everything was burning inside of him, sending pain signals everywhere. Kelly sat on the bed close to Matt, passed his hand on his back and rubbed the palm of his hand between his two scapula. He knew Matt enough to know that it was a way to calm his nausea.

"It'll pass Matt, it'll pass", he affirmed in a calm and soft tone and in a whisper.

Several minutes passed and nausea calmed down, finally. Kelly moved the bowl away, putting it in the bathroom before coming back on the chair.

"Do you think you can put words on what you've seen?"

Eyes still closed, Matt took some time to regain the control of his breathing before answering.

"When I was in the building... There was this child, a little girl. I... Took her into my gear and I got out. But... At the entry of the building, the ceiling collapsed. I protected this baby and... The beam fell on my neck... The... The giys pulled me and freed me and... And when I got out, I passed out. And the I woke up".

He felt coming on his own hand, Kelly's one. He opened his eyes slowly, turning his head slightly to the right to see his brother smiling.

"It's the first time you're talking about this call, to be honest with you. You told me couples weeks later that you didn't remember the accident. That you couldn't remember the whole day".

Matt straightened a little but stopped suddenly. He frowned, gazing at his right arm. He was moving it in every direction without any pain, he could put some weight on it without disturbance despite the splint. He then looked down at his legs and at his pelvis. He had managed to straighten without pain anywhere, although it was a torture beofre just by trying to do it. He let out a laugh. He remembered this PT session in the swimming pool with Sacha and his wife. But he didn't think to have such improvements this soon.

"You're convinced by these PT session in water now?"

He hadn't noticed it, but tears were streaming down his cheeks and falling on the sheets. It wasn't tears of pain. They were tears of joy. He turned his head to the left, watching untiringly the face of the one he was learning to know and was loving unconditionnally. However, something was missing.

"She... Isn't hooked to a vent anymore?

"Emily had consulted Dr. Espinosa, the respiraotry therapist, and they both decided that Gabby was strong enough to be able to breathe on her own and without assistance. They prefer to give her some supplemental oxygen because she's still in a coma. But she's turning the corner very slowly. She's hanging in there".

Matt closed his eyes again, taking this opportunity to let out for tears of joy again.


	28. The light I miss

Hello dear readers!

I know, I didn't update this story for a while but I had no inspiration to write this next chapter. Here it is now ^^

I have to thank you for the reviews, they helped me a lot. I wanted to give you something special. So, this chapter is in two parts, meaning two POV for the same scene (you will know what I mean by reading it). There also are medical words and I tried to "translate" it as I could.

Please, leave me a review at the end of this chapter, I will be very glad to give you some spoilers or answer your questions.

Time to read, and thank you!

* * *

 **Chapter 27: The light I miss**

A new whole week had passed since Gabby started breathing on her own. She was getting better every day, much faster than before, which meant that she would wake up soon. According to the doctors. The significant swelling she developed in her auditory cortex region was gone now, no nothing was avoiding Gabby to open her eyes. Everyone waited this moment, including Matt. He was still having some recurrent flashbacks about his private moments with this immobile woman next to him every day. Surprisingly, Matt had already almost recovered his entire mobility, even though it was still hard to get back into shape because of the healing of his other injuries, especially his aorta: recover from such a major surgery took originally time, but with his own injuries, it was even harder. When Emma was in the hospital, he came down to the swimming pool for his rehab aquatic sessions. He was managed to make Emma promise to take care of Gabby while she would be awake. She laughed at first, but when she saw that he was very serious, she promised to do her rehab, making him cry of joy. But today, fear took place in every cell of his body. Today, Matt was going to have a colorful vision, he would receive his adapted glasses. And it was just a matter of minutes before having it and try it.

"I am a little anx-xious", he stuttered.

Some words were still difficult to pronounce for Matt, but he was trying to say them. Kelly could indeed read apprehension on his face. He sighed slightly, trying to find the proper word to reassure his best friend.

"Don't worry Matt, everything is gonna be alright."

Matt saw Kelly's effort to relax him, and deep down, he was thankful for that because he felt better. But what he feared the most wasn't those glasses. It was something else.

"Kelly... I'm used to my sight now. I... I don't know whether I want it change again or not", he finally admitted.

He looked down, as if he was ashamed of what he just said. Matt had trained his new vision in black and white, he knew how it worked. And because of those glasses, he was going to see in color again, and he didn't want it. He wanted to see in shade. He was fine with this, he had an advantage over others.

"Matt... If you don't want it, then don't. It's that simple. But before taking your final decision, I want you to try. Please."

Deep down, he wanted to have his vision back, he wanted to tell himself that he had a chance of coming back at the firehouse. But he also knew that his new vision was a challenge: the least fire and he was blind with his right eye, and this little blind spot everything had become a gulf that might kill him and his team.

"Kelly... Even though I have my vision back... I can't be a firefighter anymore."

Kelly raised his head, his eyes wide open, puzzled and surprised.

"W-what do you mean?"

"Kelly. DO you think that they will allow me to go back to work when a slight light source, I become blind?"

"Partially blind", Kelly corrected politely.

"You know what I meant. Blind means a danger for me and also my team and yours. I don't want to risk the life of my men, I can't."

"Matt, there are numerous solutions to rectify your vision. The ophthalmologist is coming soon, we can ask him, alright?"

But Matt didn't want to. He had accepted his new different life, meaning not being a firefighter anymore, he wanted to move forward. But not Kelly. He couldn't believe that this was over, he didn't want to. For him, his best friend was in one of his bad day and he would pull himself together.

"Ok", Matt simple replied, not insisting.

He could see that he was losing his time trying to convince Kelly that his career was over. Suddenly, Matt frowned discreetly, or at least he thought. He had still his hand in Gabby's one, hoping for her awakening and this time, something was different. He could feel a slight movement. Seeing this little change of behavior, Kelly was puzzled.

"Something's wrong Matt?"

Matt squeezed her hand harder, as to tell to this woman next to him that he was there and that he was waiting for her. He didn't want to make Kelly crazy, so he decided to shut up.

"I just... Want her to be awake, to open her eyes and... Tell me that everything is fine and gonna be fine."

In a way, it wasn't a lie, he really wished with his heart to see her eyes plunging in his own gaze. He wanted to see her face illuminate rather than seeing a statue, he wanted to love her as he seemed to love her in his memories rather than waiting again nod again.

"She's gonna wake up. Believe in this. She's too stubborn to not wake up", Kelly affirmed.

This made Matt laugh: in his memory, Gabby was indeed very stubborn and knew what she wanted. And she always got what she wanted, no matter how. As the fact of becoming a firefighter.

"You're right. She's stubborn."

Once again, Gabby'sh and squeezed his hand, stronger this time. As to say 'be careful of what you're saying, I hear you'. This delighted Matt because he knew that she could hear him, doctors told them that this was a huge possibility. But once again he said nothing. Because he didn't want to give false hope to his friends, especially Antonio. Someone knocked and a young doctor entered. The ophthalmologist.

"Hi Matt ! How are you today ?"

"Good, thanks."

He then turned his gaze on Gabby, leaving the physician puzzled.

"Don't worry doc. He spends all his free time watching her", Kelly explained in a laugh. "Apparently, it's called love."

"Yeah, indeed", Dr. Bradigan confirmed, entering in Kelly's game. "And then you can't get rid of this disease..."

The two men burst into laugh. Not Matt, too focused on Gabby's absolutely perfect face. He had relearnt to know her, and from what he knew and felt, he was still in love with her and he couldn't take his eyes off her.

"Her breathing seems faster", Matt noticed out loud.

It didn't make sense for Kelly but for the doctor, it was another story. He was an ophthalmologist, but a doctor after all.

"For how long she's in a coma?"

"A little over a month. It was a deep coma, but the neurosurgeon told us that it's a light one now."

"You... Do you know her GCS?"

"Huh... I think it's 7... 5 fir her motor response, 1 for her verbal response and 1 for her eye opening."

"Mh... In that case, if her breather is faster, it may indicate that she can hear us."

Kelly's face lit up, turning to Matt. His facial features had not changed. Kelly then understood what Matt had done: he had hidden this information.

"You little monster! You knew and you didn't tell us?"

"She... She just squeezed my hand!" Matt tried to justify.

"That's why you frowned earlier, huh?"

He didn't answer, looking down and nodding.

"Matt, I'm kidding alright? I know exactly why you didn't and I can't blame you for that."

As usual, the doctor didn't get it. Nobody could understand this connection between Matt and Kelly. Nobody could understand that they knew what the other felt or thought.

"Alright, can we go back to our task? Unfortunately I don't have a lot of time before my surgery."

"Oh, sorry. Yeah", Kelly apologized for Matt and himself.

Dr. Bradigan then moved forward the bed, smiling.

"Okay, I explain. After we discovered your vision problem, we tested it to know which correction you need. For your left eye, the one that suffered the least, there is a little correction for hypermetropia, meaning your far sight. For your right eye, we recreated the cones for color vision and your far sight."

Sometimes, words were still too complicated for Matt to understand what it meant. And it was even more horrible when he didn't know the words.

"I think it would be a better idea to try, so that Matt can understand", Kelly then asked, seeing Matt's face with the corner of his eyes.

"Indeed", he confirmed with a smile. "So, here are your glasses. They are tinted to be adapted to daytime vision."

The doctor tended the glossed to Matt, who took it in hand. He was scared, scared for the result.

"Come on Matt, it's time."

Matt inhaled and exhaled deeply and slowly. He was ready. He spread the branches of the glasses, then closed his eyes before putting them on his nose. He waited several seconds, feeling Gabby's hand squeeze his hand again, as an encouragement. Slowly, he opened his eyes, looking around him, smiling inwardly. His sight was almost back to normal, far and near, he could see colors perfectly and wasn't dazzled. He was a relief for him, but he was so used to his new vision in black and white and so, it bothered him. He removed the glasses and shook his head.

"A problem? With the correction?"

"It's not this", Matt assured in a haste.

He said nothing, looking down again. Kelly understood immediately, remembering his previous conversation.

"Matt is used to his new vision. He doesn't want it to change again", Kelly explained.

"Oh, I get it. In that case, I can give you new glasses with no recreation of colors."

"It's... Possible?" Matt asked.

"Everything is possible. I give you these one, in case you change your mind. And after my surgery, I immediately put myself to work. It would take much less time, in a couple days you will have them."

"Thanks doc."

He left the room, leaving Kelly and Matt alone, the latter caressing continuously Gabby's hand.

* * *

A huge headache. That was what characterized her feelings. As if a bell was continuously ringing in his ears, as if a hammer was banging on it to make it resonate. It made her deaf. Slowly, she woke all her senses one by one, savoring the warmth enveloping her, licking her face. It didn't bother her, quite the contrary. It made her feel better. Her nose was sending her powerful olfactory signals: there were bleach and antibacterial odors. Every cell in her body was sending her answers to her questions. Where she was, how bad she was, with whom, why? She was lying down, lying in a very comfortable and soft bed, her head gently resting on a pillow. She could feel a blanket resting on her legs to below her stomach. She could guess that an oximeter was hung on her left index finger, as well as two IV dipping under her skin to reach her bloodstream and give her the necessary fluids for the proper functioning of her still asleep body. Her eyes weren't open yet but she could imagine this thick fog blocking her vision, surrounding her with its cold and powerful arms. And sounds were becoming louder with time, voices became more audible, now distinguishing two men. One voice was near her, really next to her, as if it was her own voice. But it wasn't the case. The other voice seemed slightly further away, but she could hear and understand it.

"I am a little anx-xious."

It was Matt's voice, the one next to her. She then felt her heart beating faster, or at least she thought it was, because nothing indicated it. She wanted so much to open her eyes to see the face of the man she was in love with.

"Don't worry Matt, everything is gonna be alright."

This voice was the furthest one, Kelly's voice. Deep down, she was crying, overwhelmed by all the emotions that were coming along.

"Kelly... I'm used to my sight now. I... I don't know whether I want it change again or not."

"Matt... If you don't want it, then don't. It's that simple. But before taking your final decision, I want you to try. Please."

"Kelly... Even though I have my vision back... I can't be a firefighter anymore."

In a way, Gabby's heart sank, as her stomach. Hearing these words from the mouth of the man she loved and who never gave up was hard to take.

"W-what do you mean?"

"Kelly. DO you think that they will allow me to go back to work when a slight light source, I become blind?"

"Partially blind."

Gabby laughed inwardly : Kelly was trying to put into perspective the situation, and knowing Matt, this didn't necessarily please him. But what worried her the most wasn't knowing what was wrong with Matt's sight.

"You know what I meant. Blind means a danger for me and also my team and yours. I don't want to risk the life of my men, I can't."

It was painful to hear, but Matt was right. If he felt unable to do something, he didn't do it. And it was all his strength. He was wise.

"Matt, there are numerous solutions to rectify your vision. The ophthalmologist is coming soon, we can ask him, alright?"

Gabby was sure he would give up, to not offend Kelly. But she also wanted to show him her support while she couldn't. So, she tried to command her muscles, but nothing worked. She could feel Matt's hand in hers, but even squeeze it back was impossible. Deep down, she seethed, she was angry at herself.

"Ok."

What? Matt really gave up? No, it was impossible for Gabby, not Matt, her Matt. Mentally, she hit her face, she hurt herself to move her hand, even the slightest. After some seconds hitting herself, relief invaded her: she managed to move.

"Something's wrong Matt?"

She understood. She understood that her movement had been felt by Matt. She understood when she felt him squeeze her right hand stronger.

"I just... Want her to be awake, to open her eyes and... Tell me that everything is fine and gonna be fine."

Gabby smiled, devouring every word pronounced by the man of her life. She wanted so much to see his face, she wanted so much to caress him, to kiss him impetuously. And more if possible. She wished more than anything in this world to be in Matt's arms again.

"She's gonna wake up. Believe in this. She's too stubborn to not wake up."

Kelly was right, she was very stubborn, and she wanted to prove it by waking up soon. She heard Matt laugh slightly.

"You're right. She's stubborn."

This made Gabby laugh as well. But it was more a laugh meaning 'I will punch you for having said that'. So, Gabby focused again to move her hand, to tell him that she was there and head everything. And she did it several seconds later. She found that it was now much easier to command her body, but she still felt too weak to open her eyes. She then heard a knock and someone entered.

"Hi Matt ! How are you today ?"

"Good, thanks."

A silence settled for some seconds. No sounds but these constant beeps proving to Gabby that she was indeed alive.

"Don't worry doc. He spends all his free time watching her."

Gabby blushed indefinitely. She had the sensation that her heart was beating faster again, her breathing was becoming faster, as when she had fallen in love with Matt. But she blushed even more because now, she could feel Matt's loving gaze on her face. And she felt good, it gave her strength.

"Apparently, it's called love."

"Yeah, indeed. And then you can't get rid of this disease..."

She heard two men laugh, probably Kelly and this doctor.

"Her breathing seems faster."

So, her breathing had really become faster. She could therefore be in interaction with the reality. A new silence settled in the room while Gabby was still gaining strength in hope to open her eyes.

"For how long she's in a coma?"

In a coma? This made her shiver. On the other, if Matt was next to her as she could feel him, it meant that it shouldn't be that long. According to her.

"A little over a month. It was a deep coma, but the neurosurgeon told us that it's a light one now."

"You... Do you know her GCS?"

"Huh... I think it's 7... 5 fir her motor response, 1 for her verbal response and 1 for her eye opening."

"Mh... In that case, if her breather is faster, it may indicate that she can hear us."

"You little monster! You knew and you didn't tell us?"

"She... She just squeezed my hand!"

"That's why you frowned earlier, huh?"

This made Gabby laugh: he said nothing. But she could understand: she didn't know how much time it would take for her to open her eyes. And it frustrated her.

"Matt, I'm kidding alright? I know exactly why you didn't and I can't blame you for that."

"Alright, can we go back to our task? Unfortunately I don't have a lot of time before my surgery."

"Oh, sorry. Yeah."

She heard something coming closer.

"Okay, I explain. After we discovered your vision problem, we tested it to know which correction you need. For your left eye, the one that suffered the least, there is a little correction for hypermetropia, meaning your far sight. For your right eye, we recreated the cones for color vision and your far sight."

Color vision. Having had a paramedic training and having taken some class nights to go in medical school, Gabby knew what it meant : Matt was seeing in black and white with his right eye. The hit from the accident had been very powerful, she remembered. She remembered this moment when she straightened and saw Matt going under a car a dozen feet away from the hit. It had been sufficient to leave him with permanent damage.

"I think it would be a better idea to try, so that Matt can understand."

"Indeed. So, here are your glasses. They are tinted to be adapted to daytime vision."

Gabby felt anxiety growing inside of her. She was anxious for Matt.

"Come on Matt, it's time."

She heard Matt breathing slowly while she showed him her presence, squeezing her beloved's hand again. But this powerful silence was telling her that something was wrong.

"A problem? With the correction?"

"It's not this."

"Matt is used to his new vision. He doesn't want it to change again."

"Oh, I get it. In that case, I can give you new glasses with no recreation of colors."

"It's... Possible?"

"Everything is possible. I give you these one, in case you change your mind. And after my surgery, I immediately put myself to work. It would take much less time, in a couple days you will have them."

"Thanks doc."

The door closed while she heard Matt sigh.

"Matt?"

"She... Gabby didn't stop squeezing my hand", he admitted.

Someone next to her moved, some cold fingers came on her left cheeks and her head turned to the right.

"Gabby, if you really can hear me... I need you. I need to see your brown eyes. I need to see your smile. I know you can open your eyes, I have faith. So please. Open your eyes for me."

This plaintive speech just gave strength to Gabby. Enough strength to try to order her body to open her eyes. She focused, even to move her eyelids. She was trying, she didn't want to fail, remembering those words coming from the man of her life.

"Come on Gabby. Just a little effort, you can open your eyes. Show me this light in your eyes, this light I miss so much, the one that will never dazzle me."

The more the seconds passed, the more this infinite and invisible strength allowed her to do what she wanted, what she wished to do above all. She cried over herself, hoping to do like with that hand tightening, but this time with her eyes.

"I love you Gabby, I know you can do it", she heard Matt whisper in her right ear.

Several seconds later, a miracle happened: she frowned slightly, she felt Matt's frozen fingers caressing her cheek, mentally still encouraging her untiringly. And then, her eyelids open, revealing the totally blurred features of the man she loved. It was almost nothing for her but for Matt, it seemed to be the happiest day of his life. Because not even a second later, she could feel water droplets fall on her face. Matt was probably crying of joy. And then, she felt his lips on hers. His lips as mild ad cold, but she had forgotten his contours. Those lips she adored and had missed so much. Matt was kissing her, holding a sob for sure. She could feel him, she could smell his fragrance, she could feel his hand firmly but gently squeezing hers, the one she squeezed back.

"You're back..."

Yes, Gabby was back. And it was for good.


	29. Welcome aboard Diam!

Hello my dear ! THANK YOU SO MUCH for the amount of reviews I had for the previous chapter ^^ 11 reviews my top score haha

SO (serious tone), ahem... I will introduce a new character (sort of) in the story. I have to thank some friends who help me to find an appropriate name (thanks Meghan and Sarra ^^) for the character.

Here we come, I hope you will like this chapter as much as the previous one :D

And thank you again

* * *

 **Chapter 28: Welcome aboard Diam!**

"How are you feeling?" Matt finally asked while he couldn't stop watching her as if it was their first meeting.

Gabby swallowed with difficulty, slightly frowning as she started sighing.

"Like I've been hit by a truck..."

Matt smiled, kissing her once again, despite his frozen lips. He liked this heat contrast. It gave him a thrill of intense pleasure he never had thought of feeling again. Discreetly, Kelly had called for a nurse, leaving Matt and Gabby enjoy each other and have an intimate moment, despite his presence. Several seconds later, Serena appeared in the room, surprised. Her eyes wide open, she couldn't talk for a while, gazed by the two lovers.

"Serena, meet Gabby", Matt then stated to get her out of her thoughts, which he'd managed for only a minute.

The nurse shook her head from side to side, then continued looking at Gabby as if she was a stranger, astonished. This scene made Kelly laugh.

"Look like you saw a ghost!"

This time, Serena managed to come out of this hypnotic state in which she was and focused again to do her job.

"Sorry. It was inappropriate for me", she apologized. "How are you feeling Gabby?"

"Not bad", she whispered as loud as she could. "For someone who had been hit by a car a month ago."

Matt slightly tilted his head backward, frowning and confused.

"How..."

"I heard you with the ophthalmologist", she interrupted. "I started being conscious when you were going to try your glasses."

A smile came to illuminate Matt's face who tirelessly kept watching every facial features of the woman he was in love with.

"By the way..."

As she could, Gabby lifted her arm, her muscular weakness present, despite Sacha's work on her, and she put her hand on Matt's face as to give him a slap.

"It was supposed to be a slap... For having said that I was stubborn."

Matt couldn't help but burst out laughing. She really heard that.

"But you are, aren't you?" he said between two laughs.

"You didn't have to say it..."

While the two lovers were enjoying each other, Serena checked all the machines hooked to Gabby, then did the same with Matt.

"What about you Matt? How are you feeling?"

"I feel better, now you're awake", he admitted with a blush.

"That's not what I meant..."

Matt had perfectly understood what she meant, but he simply wanted to show her how much she meant to him.

"I will get better. In no time."

"You really want to end your career as a firefighter?"

She also heard this, obviously. It hurt Matt to admit it, but there was no chance for him to get back to work as before this accident. He had adapted to this thought.

"Let's focus on you for now, okay?" he tried to change her mind off this. "You just woke up, so you need a..."

He stopped, unable to say this word in one shot. So, he decided to find an alternative.

"You need a complete overhaul."

"Matt is right", Serena continued. "Standard procedure."

"What did I have? Injuries I mean."

"Well... Your right vestibular system has been damaged due to the shock, you had some broken ribs, your right lung collapsed and your spleen had exploded. You also had a huge swelling in your auditory cortex region. And a broken right arm."

Trained as a paramedic and having a medical knowledge, she knew what it meant.

"My vestibular system is totally destroyed?"

"Not entirely. Just your ability to balance your vision and your location in space."

"I must learn how to walk with one vestibular system?"

"Yes. But Sacha and Emma will be here to help you."

"Who?"

"Our physiotherapist", Matt answered. "Don't worry, you'll love them", he assured.

"And you Matt? I... I remember you, covered in blood."

Matt also remembered. To tell the truth, he remembered almost everything now.

"Yeah, huh... I... Can't really explain", he admitted.

He then turned to Serena, who would be the best to explain to Gabby.

"Matt suffered great damage. He's suffering from a quite severe brain injury handicapping him: he can't see in colors with his right eyes, he had to relearn how to talk and walk, he had a ten years amnesia. He had two brain bleeds and had nearly been declared brain dead. His aorta ruptured twice, his left lung collapsed, one of his broken ribs punctured his stomach, his right femur and right arm had been broken. The force of the hit ruptured his diaphragm, but most of his injuries are healed now. And soon, he will be as good as new", she assured with a smile.

Matt had trouble keeping up, but with the amount of medical vocabulary, he knew that it was bad. Kelly and Shay had taken the time to explain this to him with simple words when he woke up after his second aortic rupture.

"So... You didn't remember me?" she asked to Matt, turning her head to him;

"Nope. But... I draw your face without knowing you and... Kelly and Shay told me. I've learned to love you again. And it wasn't hard", he said, smiling and passing his right hand through her hair to move away one of her locks.

"I'm happy you're not dead. I was so scared when the car..."

"Don't think about it anymore Gabby, alright? We're here, we're alive. We survived and we'll get through this. Together."

Kelly got out for a while, leaving Serena and Emily take care of the two lovebirds to call Shay and Antonio, then Christie. He didn't say that Gabby was awake. He just told them that something happened, but nothing more, fears raised in their chest. What was their surprise to see Gabby fully awake and alert when they entered in the room. Leslie burst into tears in Kelly's arms, slapping him having scared her like this while Antonio came to hug his sister, crying as well. Christie had been more set back, happy for everyone and especially her brother, seeing him smile and laugh for the first time in weeks.

"I have to go. Something to do. Can you stay here?"

"Yeah, no problem", Leslie assured, kissing Kelly. "See you later."

Out of the room, Kelly went directly to the office of the ophthalmologist. He saw his secretary who explained that Dr. Bragidan was in surgery for two more hours. He told her that he would come by later because he needed to talk to him about something. He came outside, happy to see Gabby finally awake. But he had to do something now, something important: he promised Matt to find him a dog, and he wanted a special one. So, he went to the refuge to give a new start to one of them, a second chance to have a loving family.

"Hello and welcome to the Chicago refuge! May I help you, dear firefighter?" she asked, seeing his jacket.

"Hello, yeah. Actually, I'm looking for a dog."

"You're at the right place then! Any idea for the breed?"

"Not at all, I... I'm looking for a dog who fought to survive. The perfect dog."

The young woman welcomed him and smiled.

"I think I have the perfect one for you."

She invited Kelly to follow her in the hallways and stopped in front of one of the cages.

"Meet Diam."

It was a few month old dog, almost entirely white and slightly gray. He seemed playful, stirring quickly his tail, as if he was happy.

"Diam?"

"A short name for Diamond. This baby is a warrior. We found him almost dead, abandoned by his mother. My brother is a veterinarian and took care of him to get him back on his feet, and against all odds, he survived. We called him Diam for this, because diamond is the hardest stone in the world, almost indestructible. Diam is our survivor."

His story was fabulous, almost similar to Matt. It warmed his heart. And above all, it was a plus for him.

"We have a dog in our firehouse, same breed. A female. His owners abandoned her and we took care of her. I... May I take him in my arms?"

"Sure!"

She opened the cage, Kelly crouching to take him. The dog rushed at him, crazy and playful, jumping up and emitting small sounds, as if he was even happier. He was full of energy. He put forth his hand to see his reaction, and he began to feel his fingers and then licked them tenderly, making Kelly smile.

"I think he's perfect. How old is he?"

"We estimate that he's six months old. As I said, he's a fighter, but he still has trouble staying clean, but it's on the road. If you take him, go see my brother on the other side of the street, he will know what to give you and advise you", she said with a new smile.

"In that way, I take him. He's... Perfect."

"I give you his leash, what food we give him and his toys. And I call my brother."

"Thanks so much."

The little dog in arms, the woman came to help him to put everything in his car and show him where was her brother. Once there, the pet physician welcomed him.

"Hello! My sister told me you were coming!"

"Hi doc. Apparently you took care of him."

"Sara told him his story?"

"Your sister? Big lines yeah."

The veterinarian brought him into the back room, placing the baby on the table.

"We found Diam very weak, hungry and abandoned by his mother because apparently he couldn't follow her. After further tests, we realized that his heart was weakened because of a small and continuous tear."

"Like... A rupture?"

"Yeah, if you want. I operated him, I repaired the damage, I took care of him. He didn't ever think he would survive because he was very weak, we could see his bones. But he had been very brave and valiant. Hence his name."

"Yeah, your sister told me about his name."

The doctor did a full check-up, as if the dog was one he didn't know, professionally.

"Can I ask you why Diam? Usually, nobody chose him because of his story."

"Precisely for his story."

Kevin, the veterinarian, turned to him, frowning.

"I don't understand."

"I explain. My best friend has been hit by a car a month ago, as well as his girlfriend. They almost died, especially Matt. But they're still alive. They held on, and while he was in a coma, I promised to buy him a dog if he was recovering. I was looking for a dog who had a similar story."

Kevin smiled, nodding.

"I get it. Diam will be perfect for him."

"We have a female dog in our firehouse, same breed. Maybe they'll become best friend."

"If she's not sterilized, maybe you will have some little warriors as well", Kevin joked, making Kelly laugh. "Sara warned you that he wasn't clean yet?"

"Indeed."

"I give you this special diapers. Diam is supporting them well. I guess your friends are still in hospital?"

"Yeah, Gabby just woke up today! So, I thought it was good to give them a gift."

Kevin ended his check-up and stood up.

"So, our little warrior is in a good shape! He gained some weight, which is very good, he's very playful and active. You have an advantage with Diam: when he rolls into a ball and starts crying, then something's wrong with him. I noticed this, when after the surgery, his sutures hurt him."

"So, if it happens, I bring him to you immediately?"

"With his papers, you can bring him to any pet doctor, you know."

"But he's used to you. Even though you're at the other end of the city, I'll bring him to you."

The two men shared a smile, putting Diam to the ground.

"How much I owe you?"

"Nothing. It's a pleasure to see Diam useful for someone who suffered the same problem."

"Thank so much", Kelly thanked, shaking Kevin's hand.

He came back to the hospital to present this new companion to his new family. Kelly took him in his arms, Diam licking slightly his face again. He hardly put a diaper on him, because he knew that he would stay in the room for a while. If Gabby and Matt was awake. He climbed the stairs of the ICU with the dog, soon stopped by Emily.

"Seriously? A dog?" she asked, laughing.

"I promised", he justified himself.

But he didn't have to : the nurse was in the same room when he made this promise, the one that Matt heard while Kelly didn't think it was possible.

"Gabby and Matt fell asleep. In the arms of each other. Leslie is still inside, Christie left and Antonio had a call from his boss."

He nodded, anxious to know what wanted Voight when it was Antonio's day off.

"I can enter?"

"Yeah, sure! No problem. What is your name beautiful boy?"

"His name is Diam. And he's also a fighter."

"Diam? It's original!"

"Short name for Diamond, because he's strong as a diamond."

"I get it. In that case, welcome aboard Diam!" she announced, caressing him.

Kelly entered the room, asking Shay to make any noise, but smiling, taking the dog off his arms to hug him. As they learned how to sign, they started signing.

 _ **What is his name?**_

 _ **Diam**_ , Kelly spelled. _**A short name for Diamond, because he's a fighter, he's a warrior.**_

 _ **Matt will love him! He looks like Pouch in a masculine mode!**_

 _ **That's also why I took him.**_

They kissed, saying 'I love you' to each other while Gabby and Matt woke up. Surprised, they opened their eyes while Kelly was taking Matt off the breathing machine.

"Who is this buddy!"

Matt smiled, remembering what Kelly promised while he was in a coma but heard perfectly. Kelly smiled back, understanding Matt's smile.

"Matt, Gabby. Meet Diam. Your new companion!"

Leslie then placed the puppy on Matt's legs. The god felt immediately that his new father had some troubles. So, he slowly climbed his leg to go to his stomach. Feeling that he wasn't hurting him, he approached his nose to Matt's face, inhaling his fragrance then licking his chin.

"Hey, you! Hello Diam!"

"Welcome aboard Diam! Welcome in our big family!"

* * *

 **A/N: Yes, this character is a dog, it was a promise made by Kelly at the end of chapter 20. His name is Diam, and it has to be pronounced like the name Liam (Hemsworth, for those who know him), or like you say to someone that he's a liar.**

 **I hope you like :D**


	30. A loony idea

**Hello everyone! It's been a while I haven't updated this story, huh? Well, I am kind of busy right now, so I apologize.**

 **And I also want to tell you that the next chapter (after this one) will be the last of the story. Yes, I have no longer inspiration and I don't like seeing stories on hiatus so I will end this one (a happy end, don't worry).**

 **Have a good reading ^^**

* * *

 **Chapter 29: A loony idea**

Today, it was the day of every test for Gabby, when she would know which part of her vestibular system is the most injured, and it was only possible while conscious. Therefore, they had had to wait her awakening before anything, which was the case now. It highly worried Matt, but he said nothing and didn't show it either. About ten in the morning, Gabby had been brought out of the room for the exams, leaving Matt and Kelly alone, Leslie taking care of Diam the time for the two lovers to get out of the hospital.

"You sure you okay, Matt? You seem… Distracted", Kelly worried though.

Jumping slightly, he turned his head toward this voice and sighed. He couldn't really hide his emotions and feelings, no longer after this accident.

"I feel… I don't know, I have this pit in my s-stomach, preventing me from being… Me."

"A… A pit in your stomach? You're worried? Stressed?"

"Uh… We can say that."

Matt didn't want to go further, but he understood this unasked question coming from his best friend.

"Gabby", he simply said.

"Ah. I get it. You're worried about the final diagnosis."

He slightly nodded, the, turning his head to the other side. Something was missing, or rather someone. He felt empty, he wanted to be with her, close to the being who was giving him the strength to fight and move forward. He sank a long sigh.

"You already miss her?" Severide laughed.

But Matt couldn't answer. Because he didn't understand either. A big part of his memory was back now, but he still didn't understand why Gabby was making such an effect on him. He felt complete near her, he felt stronger, he was happy. But when she wasn't around, it was the entire opposite. He was sad and felt weak, as depressed.

"She will come back in no time, Matt. You want to change your mind? Sacha told you to walk a bit. You want to try?"

If Matt didn't accept, then Kelly would insist or do anything else to distract him. And he needed to move from this bed.

"Okay. But… It scares me though. To walk without assistance."

"Matt. Your leg is healed, your pelvis is getting gradually stronger. Plus, if he put this awful thing over there", he said, pointing the wheeled walker placed in the corner of the room, "it is for a good reason: training and therapy by yourself as well. And I am here", Kelly assured.

After several seconds of reflection, Matt nodded, pulling out the covers and swinging his body to the right while breathing deeply to sit. Kelly took the rollator and placed it in front of Matt, who gripped the handles and stood up, supported in the back by his best friend.

"Here, that's it. Not painful so far?"

"Not yet, no", Matt assured to his big surprise.

"Don't be mister doom and gloom, Matt. Everything is gonna be alright, you'll see."

Matt still remembered this sharp pain having gone throughout his body the first time he got on his feet during the last PT session with Sacha. It had frozen him so much, he had fallen backward and had been supported by the physiotherapist. It was in some ways blocked him.

"Come on, one step at the time okay?"

He nodded, starting then to move his foot.

* * *

In another room of the hospital, the staff was preparing Gabby for some tests to assess the damage caused by the accident in her inner ear. The neurologist, Dr. Riley was here and was smiling at her.

"So, do you know what to expect?"

"Absolutely not", she said, distracted.

She was also thinking about Matt. She had remained in a coma for a month, and she could see that something had changed in Matt. Not physically, but mentally.

"Gabby?"

She startled, facing the physician who was talking to her.

"Sorry, what?"

"I said that we were going to assess the damage caused in your inner ear."

"Okay. And… What do we do?"

"We need you to a standing position, eyes closed and you will tell us what you are feeling."

"Meaning? I am not sure to understand well."

"Your vestibular system had been damaged by the hit with the car. We need to know which pathway had been damaged to afford us to help you the best we can. There are four pathways and we can know which one is damaged with your symptoms while up. For the vestibulo-ocular pathway, it's a nystagmus. As you don't have one, your VOP is intact."

"Okay, so depending on my reactions, we'll know which pathway is damaged."

"Indeed. And for that, we need you in a standing position. You will tell us what are your feelings, whether dizziness, nausea or headaches, everything. It will help us a lot."

"Okay."

The nursing staff came to help her to get up. She winced more than once during the process and closed her eyes, as asked by Dr. Riley. Soon, she felt invaded by a strong discomfort. She thought it was the fact of being up after such a long time in a coma, but the doctor had required to report any strange things.

"I… Don't feel good."

"Dizziness? Nausea?"

"It's… More a discomfort, but I think it's…"

She thought, for fear of saying something stupid. She felt like tossing around, as if she was on a ship.

"I feel weird, like… swung from one side to the other."

"I see. More to the left or the right?"

"Right."

"Any other symptoms?"

"No."

"Nothing like vomiting, no nausea?"

"Not at all."

"Okay. I will run one more scan to be sure of my diagnosis, and then we'll talk", Dr. Riley said, smiling.

An hour later, the doctor came back in the room and sat in front of Gabby.

"I have a diagnosis. I have asked some other specialists to be sure, and they agreed. Your vestibular system is indeed damaged. I told you about four pathways, do you remember?"

"Yes. Which way is damaged?"

The anxiety grew in Gabby. She was scared of the diagnosis, of a really bad one.

"Your vestibulo-spinal pathway. It comes from your spinal cord and goes up to your cerebellum. It's from this pathway we control our body's balance in a standing position, whether walking or running."

"I… I have no longer balance?" she hesitated to say.

"This pathway keeps your head straight with your shoulders, and it allows the gaze stability when your body is moving. To make it simple and in your case, your head will lean to the right and will give you the sensation of being tossed. Hence your swinging sensation. But we'll fix this."

"It's… It's possible?"

"Yes, and I know how! I have the same problem with my left inner hear. I will talk to Sacha and Emma about it, but I am able to help."

It was enough for her to be reassured. She told herself that when she would be fully healed, she could be a paramedic again, or even redo the exams to become a firefighter.

"You… You're working with Matt as well, aren't you?"

Surprised by the sudden question, the doctor leaned his head back, slightly frowning for a second.

"Indeed."

"He… He suffers a lot. Am I right?"

Hesitating, he knew that sooner or later she would know what he did to Matt.

"Yes, and I have something to do with this, unfortunately. I intend to make it right now."

"What did you do?"

"We are testing a kind of a… A cerebral defibrillator. It's not really ready yet, and your friend Kelly gave us his consent. But I didn't tell him everything."

"So, he's blaming you."

"Yes, and I get it. I should have told him everything. Matt is the first patient on whom it was tested at full capacity. And I have to say that I am impressed. Most of the patients we have tested are struggling to regain full function of their body this quickly."

"Meaning?"

Dr. Riley took a deep breath and continued. It was hard for him to explain this to a patient, even though it wasn't a secret.

"Matt had to relearn everything: walk, write, talk. Everything. And in a month, he has made huge progress. More than all my previous patients."

"You mean that… Matt is like your ideal patient?"

"There is no ideal patient, everyone reacts differently. Matt is the first one treated with such injuries. I honestly thought he couldn't make it."

"You don't know the man who shares my life apparently. Matt is a fighter, from day one. He never gives up."

"That's what I understand."

"He will get there. He will recover. He will come back at work and I will come back as a paramedic. And if everything goes as planned, I will fight to the end to become a firefighter."

* * *

After having turned around the ICU, Kelly and Matt entered the room again, the latter completely exhausted from the trip. Just lying, he was closing his eyes and Kelly had to act fast to connect him to the breathing machine. He had to leave his brother to rest and see the ophthalmologist. So, he got out, heading to his office. Fortunately, he was here this time. He knocked and entered when the doctor said so.

"Mr. Severide! What a surprise! Your brother changed his mind?"

"No. Well, I don't think he won't."

"Oh", Dr. Bradigan said, disappointed. "You came here to tell me this?"

"To tell you the truth… I don't know if he will change his mind after that, but I have an idea."

The doctor sat down again, telling Kelly that he could as well.

"I don't think it's something possible at the time, and it's a completely crazy idea."

"Go on."

Kelly then explained what he had in mind for over five minutes.

"Indeed. Your idea is completely loony!" the doctor laughed. "But I am ready to face this challenge. It will give him hope, I guess, and I need all the authorizations to start this."

"I will put my relationships on. Matt deserves this."

"I am totally with you on this one. But does he want it?"

Kelly was wondering as well. It was Matt's dream, but he had already given up because of the accident.

"It will give him hope for sure, for not only him. And you can understand why: if it works…"

"I completely get it, don't worry. I hope I will do it. For him."

Once back in the room, Kelly remained quiet, staring at the two lovers asleep in each other's arms. The walk had exhausted Matt, and Gabby also was because of the lack of PT session. Seeing them reunited like this, it warmed his heart, and it gave him the urge to hug strongly the woman he loved: Shay. He called Antonio to make him come and stay with Matt and his sister and then ran to his car to come back home and join Leslie. Once arrived and warmly greeted by Diam, he took her into his arms and kissed her as he never did before. It was this something missing in his life for years, since he met her at the firehouse 51. He fell in love with her at the first sight, and now, she felt the same for him. Their two friends were out of the wood, they finally confessed their feeling for each other. Their life could resume their journey.


	31. Epilogue: a new life

Hello my dear readers!

This is the final chapter of this amazing story, and with the amount of review I had from chapter one, I guess you liked it. But I have no longer inspiration, and I prefer to end GTT on a good note rather than a bad one.

As I told you, this is a happy ending, as usual with me. You will know what kind of project Kelly and Dr. Bradigan have had (and I really hope you will like it), and what kind of life Matt and Gabby will have now.

I can't explain more, because you are going to read it, but I would like to read your thoughts about this story and this end. It would cheer me up to see all of you writing something in a review ^^

 **I hope you liked this story, and if someone has an idea for a sequel or anything, just tell me. I am up to every proposal.**

* * *

 **Chapter 30 (epilogue): A new life**

After two months of intensive rehab in a medical center, Matt and Gabby had been cleared to get out of this hell and come back to their apartment, the one Leslie and Klly had taken great care in their absence. The two lovers had faced numerous obstacles the time for them to readjust to their new life, especially Gabby. She struggled, worked hard until the complete exhaustion of her body, in order to simply prove to everyone that, despite her new disability, she could continue the job of her dream, or at least continue to dream. She knew it would take a lot of time before passing the exams to become a firefighter, and she felt not ready to do this, but coming back to the firehouse and working with her partner in crimes again made her the happiest woman in this world. The only hitch in this story was that Mat could no longer be a fireman, and he started to become depressed. No longer able to see colors with an eye, his director eye, it meant that his career was over. The Headquarters had granted to reversion of three-quarters of his salary as a lieutenant, which was more than enough for a living, in addition to the salary of Gabby, but he didn't like this. He felt like a prisoner, unable to achieve what he wanted. He couldn't work anymore as a self-constructor, not like before: having refused to wear the glasses from Dr. Bradigan, any light blinded him and his right side became a huge blind spot. He had tried once to work on a frame, he had ended up in hospital with cracked bones in his hand because he had kicked himself with a hammer. Since then, he languished in the apartment, rejecting Gabby without wanting it. The only one cheering Matt up was Diam, crying endlessly when Matt was angry. So, he took him in his arms, lay down on the sofa or the bed and laid Diam on his chest, the dog posing at full length on Matt and placing its muzzle on his chin. It was a weird position for Gabby, but this greatly soothed Matt so, she said nothing. She couldn't, because in his place, she would be in the same state of mind. She knew it wasn't against her, but against his disability. Stay at home as he had to, he was just becoming crazy, almost not leaving the bedroom, almost not feeding anymore, despair had seized him. All this for an eye. Matt said nothing, but he was on the precipice, he was ready to take the big step. His whole life had changed suddenly, and this life wasn't for him. It seemed weird, but he missed fighting fires, he missed saving lives, being at the firehouse with his friends. This life was behind him, and he wanted endlessly to look over his shoulder. It couldn't end like this.

* * *

Kelly often came to the hospital to help Dr. Bradigan as he could on their project. It was hard for him to not get the attention of the others, but he always found a few hours here and there to come. The project was progressing well, the duo having obtained all conceivable permissions to achieve it. It meant a lot for them, specifically for the physician. If he managed to complete this, they were necessarily going to talk about him, and it put more pressure on him. Surprisingly, the Headquarters of the Fire Department was very interested by the idea developed by Kelly, and they had a good reason. But before this, they had to succeed. It's been two months now, the two men worked as damned, finding the materials, designing models, it required so much precision that they became hopeless. During the ninth week of work, Kelly had arrived in their workroom, completely out of himself, explaining to the doctor that they had to hurry because Matt was in very bad shape and that they had to succeed within the next couple days in order to not lose him forever, because he was close of breaking. The ophthalmologist understood this perfectly well, and worked twice harder than before, spending his free times, his nights, his family moments in order to succeed. Almost a week later, the doctor suddenly began to scream and jump of joy, calling Kelly in the second to explain that he had completed their project and it seemed to work. The latter called immediately the Headquarters for assistance and to test the project in a simulation at the Academy, something the chiefs accepted. After all, if it really worked, it could give hope to many people.

"Are you ready Kelly? We must now give the news to Matt, huh?"

"Hell yeah! But, I think it would be better to do this to Molly's, our bar. I'll call Herrmann and Otis to organize it this evening. And I have to call Gabby as well, to manage to convince Matt to come."

Soon, he grabbed his cell phone to call everyone and ask them to come to Molly's the very evening without explaining anything. And they accepted. Even Gabby had managed to convince Matt to come with her and Diam to spend some time with everyone, even though she didn't know why, she trusted Kelly blindly. Around 9pm, all the members of the firehouse 51 were gathered around Matt, who tried to smile while he didn't want to be there, he wanted to come back to the apartment and lie down on the bed, as he was used to now. So, Kelly decided to take action. He called Dr. Bradigan, who arrived about ten minutes later with a large package in hands, wrapped in gift paper with fire truck patterns, making laugh a lot of people in the bar. Matt saw it with a jaundiced eye and had already stood up, ready to leave.

"Hi, Matt. I have a little something for you", the doctor explained, putting the package on a table.

Soon, Matt turned to Kelly, his eyes almost filled with anger.

"Kelly, if you've convinced Gabby to take me here just to give me a gift and try to cheer me up, then I go. I don't want to be here."

Matt was already turning tail when Kelly placed his left hand on his shoulder to make him turn. There was nothing to say at this precise moment: the two friends, the two brothers knew each other enough to no longer need to speak.

"Matt, please. I… Please."

Seeing the despair in Kelly's eyes, Matt quickly understood that it was important enough to hear the voice of his brother completely broken and trembling.

He looked down a little and nodded, turning to the table. He sighed and began to tear the paper, then open the box. When he saw what was inside, he frowned and got the object out: a SCBA. But Matt knew well these materials, and he saw almost immediately that there were some things new. The glass was more tinged, there was a king of a lever on the side of the mask. He was intrigued, lost, with his mind full of questions as he turned to a smiling doctor.

"What is this joke?" he said, pissed.

"Matt, Matt, calm down!"

"No, I won't calm down! You gave me a SCBA while I can't be a firefighter anymore! I'm out of here!"

He ran toward the door, but Herrmann stopped him immediately, despite the fact that Matt was forcing the passage. This 'gift' was the last straw for him. Crying and screaming, he collapsed to the ground, only supported by the fireman who had trained him and Gabby, who threw her eyes filled with anger at Kelly and the ophthalmologist. She had trusted Kelly when she shouldn't have, and she blamed herself for having led the person she loved in Molly's when he wasn't in shape.

"Matt…", Kelly tried.

"DON'T APPROACH ME!" Matt shouted. "I don't want you to come near me! GO AWAY!"

He looked up, revealing his flushed face and his reddened eyes. All could read how Matt had plunged into darkness. In reality, it was like he was no longer himself, but his own ghost. Compressed in the middle of the members of the firehouse 51 he didn't even know, Dr. Bradigan clenched his fists. He had to explain to Matt.

"This is a special mask", he managed to say despite the ambient noise.

Everyone shut up and turned to this person none of them knew.

"It's… This mask… It's set the visually impaired for color blindness and achromatic people. Like… You."

He stopped speaking, hoping to see in his former patient any emotion. Seeing that he didn't understand, Kelly took the relay from the physician to explain this to his brother, still sitting on the floor.

"Do you remember the glasses? Those with which you had no visual problems?"

Still crying, Matt nodded hardly, trying to understand what was happening.

"I asked Dr. Bradigan to adapt this technology to our mask", Kelly explained calmly, kneeling in front of his brother. "It took us some time, but this afternoon, we succeeded and we tested it at the Academy. It works, Matt."

In a second, Matt began to realize what it meant. It was a mask made for him, and only him. A mask with which he could see, despite the intensity of the light from the flames.

"I can go back at the firehouse, Matt", Kelly then affirmed, surprising everyone.

"B-but… But… I signed them… My retirement papers", Matt stammered.

"I asked the Headquarters to put them aside, the time for us to achieve this project. The chiefs are aware, and that's why we could do this, thanks to them. You're a great firefighter Matt, nobody wanted you to give up your dream because of… Of this freaking sight. They said yes, but not only for you."

Matt frowned slightly, uncertain of what Kelly meant.

"We wanted to give you hope, but… But in reality, we give hope to all those visually impaired people who wanted and want to become a firefighter, but who can't because of their vision. We did this for you mainly, but also for them, for this new generation. So that they can become firefighters."

Matt finally understood what his brother meant: this mask, it represented all he had lost and now somehow recovered, it represented his forgotten and abandoned dream, the dream of numerous people who wanted with all their heart to be a firefighter like him, but found themselves blocked at the door of the Academy because of their disability. So, at this precise moment, it wasn't tears of anger rolling down his cheeks, it was tears of joy. Because he still could dream awake.

"Y-you… You made this f-for me?" he managed to ask between sobs.

Kelly smiled, hugging his little brother, ready to cry as well.

"Yes, Matt. I did this for you. Because I love my brother, and I don't want to lose him."

The two best friends remained still for minutes, in the arms of each other. Everyone around them were smiling, as surprised as Matt. Even Shay wasn't aware or anything, and it made her cry to see how far Kelly was ready to go for Matt's dream, he was ready to create a new technology for this. After five long minutes, Kelly helped Matt to stand and try this new mask made for him. He was thrilled, delighted. He couldn't find any words.

"And this lever?"

"Oh yeah! I've forgotten! It corresponds to the modes you can use. Each mode corresponds to a different vision: achromatic, the different types of color blindness and also normal vision, with only the correction for your sight? Myopia or hyperopia."

"Oah… You did an amazing job. You are crazy guys!"

Leslie took the opportunity to approach his beloved and kiss him.

"I can't believe you've hidden this to me."

"I haven't, you didn't ask. Not the same thing."

The two lovers laughed. Indeed, it wasn't the same thing. She knew something was off because Kelly came back home later and later every night, but she had never expected this. She had thought of everything but this.

"Oh, Matt. The headquarters would want you to spend some days at the Academy. To get back of your feet and get used to your mask. The chiefs don't want to send you in a structure fire, knowing that… Well, you know what I mean, right?"

Matt nodded, he did get it. These last few weeks, he hadn't really taken care of his body and he had lost a lot of weight and muscles. He had to resume the gym and sport in general, he had to start feeding himself properly, he had to find back all the reflexes of the job.

"When do I start?"

"There will be a new session next week. You're free to be in."

He nodded again, happy as he never had been before. Diam approached him to lick his face, as to say that he was happy for him. Then Gabby approached as well to hug him. Matt wanted to kiss her, but she avoided him.

"Out of question to kiss me after him!" she laughed, making everyone laugh at the same time.

It was a new beginning.

* * *

About a month later, Matt was back at the firehouse, taking back his former post. Just the idea of getting into his truck made him happy, and everyone could see it. The firehouse, it was his house. He felt more alive, more active, more cheerful, crunching life. But today, he didn't return to work as usual: chief Tiberg had called him to have a conversation as soon as possible. So, arrived at the Academy, he knocked at the door and came in when the chief gave him the permission.

"Chief Tiberg."

"Lieutenant Casey. Thanks for coming", he said, shaking hands. "please, have a seat."

He sat down a chair and waited Tiberg to explain the why of this conversation.

"Within the week, we will integrate an additional class at the Academy. We would like to know if you are interested to supervise this new class."

"S-supervise? But… But why me?"

"This class is reserved for the visual impaired people. And… Only you can understand them and calm their doubts. This is probably going to sound rude and inappropriate, but as you are achromatic now…"

"You think I am fit to teach them how to become a firefighter. Because I am like them."

"Indeed. It's the idea."

Matt thought, he had never really done this, teaching. But he told himself that it was like a candidate: as a lieutenant in charge, he had to teach him all the tricks of the job.

"How many recruits?"

"According to the registrar, about twenty. Dr. Bradigan and his team had already done the necessary to begin to work on the masks. They will be ready before the beginning of the class."

Dr. Bradigan had experienced a meteoric celebrity after the announcement of this technical advance, and the Headquarters had offered him the opportunity to work in the world of firefighters and develop these masks. However, every mask was unique and fit the wearer. Matt took a deep breath.

"Alright. I take up the challenge."

A week later, Matt was highly stressed. It was his first day as a teacher, and he wondered whether he would be good or not. He put on his glasses, those that beforehand, he had refused to wear when he was still in the hospital. This time, he had accepted to see colors, he had wanted everything to be as it was before.

"Everything is gonna be alright, Matt. Trust me, you're probably the only firefighter able to teach them how to become like you. That's why chief Tiberg had thought of you."

He looked down and nodded, kissing Gabby.

"You are right."

"I am always right", she teased him.

"Don't push it!"

One last hug with his beloved, one last kiss with Dia and he went to the Academy, when his class was waiting for him. Chief Tiberg came to see him to give him the box with the masks for every recruit.

"How are you feeling Matt?"

"Stressed", he admitted. "But I'll be okay, it's like the relationship between a lieutenant and his candidate, right?"

"If you want to see it like this, then yes. Go on, lieutenant. Your class is waiting for you."

He shook the chief's hand, then walked toward the classroom with the box in his hands. Arrived in front of the door, he froze. He felt his heart beating very fast in his chest, stressed and excited at the same time. So, to calm himself down, he inhaled deeply and entered. The class was noisy, but as soon as he entered, all became quiet and took place, standing and saluting him. Matt didn't show it, but he was impressed.

"Dismiss."

Everyone sat without a word while Matt put the box on the desk.

"Welcome to the Fire Academy of Chicago. I know that this class had just been inaugurated and that this class is special, but don't expect from me special treatments. You will have a very rough time, like the other recruits, even more. Because they all see your disability as it is, while the Headquarters and I see it as a benefit. You can see the world, each situation from a different perspective. And it is your advantage."

"How our color blindness can be an advantage?" one of the recruits challenged, obviously not convinced by the speech.

Nervously, Matt smiled, removing his glasses.

"Chief Tiberg asked me to supervise this class, but do you know why?"

A silence settled, none of the recruits being able to answer. So, the lieutenant decided to explain why.

"A few months ago, a car hit me at full speed. I was brain dead. The doctors tried something on my brain, which left me with color blindness in my right eye. My career as a firefighter was over, but these masks I have with me", he explained, pointing to the box behind him, "it allowed me to still be a firefighter. The technology used for your daily worn glasses was reused for those masks. Each mask of this box corresponds to the vision of one of you. I am here to teach you how to become a firefighter, but prior to train you to use this mask at full capacity. I will do to you the best firefighters we've seen."

The silence continued, the new teacher seeing in each gaze on him this little light indicating that they now trusted him. He was satisfied, he felt more at ease, listened and admired.

"We can start now?"


End file.
